Friday, November 21, 2008

Leonardo DiCaprio is Flipping Out in Malee-boo

SELLER: Leonardo DeCaprio
LOCATION: Pacific Coast Highway, Malibu, CA
PRICE: $7,999,000 (reduced from $8,999,000)
SIZE: 2,374 square feet, 2 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms
DESCRIPTION: Distinctive contemporary on the bluffs above the ocean complete with new stairway to the cove below. The interior is a collection of elegant open spaces looking out to the beautiful gardens and your hot tub tucked away on the ocean front. A separate guest house containing to 1-bedroom suites. A four car garage and long winding driveway complete this beautiful estate.

YOUR MAMAS NOTES: In January of 2007 Oscar nominated actor Leonardo DiCaprio, who is soon to be reunited with his Titanic co-star Kate Winslet in the big screen adaptation of Richard Yates' stunning novel Revolutionary Road, very quietly scooped up an ocean front house riding high on the Encinal Bluffs in Malee-boo for what property records reveal was $6,350,000.

As far as Your Mama can piece together, this was Mister DiCaprio's third residence along the pricey shores of Malee-boo. Records show he owns ocean front house on one of the larger lots in the celebrity packed, guard gated and super desirable Malibu Colony as well as one of the more modest ocean front houses on Carbon Beach. So, let's be honest children, few rich and famous folks need three houses in Malee-boo so it makes sense that he would choose to sell one of them, right?

Anyhoo, thanks to the very generous and always on top of things AerialDave, we've learned that Mister DiCaprio is flipping the Encinal Bluffs property with an rather surprising asking price of $8,999,000. Your Mama's bejeweled abacus tells us that asking price computes to a staggering and perhaps optimistic price increase of $2,649,000 in less than two years.

Yes, the listing for the 2,374 square foot house does state that Mister DiCaprio installed a very long, death defying, lung busting and butt battering staircase down the treacherous and extremely high bluff to the private cove That is a wonderful improvement to the property and everything, but good lawhd children, only the most fit and intrepid beach goer who has a note from their cardiologist should be climbing up and down that insanely long flight of stairs. We could probably struggle down, but Your Mama surely knows we'd pass right out before getting back to the top.

In addition to the 2 bedrooms and 2 bathrooms in the crisply contemporary main house, the DiCaprio crib includes a detached four car garage with two 1-bedroom guest units above. Ain't nothing better in Your Mama and the Dr. Cooters book of residential real estate pluses and minuses than having not just one, but TWO guest units that ensure we are not subjected to the awful thump of late night fornicating coming from the guest room. And make no mistake puppies, your guests are gettin' bizzy on those 600 thread count Frette linens your maid stretches across the guest bed.

One of those uglee plug-in spas has been plopped onto the rear deck which probably makes for a spine tingling spot to sit and slug down a gin and tonic at sunset. But really children, a man this rich who has free and easy access to all sorts smart architects and nice gay decorators should have demanded something more from his people than just dragging the damn thing off the truck and settin' it down willy-nilly on the deck.

While we do not recommend it, a person could not swing a feral cat in the Encinal Bluffs area of Malee-boo without knocking over a celebrity. Not only does the freakishly tall and Emmy winning Brad Garrett own the house next door, Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie's modern extravaganza is just a short walk down the beach, that is if you can make it down all them damn stairs.

It's no secret that Mister DiCaprio also owns two adjacent houses on Oriole Way in the Bird Street section of the hoity toity Hollywood Hills, one of which he purchased for $2,000,000 from aging pop queen Madonna although it's now been renovated to beyond recognition of the house where Madge shacked owned the place. He probably has all sorts of other properties but, quite frankly, we've typed our fingers to the nubbins this morning and we're too damn tired to look.

44 comments:

SitDownKaren said...

Is it me or does the hot tub look like something bought at a Sam's Club? Costco perhaps?

Ivy Lane said...

Yeah, Where's the infinity pool!?? That hot tub is awful!!

Billy said...

Digging any thing larger than a hole for a 5 gallon shrub probably requires California Costal Commotion approval that close to the mean high tide line. Plus another miracle March and that twelve foot deep backyard becomes a six foot deep backyard.

outsmoker said...

Oh my.......just what percentage of the asking price is accounted for by the DiCaprio provenance? Still....he looks amazing smoking in Bloody Diamond. He is about the only celebrity left with the balls to be open about his love of cigarettes.

Sam, laurens boss said...

minor correction. leo did not buy the house from madonna, a producer purchased it and then leo purchased from the producer. then proceeded to extend and extend and block keanus view. then leo bought the old cheryl lad estate next door as it went into foreclosure but that was all along time ago, way before i bought my cliff hanger across the street and then had to buy it back or face a huge lawsuit because of the crack in the foundation that oooops, got overlooked in inspections.......... its a nice neighborhood

Sassy Cassy said...

Balls? because he smokes? besides , the package is not really well "packin" and definetly no toby mcquire or milton berle ....it is said.....

