Monday, April 6, 2009

More Celebrity Beach Houses For Rent

Since the high cost of coastal real estate seems to stir up all sorts of righteous anger and moral indignation in the children, Your Mama wants to stir that pot a bit more by heading back to the glittery shores of Malee-boo where a number of rich and famous folks are foisting their oceanfront homes on the rental market after failing to sell them.

Last week, we mentioned unlikely Tinseltown Lothario David Spade who put a fat price tag of $65,000 per month on his crib La Costa beach which he unsuccessfully attempted to sell in the summer of 2007 for $16,000,000.
Also for lease on La Costa Beach is one of the two Malee-boo beach houses (above) owned by rock star Ozzy Osbourne and his impressively ambitious wifey Sharon which they've had on and off the market since at least March of 2006 when it was listed with an asking price of $14,000,000. The controversy courting couple, who have recently had their new variety show called Osbournes:Reloaded banned from airwaves coast to coast, did chop the asking price all the way down to $10,995,000. But alas, the three story house remained un-bought and in October of 2008 the property was put up for long term lease with an asking price of $25,000 per month.

Listing information shows the brick-built house on bizzy and cacophonous Pacific Coast Highway measures approximately 4,500 square feet with 5 bedrooms and 5 bathrooms spread over 3 floors. Vines crawl up the walls of the small and pretty front courtyard that leads to the front door which opens into the living room and dining rooms which have been done over by the Osbourne's nice gay decorator with a white on white day-core that includes white floors, white upholstered furniture, a white dining room table, white curtains and, well, you get the picture. There is a fireplace in the living room for those foggy mornings and chilly evenings and a row of three French doors open to an ocean front terrace where the never tan Osbournes probably never sunned themselves.

Behind the white dining room is a glimmering and well equipped all stainless steel kitchen that Your Mama feels quite certain would throw our sturdy-framed and despotic house gurl Svetlana into a screaming psychosis that could only be cured with six weeks of paid vacation in the Maldives.

The ocean side of the second floor is devoted entirely to the master suite which is, as expected, another study of white on white. Although the Shabby Chic meets Louis XIV (or XV or XVI whatever) day-core is not to our personal taste, we can recognize that the dark wood floors and the fireplace save the room from feeling like a damn icebox. There is also, according to listing information, a large walk in closet and a marble clad bathroom. The children will note the lace curtains behind the spa tub in the master bath which are, as y'all might imagine, an inexcusable offense to our rather delicate decorative sensibilities. Your Mama's decorating rule #691: Lace curtains are always unacceptable unless in a rural funeral home or that of a spinster shut-in whose Social Security does not afford her access to cable tee-vee or the internets where he or she could learn that lace curtains are nasty.

Also on the second floor is a paneled office/library where, much to our chagrin and dismay, the Osbournes have placed a number of exercise contraptions. We certainly understand the need for tee-vee people to stay unnaturally thin (the camera adding ten pounds and all), but we really feel a better solution for the needs of a home gym could have been come up with.

The third floor, according to listing information, is comprised of 2 ocean front bedrooms that open to a terrace where one of those horrid plug in type of hot tubs has been placed. A third bedroom/office at the front of the house offers its own not particularly peaceful private terrace with a bird's eye view of the inevitable summertime traffic snarls on the PCH.

After selling the Doheny Road house they made famous on their now defunct reality tee-vee program to make-up loving songstress Christina Aguilera in summer of 2007, Mister and Missus Osbourne decamped for the celebrity packed suburban guard gated community of Hidden Hills, CA where they reportedly plunked down around $10,000,000 for a 10,930 square foot house with a total of 6 bedrooms and 10 bathrooms.
A few miles up the beach from the Osbourne beach house is one one of the three ocean front properties owned by three time Oscar nominated actor Leonardo DiCaprio, a man whose sex appeal to the cinema going masses has never been shared or understood by Your Mama.

If the children will put on their thinking caps, they'll recall that in January of 2007, Mister DiCaprio quietly purchased a cool and contemporary house on the Encinal Bluffs area of Malee-boo for what property records reveal was $6,350,000. His other two houses are located on Carbon Beach and behind the gates of the uber-exclusive Malibu Colony where rich and famous sun their buns free of the prying eyes of paps and regular people.

For reasons entirely unknown to Your Mama or the Dr. Cooter, Mister DiCaprio flipped Encinal Bluffs property back on to the market in November of 2008 with an asking price of $8,999,000, a figure our bejeweled abacus shows was a stunningly optimistic $2,649,000 increase over what the publicity shunning actor paid for the place just about 18 months prior. After no buyer stepped up to pay that high price, the notorious ladee's man recently karate chopped the asking price to its current number of $7,999,000.

