Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Anthony Clark Is Flipping Out Again

SELLER: Anthony Clark
LOCATION: Senalda Road, Los Angeles CA
PRICE: $1,995,000
SIZE: 2,574 square feet, 3 bedrooms, 4 bathrooms
DESCRIPTION: Extraordinary brand nu 2009 remodel never been lived in. 2 years in the making! The finest materials & design. Amazing residence w/ serene Costa Rica style cnyn vus. Magnif Douglas Fir hi pitch beam ceilings. Beaut ironwood, teakwood, oak, slate, & basalt accents thru-out. Dramatic black bamboo flrs. Sub-zero kitchen. Fleetwood doors. Hansgrohe fixtures. Master suite has incredible entertaining terrace & all glass window bath w/ grand steam shower. 3rd bedroom has sep entrance.

YOUR MAMAS NOTES: Back in early January Your Mama discussed a couple of California cribs being flipped by actor/comedian Anthony Clark who the children may remember from his six year spin as an excessively uptight film executive on the now canceled sit-com Yes, Dear.

We first discussed Mister Clark's Robert Byrd designed digs at the tippy-top of Outpost Drive in Los Angeles which listing information shows is still available with an asking price of $2,395,000 (reduced from $2,795,000). Mister Clark, according to listing information, would also be willing to lease the house at $7,800 per month under just about any circumstances...short term, long term, furnished or unfurnished.

The very next day we shooshed on down to lovely (if way too boho-luxe for our taste anymore) Laguna Beach where Mister Clark is selling a comely contemporary house on Coast View Drive. Listing information reveals the 3 bedroom and 3.5 bathroom dwelling was first listed nearly a year ago with an asking price of $3,289,000, a figure that has been hugely hacked to $2,495,000 and which records show is just $295,000 more than he paid for the place in April of 2004.

Recently Mister Clark flipped a third property in the celebrity packed Outpost Estates area of Los Angeles onto the market. Located on Senalda Drive and just a few doors down from Scarlett Johansson's never lived in mansion on the same street, the property is currently priced at $1,995,000 after recently receiving a substantial $200,000 price chop from its original listing price of $2,195,000.

A peep into the property records reveals that Mister Clark, one of the few out homosexual actors in Hollywood, picked up the property in June of 2007 for $1,200,000. Mister Clark spent the next couple of years fixing up the fixer upper (and it was truly a fixer children because we've seen the photos).

Listing information shows the hillside house measures 2,574 square feet and includes 3 bedrooms and 4 bathrooms, a bed to bath ratio the Dr. Cooter swoons over, but one our harsh tongued house gurl Svetlana does not feel the same way about for obvious reasons.

As do many houses in the hills above Hollywood, the front facade is set back only a few feet from the road behind a stacked stone pony wall and has been clad in lovely horizontal strips of multi-toned woods that may or may not be ironwood and/or teak. Now listen here children, Your Mama does not want to hear from all you whiners who want to prattle on about how terrible it is that this house sits close the road. For your information, there are probably about 19 cars that drive by here everyday and whether any of you rural queens or space hogs like it or not, geography often dictates that houses in the hills hug the streets on which they sit.

Anyhoo, the organic modern vibe continues on the interiors where the floors are either feel good on your feet slate or durable and environmentally friendly black bamboo. The open plan living/dining and kitchen areas share a high peaked wood ceiling and floor to ceiling windows that open to a series of not quite big enough to bbq balconies.

The horizontal motif returns in the kitchen which is wrapped in strips oak and teak (and perhaps iron wood). A complete suite of high grade stainless steel appliances have been slipped into custom oak cabinets topped with basalt counter tops. We are particularly fond of the nearly 900 pound, 2-door and 4-drawer Sub-Zero refrigerator/freeze that costs somewhere in the neighborhood of fourteen thousand dollars.

The master bedroom, located on the lower level, continues with the organic shit and features a stacked stone wall, more of that beauteous black bamboo flooring and gigantic bathroom with double sinks, a party sized steam shower and a soaking tub that sits in front of a wall of windows that slide open so that the soft scents of pine and scrub can waft in while sitting in a pool of dirty water.