Maliboy$toyrealtor said...

Look, I think I have a buyer for this place , and I would have had the listing, if I only could have found leo, drugged him and slept with him........or his bus. mgr... or his gardner... or or or. is mr. G friends with him? can I work that angle?

Anonymous said...

Hot tubs are ugly abominations. Other than that, I like the house.

outsmoker said...

Sassy Cassy. No, not because he smokes but because he has the character strength to be open about it. This is so different from most of the Hollycrits.

Anonymous said...

I'm pretty sure one of the houses in Malibu is where his mother lives.

Anonymous said...

Mama, the Virtual Globe Trotting site says Leo also owns an estate in Bel Air where St. Cloud and Nimes intersect:

http://virtualglobetrotting.com/map/21213/view/?service=1

Barren Karen said...

nope. that's stephen and barbara bollenbach's house.

they better have money socked away or they may need to sell that monster.

i like grape jelly.

Anonymous said...

that is correct and he is the former CEO of Hilton Hotels

I highly doubt that Leo could afford to buy that estate on an actors pay

Anonymous said...

I'm not crazy about the exterior approach - kind of looks like you're walking to a dentist office, but the views of the coast are great.

The hot tub may not be much to look at, but I'm sure the view improves when you're in it - across from Leo - with cocktail in hand.....

Viva! said...

Nice house, Suzanne Somers should buy it, she hasn't rebuilt her beach house and is still leasing in Serra Retreat.

lil' gay boy said...

Sassy Cassy:

Surely you don't mean to insinuate that the only interesting bulge in his pants is his ––– *gasp* ––– wallet?

Old news, sweetie; old news.

Anonymous said...

Mr environmentalist builds an eyesore staircase down the cliff.This guy dont walk the talk.His idea of environmentalism is to buy a pristine island and then build/develop hotels on it and then call it an eco resort and book eco tours there.Always after the buck.What a himbo.

Joey said...

I really like this house!

Carla In California said...

Viva!.... Suzanne Somers hasn't rebuilt in Malibu due to the fact her insurer is AIG and was told to "hold on to that check" until the government forked over the billions to bail out the ailing insurance company. I believe it was KTLA channel 5's morning show which Suzanne Somers and a government/economic advisor spoke on air about Suzanne's situation. The look on Suzanne's face was one of devastation when the thought of having a multimillion dollar 'rubber' check had been handed to her. Evidently, she can't cash it until she has clearance to build the new beach house from the city/county/state.

As for Leo.... I can't stand him. Leo is under the impression his sh*t doesn't smell despite the fact it DOES!

daniel webster said...

I love this site. some very creative people . I will be adding the following phrases to my book.
1. are you "stuck on stupid'?
2. consumtion cunt..(think jillian barberi, and any other woman with rooms full of shoes and purses.
3.Hollycrits
4.himbo
andyes ,leo and many of the "star" are hollycrites especially when it comes to the enviroment. I like the couple that drive up in their matching prises and then board their private plane, thats like buring down a forest and replanting too small ficus trees. such waste, and most celebs are the worse..

Viva! said...

Carla in California,

Thanks for the info regarding Suzanne Somers' situation. That is just awful, I'm sure she's devastated to think that AIG is screwing her over after she paid years and years worth of insurance.

Hopefully she'll get to build her house soon, so sue me everybody, I love me some Suzanne Somers.

Anonymous said...

http://www.32628pch.com/

Anonymous said...

Fabulous place! Perfect Malibu getaway, plenty of room but not too much. Just priced atleast $1m-$1.5m over what it should be.

Anonymous said...

are you fucking kidding me ??????????


that place is really worth 500k tops

watch for the FIRE SALES when the market crashes further

7MM ???????????

not in this decade

Anonymous said...

Average Joe, stop posting as an anon.

Anonymous said...

I love this house.

I think its hideously over-priced though. I don't know in this market how far over it is, but probably he should probably be selling it for around what he paid for it.

Carla In California said...

I agree with Viva! I love Suzanne Somers too. :) After all, her company pulls in approximately 50 million a year on Home Shopping Network! (probably a little less since the downturn of the economy)

As for this beach house of Leo's.... I hate to admit it, but as a bachelorette, it's perfect for me. The price I'd pay would be closer to $5 million simply because of the location and the home is in mint/move-in condition. Far more private than Carbon Beach, which reaks of that stinky Geffen fella. Plus, Brad Garrett recently bought the house next door for over $8 million.

Despite the fact that both Leo's and Brad's properties are narrow, Leo's neighbor to the south is basically an empty lot, so privacy is key. I know Brad Pitt has a place close by as does that bar owner dude, Rande Gerber and his mole-lovin' wife Cindy What's-Her-Name?

Anon 8:32pm ... you know NOTHING about real estate so just shut up and enjoy the pics of places you can't afford to purchase.

Ivy Lane... I totally agree that an infinity pool would be an astounding asset to this property. Which one of us is going to request a permit to build one to the California Coastal Commission? :)

Anonymous said...

