Thursday, August 30, 2007

UPDATE: David Spade

Hmm.

What do the children have to say about David Spade's ocean front getaway in Malee-boo which is on the market for an eye popping $16,000,000? Y'all remember we discussed this property a few weeks back, and were particularly puzzled by the exterior, which we thought looked like it was covered in scaffolding.

Recently, additional photos of the property have surfaced with the listing information, including photos of the shabby and, dare we say, not very chic interior. Ms. Rachel Ashwell is prolly having a huge hissy fit right now looking at this low-brow version of her signature style.

We can and do appreciate a white slip-covered sort of vibe in an ocean front house, but is it just Your Mama who thinks this place looks a little, uh, a little feminine for a sexed up heterosexual bachelor?

Your Mama would never have imagined that this wee little man and his insanely snarky 'tude who bags big name babes like Lindsay Lohan, Heather Locklear, and Pam Anderson, would live up in a place like this. Perhaps we are just being ridiculously stereotypical and short sighted, but we really did expect to see an interior more reminiscent of the black leather sofa Hollywood bachelor who drives a Mercedes G55 AMG and effortlessly picks up all the short skirted and big boobed Hollywood hussies at Teddy's and LAX sort of decor.

Only time will tell if Mister Spade sells this house for anywhere close to its asking price, but in the meantime, Your Mama hopes he calls a nice gay decorator to get in there and pull the place together so that it looks like a damn $16,000,000 house.

16 comments:

Anonymous said...

Yes, very girly house. Actually very, very, very girly house.

P.S. you had me rolling with the G55 comment. I was recently on the PCH and traffic came to a halt, and I was surrounded by not one, not two, not even three, but six black G55 AMGs with black wheels. I was, all at once, proud that I hadn't ever succombed to my 2005 urge to buy one. Then I remembered that I was in Malibu, on my Blackberry, in my Rover, and that I was a big fat cliche, and nibbled on my foot for a while.

so_chic_darling said...

Surely Mr Spade could get some advice from his super chic Sister in Law,Kate Spade!I mean children all that shabby chic stuff?What is chic?Well it's many things to many people but unless were talking about the gently patinated walls of a 500 year old castle in Tuscany(the real one in Italy)shabby is just,well.SHABBY!You can't just take pieces of crap from the Rose Bowl flee market,hours after the serious dealers have swooped in on all the good stuff,lightly brush it with white paint and think that it's anything but painted junk,can you?As Mama would say it makes us puke a little in our mouth!

so_chic_darling said...

Pass the Pink Hawaiian and the September issue of World of Interiors,I need to calm down!

Anonymous said...

Obviously staged.

I'd pay $8 million, not a penny more.

Anonymous said...

Forget Palm Springs - someone please explain to me the appeal of Malibu. The beaches are practically non-existant and can you even swim in the water? Why would anyone pay $16 mil to be crammed into a tiny stretch of sand? No thank you.

Anonymous said...

Anon 8:01

It's all just because people think they are supposed to like Malibu. That's what reels you in there. I must say I used to hate the idea of Malibu, and now I really just like the pace of the area and really enjoy the place. It does take a lot to get past the ANNOYING commute and the snobbery.

The reason that people want a small shack on the water is because many (most) of them have bigger houses in town. The Bu is just a getaway. Originally it was because they wanted less to maintain, now it's just because it has gotten so disgustingly expensive that they have no choice.

Anonymous said...

Well, can't say I'm suprised, and thanks for digging up interior shots for us Mama. With the exception of the preponderance of white slipcovers and psychedelic wedgewood blue accent pieces, this could be any old college rental house, and in fact remindes me of the one I used to lived in. I'm so relieved I can now view some of these outrageously priced L.A./Malibu homes without leaving profoundly disturbed, having finally realized the price has little to do with actual value, and everything to do with keeping my non celebrity self from moving in next door. There goes my dream of hanging out with Britney.. cough.

Anonymous said...

Waaay tooo SHABBY CHIC for me Mama.Not a big fan of 'Bu anyways.Hideously overpriced.Useless beach.Most days only a Swede or a Canadian with no travel budget would bother to try & lay out.Ah-but fortunately for Cali real estate-the GREATER FOOL THEORY still works it's magic here.

Anonymous said...

Thanks for finding interior photos, Mama.

Yeah, it's "okay" not great and not nearly worth $16M. WTF??

David Spade isn't the most macho guy, so I'm not completely shocked at the girly interior. But geez, it's girly and just blah. White white white, would be a cute suburban cottage in Maryland or something.

Anonymous said...

Really bad,boring,bland houses are everywhere including Malibu!

Anonymous said...

I know I'm in the minority here but I like the house...inside and out. It reminds me of so many casual beachy-type houses I've stayed at here on the East Coast. Bright, cheerful and casual...suits me to a "T". Thanks for what you do Mama...it brings me great pleasure. Peace and blessings
JD

Anonymous said...

Not so much shabby chic as shi**y chic if you ask me...

Anonymous said...

The exterior is charming, and I do like the "tea house" add-on, and the Gehry-esque "metal works." But the interiors ?? Too Chic said it best. Indeed, it does look like a cross between Marie Calendar's on Wilshire and a junk shop in Laguna Beach! Now, we all know (or should know)there are any number of FAB shops along La Cienega in which great, unique furniture could be found - and an equally FAB designer, to boot!

Anonymous said...

Sure is WHITE. White on white on white.

Depends how bad you want to be on the water in Malibu.

Someone will open their wallet. The same reason people pay $400 for jeans that cost $30 (If that) to make.

Status conscious.

Anonymous said...

Actually, I like this place, and usually I can't stand all white or monochromatic places. However, the money is a bit much.

Derek said...

Never mind the price and the way it looks. The bigger question is who knew David Spade had that kind of coin ?