Wednesday, September 26, 2007

A Little More Real Estate Pornography


BUYER: Sol Kerzner for Beverly Kerzner
LOCATION: West 23rd Street, New York City, NY
PRICE: $8,350,000 (sale price) / monthly charges: $4,581
SIZE: 7,000 square feet (approx.), 5 bedrooms, 5.5 bathrooms
DESCRIPTION: Soaring 30ft. ceilings in the double-height living room provides the most impressive entertaining space, surrounded by enormous windows with superb light. A banquet-sized kitchen is attached to the ultra-chic dining area. A svelte, sound-proofed media room/home theater attached to a large home office leads to a 3rd-level perch over-looking the entire loft. The Master Suite features a grand bathroom with 2-person steam-room and has a room-sized closet. 3 additional bedrooms provide ample accommodations. A separate studio with bath and kitchenette is perfect for a housekeeper.

YOUR MAMAS NOTES: This morning we read with amazement and glee the comprehensive report by celebrity real estate wunderkind Max Abelson at the NY Observer about South African hotel tycoon Sol Kerzner, who developed such mega resorts and casinos as Sun City in South Africa and Atlantis in the Bahamas, purchasing a Manhattan penthouse for his daughter Beverley.

In early 2006, there were many rumors and reports that Mister Kerzner had purchased the $10,500,000 penthouse in the Phillip Johnson designed Urban Glass House for Beverley. But apparently Miss Kerzner wasn't feeling that penthouse because, as Mister Abelson reported, daddy Kerzner just spent a whopping $8,350,000 to buy his baby Beverley a massive 7,000+- square foot penthouse apartment in the Chelsea neighborhood in downtown Manhattan.

Well, we know this building and penthouse for several reasons. Number one, the penthouse is located atop the old MacBurney YMCA building on West 23rd Street that now houses, among the luxury condominiums, the sort of swanky David Barton Gym, which is widely considered the gayest gym in New york. Now children, this gymnasium certainly has it's fair number of heterosexual members, but the men's locker room, showers, and steam room is so notoriously naughty that at one point security guards were posted in the locker room in an attempt to curb the pornographic activity.

The gym also lays claim to a fair number of celebrity members including known homosexual songbird Rufus Wainwright and known heterosexual Seth Meyers from Saturday Night Live. We also hear from some one we know to be very, very reliable who belongs to the D.B. Gym, that CNN stud Anderson Cooper often works out (and showers) here. Your Mama is not saying anything, we're just saying...you can draw whatever conclusions you want.

Anyhoo, the behemoth and loft-like triplex penthouse atop the old YMCA was carved out of what was once a basketball court by a team of investors who include the design firm the Apartment. According to Mister Abelson, the investors paid $3,300,000 to purchase the raw space and another $3,000,000 to turn the place into a residence that very closely resembles a club in South Beach.

A peek a the floor plan reveals an entrance hall that overlooks the triple height living room and includes an indoor garden with grow lights for keeping the plants alive, which of course would be the perfect location for Miss Kerzner to grow weed should she be so inclined.

The massive all white kitchen is adjacent to the large dining room which the sellers have kitted out with a massive dining room table and twelve lovely white Panton chairs.

But you know what, it doesn't really matter what this apartment looks like or what furniture is there because, according to Mister Abelson's report, Miss Kerzner is planning on "keeping the kitchen and bathroom and redoing everything else." Including, Your Mama hopes, painting over that awful hot pink support column in the living room.

Back when this penthouse came on the market for $8,950,000 Your mama saved the pictures and floor plans because we were very curious as to what sort of person would buy the heavily designed apartment. Well, now we know.

18 comments:

Anonymous said...

The space itself is quite nice, from my perspective, but the interior design is too stark, too cold, couldn't live like that. But I wish my daddy would buy me such a place, so I could sell it and get something more manageable.

Aunt Mary said...

Well, it's just awful. What were they thinking?. Plexiglas stair railing, some faux wood paneling (or so it looks), puny fireplace, voile sheers everywhere. I don't get it. The volume of space just looks cavernous and not impressive. Next, please.

Virginia Girl said...

I hate everything about that place except maybe the home theater. Just ugly and cold.

Anonymous said...

This place is a tacky mess ... They've just bought it probably due to the square footage ... It's pretty cheap for the size ... In Tribeca, Soho etc... that space would be 2 or 3 times the price ... But the location sucks, the building sucks & I just hate it ... Rather spend my $8M on something smaller & more homely ... Hasn't this place bn on the market for ages & ages?

p.s - mama, anderson cooper is a member at the Time Warner Equinox ... a family member used to see him daily in there ... unless he's changed gym recently?

pch said...

What an odd floor plan. For starters, these people put the master bedroom where the kitchen/dining room belongs.

ms_wonderland said...

Yup, it's a basketball court with nasty furniture. You say some smart-ass designed this?

so_chic_darling said...

Bev LIKES to party.This place is a dream for her!

so_chic_darling said...

But I fucking hate it!

Anonymous said...

It looks awful something Jan Horn would list. He's one of the sleazer Agents who would sell anything the tacky queen.

Anonymous said...

never seen an agent refuse to list an 8 million dollar property. and they are laughing all the way to the bank with their commission check while you are....???

Anonymous said...

Anderson does indeed work out regularly at DavidBartonGym (lack of spacing is key, dontcha know). His trainer is TJ. And, yes, he showers too.

Anonymous said...

Screams nouveau riche. But then so do most of the properties posted on this site.

Anonymous said...

Keep spending your money in the USA and bring more of your friends $$$$$$$

Anonymous said...

'Anderson does indeed work out regularly at DavidBartonGym (lack of spacing is key, dontcha know). His trainer is TJ. And, yes, he showers too.'

Must have moved gyms recently - he was always at the Equinox at Time Warner then always went to Wholefoods afterwards.

Anonymous said...

I don't see 5.5 bathrooms. Are some of them portalets?

Anonymous said...

Count again; there are 5.5 baths. Yet, I can not see 7 baths in the Burkle penthouse.

Anonymous said...

Mr. Abelson is wrong on his numbers. My partner and I were in this deal and sold our unit and the purchase prices were lower. The sellers made much more money than HE thinks.

Anonymous said...

I had heard that the former owners were tyrants who held the rest of the building hostage with their unseemly parties. The building supposedly let out a cheer when it was learned that this jet-setting duo was not moving in and was looking for someone to redo the mess.