The houses next door both have pools, so I'm assuming its something one could do. I doubt Leo even used this house as he already has a place for himself in Malibu and a place for his mom, who knows who / what he purchased it for but I'm sure if he really bought it as his place he would have put a pool in.

Kath Day-Knight said...

If I see another unrepeatable swear word from clearly illiterate morons on this comments blog I will throw my new Louis Vuitton laptop bag at my laptop! Pleeaassee STOP the bad language. There is no excuse. Plus, you can get a reduced-price thesaurus at any good KMART. There really is no excuse. Thank you.

carla in california said...

Anon 10:40am...

I think Leo did use this house at least once. Check out the website posted in this comments section (www.32628pch.com) by Anon 5:55pm and see the picture of the bedroom. There is a family picture next to the bed. Is that Leo and his parents?

Maybe Leo used the place as a "love nest" away from his party houses in the Hills. Check it out and let me know what you think.... :)

Anonymous said...

Keith Day-night. I would listen to your shitty advice except for the fact that I saw you buying the counterfeit Louis Vitton crap on the street in NYC. Get a fucking life asswipe!

Anonymous said...

The picture you claim is Leo and his parents is in the guest bedroom, not the master. So i doubt it is.

Anonymous said...

ever since mama moved to lala land her posts, of course, have become increasingly left coast. hence, more comments from members of the left coast real estate cogniscent, los angeles subset. now i know what it must feel like for an angeleno who hasn't spent much time in new york city to read people discussing the minutia of manhattan real estate. . . the la version of this is stuff like who owns the the house at the corner of nimes and st cloud, who lives next door/down the street from discussed celebrity property, etc. however, that did remind me of something. on a trip to la some years ago, being the real estate voyeur that i am, i was exploring all the best neighborhoods. knew that ron and nancy had bought on st cloud, or rather some rich friends had bought for them on st cloud (even knew she had managed to change the address from 666 to 668!) so wanted to do a drive by there. happened to be with my african american surgeon boyfriend, who many years later still is, and he got really freaked out when i slowed down in front of the place to check it out. nothing to do with republican vs. democrat, he would have been freaked out slowing down in front of bill and hillary's place in chappaqua. you just don't do that if you are black. . . or at least then you didn't!

Anonymous said...

Reagan friends did indeed buy their house at 666 (now 668) St. Cloud but the Reagans did pay them back. They waited to unlock their fortune from their blind trust until after the market had recovered.

Anonymous said...

Brad Garrett paid like $8.8 mm for his house next door that depending upon your source is 5500-6500 sq ft.

Leo must be nuts if he thinks his house is worth $8m at 2300 sq ft.

outsmoker said...

Leo doesn't have to think it is worth so much.......he has peeps to do that for him......and to light up his Marlboros whenever he gives the signal. He is so cool but his eyes are looking kind of snakey lately it might be the smoker's squint.

Private Islands said...

Leonardo also owns a private island in Belize, Blackadore Caye.

carla in california said...

Anon 4:36pm...

"The picture you claim is Leo and his parents is in the guest bedroom, not the master. So i doubt it is."

No, I did not claim the picture was Leo and his parents, my post was,

"Is that Leo and his parents?"

There is a DIFFERENCE between a question and a statement.

And, I don't care if the bedroom is in the guest house or not, if I was the owner of the property, I'll put my family pictures anywhere I damn well please.

carla in california said...

Oh, and one more thing...

Who in their right mind places a family picture of themselves in a GUEST house as if to say they are staying longer than a day or two? That's being incredibly presumptious, don't you think, Anon 4:36? Remember, you're a guest NOT a resident.

Anonymous said...

here is what happened

"this is from an article in financial news in NY"

A stripper moves to vegas in 2002, she gets her RE lic, then she sold over 200 properties for the next few years driving up the prices in real estate in vegas,

well guess what ?

she and her mortgage broker husband were recently arrested for buying 227 homes for 107MM and the problem was that the buyers where "straw purchasers" some of homes were sold 5 times to different straw buyers"

wall street and the banks bought into the plan or at the very least looked away, (remember barrings bank of england ?)

as you can see, it was folks like her and her hubby that drove prices skyhigh and caused stars like leo and cage to think that real estate is where you could go and make a killing

here are the facts
these fantasy asking prices will be a reality in 30 years not today, not tomorrow

any property that is up now for sale is worth 10% of it's asking price, no more, no less

and that is according to todays news in NY and everyone in the financial sector is in shock

I cannot wait for the lawsuits to start

Anonymous said...

Shut up Average Joe [pretending to be anon 6:18pm].

Anonymous said...

Nice home, great location. Wake up people - its a beach house - a getaway house. This isn't your mom's 4 bedroom 2 bath in the tract subdivision.

Anonymous said...

regarding the barbara and stephen bollenbach estate where st. cloud and nimes intersect, i lived on the propery for 7 years (in the guest house). what do you wanna know. i'm serious.

Laurita said...

I dream to live in this house, very nice and very expensive