With no apparent buyers at that asking price either, in late February of 2009 Mister DiCaprio put the property out for long term lease with a monthly rent of $25,000. That number, big but not big for Malibu per se, not only buys gated privacy and stunning bluff top views of the Pacific Ocean, but a well proportioned and modestly sized 2 bedroom and 2.5 bathroom main house as well as two one-bedroom guest suites that share a kitchen and are located above the detached 4 car garage at the front of the property.

As just about everyone who cares anything about celebrity real estate already knows, Mister DiCaprio's purchased his primary residence in the Bird Street area of the Sunset Strip from Madonna which he recently finished remodeling. Additionally, Mister DiCaprio also owns the house next door to his Bird Street aerie, and reportedly purchased a New York City condo in the meant to be environmentally friendly Riverhouse building in the Battery Park neighborhood.

32 comments:

Anonymous said...

you can bet your bippy that the 3rd floor deck was NOT engineered to hold the weight of that hot tub. Fully filled, they can weigh as much as a damned Cadillac. I wonder if the Osbournes are wondering why the ceiling below is cracking?

And really?? Could the realtor not have jettisoned that exercise equipment for the photo shoot??

Anonymous said...

Complete OT - but I think Our Mama will enlighten us all on this one

9505 Lania Lane, BH - off Coldwater

first, compare Satellite modes of Google map with Yahoo map (newer)

Parcel is combined over 20 acres, the construction site is enormous - and the base was apparently 27K sq ft structure built in 2002 (according to assessor records parcel 4387-028-008)

Since Google pix shot, they've closed off and returned to natural state a portion of Tullis Dr (southern edge of property)

It looks like a mini-Getty with all the out-buildings, landscaping and terrace work

So, any idea of who? what?

Anonymous said...

Correction - didn't close off Tullis, just redoing so that they're got a turnaround in front of an guard shack being finished at corner of Lania/Tullis (go in tightest on Yahoo satellite - there's a triple gate being built, with guardhouse between it and a fountain in front of shack - guard shack looks like size of 6-car garage)

Anonymous said...

kitchen in spade's house - looks liek a photo taken at the local morgue. people should leave stainless to appliances only, c'mon celebrity designers - please.

carla in california said...

I love DiCaprio's Encinal Bluffs place.... it's perfect for me. I'm single with no kids and family can stay in the guest house(s) when they want. It's close to the water without the burden of the morning tide washing out the first floor like Broad Beach.

Understate Elegance.... spa-like bathroom.... I could live like that easily UNTIL I got the mortgage bill at the end of the month! LOL!

Too much for the size of the property and it's benefits. Lower the price down to $6.9 million. You'll recoup the expenses of the staircase from the house to the beach as well as any other improvements. As for the realtor fee, negotiate or fire them and hire a real estate attorney to handle paperwork for a fraction of the cost of a realtor.

luke220 said...

Sorry Carla, the listing contract is airtight.

Anonymous said...

Fire the realtor? And do what? Put the place on a For Sale By Owner website?

First of all I don't think there are many in this price range looking for FSBOs and secondly, I don't think Leo or Leo's assistant needs to be fielding phone calls from FSBO buyers.

Anonymous said...

9505 Lania

I remember seeing this property on the marketing back in 2007. The house is owned by real estate & hedge fund mogul Jeff Greene. He purchased the house out of a bank ordered auction in Jan of 2007. At that time the developer (Habib Construction) had not completed all the interior details on the home but it was near complete. The property auction started at $33m but sold for $35m. But seens as it wasn't complete who knows how many untold millions have been spent since.

The estate was designed by Bob Offenhauser. The estate sites on over 25 acres of land with 1/4 mile private driveway and 360 degree, canyon, city & ocean views.

The property occupies 50,000 sq ft! Main residence - 30,000 sq ft, entertainment villa - 12,000 sq ft, guest / carriage house, 8,000 sq ft.

http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_il8Um8Q4Eb8/SUNCJavzxpI/AAAAAAAADJc/6Np1FQGnTz0/s1600-h/lanialane.JPG

http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_il8Um8Q4Eb8/SUNCJEDwouI/AAAAAAAADJU/vCfz9L2WHyE/s1600-h/lanialane2.JPG

http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_il8Um8Q4Eb8/SUNCIy6tNzI/AAAAAAAADJM/wliVwl2BNxA/s1600-h/lanialane3.jpg

Anonymous said...

Speaking of Leo's Bird Street Properties,

9050 Oriole Way

The house across the street that measures only 6,000 sq ft and was reportedly featured in Entourage??? just hit the market with an vomit enducing $18,950,000 asking price. Are you Fing kidding me?

http://www.sothebyshomes.com/socal/sales/0025393

Anonymous said...

Valarie Fitzergald had 9050 Oriole Way on the market a few years back for $7,750,000 it was underconstruction at the time so who knows what they did in terms of up-grading and customizing the home but that price is a joke.

Anonymous said...

Who owns 24434 Malibu Road?

It just hit the market for $17,500,000. Awesome lokoing house! 126' on the beach, pool, spa, etc etc. Seems to be priced well compared to other active proeprties.

Anonymous said...

Why does that price have to be "vomit inducing?" What ever happened to, "I wouldn't pay that price?" or "The sellers are out of their minds?"

If home sellers get the price they're asking or successfully sell their property, are they greedy? No.

If the home doesn't sell are the owners greedy? No. It's called "not motivated."

If they were motivated they'd have the price under $14M but perhaps they'll field offers of $10M...

Anonymous said...

It's vomit inducing because it is sooo over the top.

The most expensive house in the Bird Streets ever to sell sold for $18mm and it was a 2 house compoud with over 10,000 sq ft on an acre of private land.

Thise house is located directly on the street with no yard at all! Just a rear deck area. It's 6,000 sq ft and not any higher construction than many of the other homes in the area. A similar sized and quality new construction house that was built by Ryan Brown from Flipping out sold for $10,000,000 in recent months. Another massively renovated beautiful house over at 9191 Thrasher that was nearly 9,000 sq ft sold for about $8.4m a few months back. This asking price isn't even in the right universe given market comparables.

Viva! said...

I LOVE the Osbourne Malibu beach house...brick, a courtyard, that kitchen, right on the water...HEAVEN.

It has a sense of whimsy in its design. I am honest to God in love with the place. Sharon Osbourne is lovely and no bullsh*t...she's a diva and I love her!

Anonymous said...

In my opinion this place could get a $12M offer and appraise just fine... more than that I don't think is possible.

Anonymous said...

that osborne bedroom...it's where i want to rest after my next nervous breakdown - very soothing. sweet.

Anonymous said...

Wouldn't it be grand if the Osbournes donated that fitness equipment to Leonardo? He might actually lose a chin, a moob or two.

Anonymous said...

say what you want but he still scores......he is one hot smoker and makes me want to start up again.

Anonymous said...

the osbourne's stainless steel kitchen in a BEACH house is idiotic and absurd for both stylistic and practical reasons. hopefully ozzy and the kids haven't been allowed to get in there without heavy supervision because if they have i can assure you it's all scratched up and trashed. doesn't matter that much except for showing because anybody who actually plans to use the house on a regular basis will get rid of it asap. the rest of the place is actually pretty nice.

Anonymous said...

Sharon Osbourne is the lowest form of life on earth. She would eat her young, only hers aren't very appealing. And poor Ozzy is just held together with scotch tape at this point. But without him, she'd be just another barnacle tossed out to sea...

Anonymous said...

Yes indeed. Supremely calculating and hard as nails. She'd be just another barnacle without him???? He'd be dead without her!

Anonymous said...

Clearly brain dead as is, but seemingly happy. So I would say that on balance it's best that she has saved him from himself. Regardless of what her baser intentions are.

Anonymous said...

Sharon always has such great taste I Love her! I love her even more when she beat that girl down on tv!

The Swagman said...

I like the Osbourne house, nothing too offensive though the kitchen looks a little like an autopsy room.

Anonymous said...

The Osbourne house is pleasant, the only thing odd is the gym equipment in what looks like an office/den. The DeCaprio house, it looks ok too, but I'm not sure anything about him, he doesn't strike any relevancy with me. Of course I'm 37, way over the hills.

Anonymous said...

I love Leo's house. Nothing to do with that it belongs to him, as he never even used it as a personal residence anyways. It's just a beautiful house, nice lot in a great area. Modest architectural house perfect as a vacation house without much up-keep. The separate guest quarters is amazing versus just a 4 bedroom house, all the guests visiting you at the beach are off away from you for privacy.

Anonymous said...

while some will argue that its not ideal, many malibu homes *like david spade's* have the pool on the non ocean side. leo has plenty of land at his malibu pad, id put in a gated courtyard area with pool and spa on the non ocean side. the house is too close to the cliffs to put one on the ocean side otherwise that would be first choice.

Anonymous said...

I agree with Anon 12:31. You could put a nice lap pool and spa on the non-ocean side of the DiCaprio crib. It's fairly common in Malibu for the houses on the bluffs or even not on the Bluffs to have no room on the ocean side so owners put pools on the non-water side. Even Brad Pitts $18 million crib just a stones throw to the east of Leo's pad has the swimming pool on the non-ocean side.

Joe Gillis said...

stop talking about swimming pools.....

Anonymous said...

I love the Osbourne house, they featured in on their show and on charm school, beautiful. Sharon said she bought the place with her money, she is an over the top diva and knows how to bring in the dough!!

nc said...

Beautiful House. I especially love the kitchen.

commercial real estate said...

it has a very nice surrounding..i simply like the way it is designed...:)