Due to it's hillside perch, there really isn't much of a yard for kiddies or our long bodied bitches Linda and Beverly , but a large covered terrace has been fashioned out of what was once just the spider filled underneath part of the house. Easy maintenance Mother-in-law's tongue plants have been planted up against the house in a planting bed filled with some of those zen-ish grey stones and little green poofy plants. Although we think those paltry pillows and that little wicker table thing-a-majig are simply unacceptable as patio furniture (what grown person who doesn't contort their body with that yoga shit can get up and down off the floor like that?) we can imagine that with the proper outdoor furniture set-up, this under the house terrace would be a nice place to sip gin and tonics while reading the latest gossip glossies and watching the sun go down through the "Costa Rica like" trees that dot the slope below the house and obscure what might actually be a spectacular view if they weren't there. A less environmentally inclined person will figure out a way to send those trees to the wood chipper, but clearly Mister Clark is a tree lover.

It's unclear to Your Mama which of Mister Clark's three houses he inhabits (or if he lives in yet another property) but we presume he'll simply move to one or another when one of his three properties finally sells to someone appreciative of this renovation style. Your Mama hopes Mister Clark sells something soon–or gets a damn acting job–because just thinking about his crushing monthly carrying costs makes Your Mama shudder.

24 comments:

Anonymous said...

Must be having troubles... still is trying to unload all 3 of these places.

brian in seattle said...

Honestly Mama, what is wrong with real estate agents? There is lot's of room on the internet and no excuse for writing "brand nu."

pch said...

I like the wood trim, in theory, but there's so much of it. I can't help thinking that it would feel like living in a great big sauna.

Anonymous said...

I know this question sounds like a rube from the sticks, but how are these LA homes anchored? What happens in an earthquake? What keeps the home from careening down the hill-side or cliff side during a big shaker or just a heavy rain?

I do love the house but getting a good nights rest may be problematical.

Babe Parish said...

love.that.tub.

i don't mind so much the teeny tiny pillows and table on the patio so much as the patio itself giving off the vibe of a fancy, manicured freeway underpass.

to: Anonymous 4:20 (haha!)

many of these hillside homes are built on giant pillars that are anchored deep deep into the earth, which during a quake, would provide a "rolling" feel.

it's the mudslides you gotta watch out for.

or a pissed of mel gibson with a winch and jeep.

StPaulSnowman said...

Mama...........you had me at "grey zen-ish stones" After that I just couldn't focus. I suspect that this product is not available at Home Depot and can only be purchased at Figs and Fossils or some other decorating boutique.

thevinylvillage said...

what a cool house...a few little quirks, but very well executed. I saw that refrigetor at a kitchen shop today--the damned thing costs more than a new Hyundai.

Anonymous said...

It's a shame that the expensive kitchen appliances are illuminated by tacky, ceiling mounted 1x4 fluorescent fixtures exactly like the ones I've got in my garage. Everything else I like.

Anonymous said...

I agree about the fluorescent lights looking odd. In California, code is such that you have to put fluor. lighting in or at least a certain percentage of fluor lighting. We did compact fluor can lighting. Maybe they didn't want to cut big holes into the wood for can lights? I gotta believe that anyone who can afford that fridge can afford a more elegant lighting alternative.

Anonymous said...

I agree about the fluorescent lights looking odd. In California, code is such that you have to put fluor. lighting in or at least a certain percentage of fluor lighting. We did compact fluor can lighting. Maybe they didn't want to cut big holes into the wood for can lights? I gotta believe that anyone who can afford that fridge can afford a more elegant lighting alternative.

Anonymous said...

While I generally like the look of all that divine wood tone and stone, I can't get past the tacky look on that counter top where it was sliced out to fit around that support beam and then pieced back in. Couldn't Mr. Clark have found some suitable material that would have made those cuts less conspicuous? Probably not due to his insistence that all the materials be "sustainable" but I am as "Earth friendly" as the next guy and I'd have made some sort of compromise there (like buying up a bunch of darned carbon credits or donating to a third world sustainable rain forest deal or some such) in order to not have to stare at those cut lines in the counter top every morning when I made myself a cup of espresso or whatever...

NewYorkQueer said...

Dearest Mama
Pick Pick Pick..... seems this house is a success as no one can find anything but the smallest of details to nag on and on about.

Anonymous said...

I wouldn't wanna live everyday in this house, but I do like it.

I am a little less woodsy I guess, but this house would be amazing tucked away on a mountain as a ski house.

Anonymous said...

I couldn't agree with you more NewYorkQueer. I would bet that the majority of the posters on here live in a crappy apartment with standard out of date appliances. But, they all are experts that know what sells. The layout and flow of the house is just right for a single bachelor. The use of wood is amazing. The house looks very green and eco friendly.

Anonymous said...

8:02, I'm sure you're right about how most posters live, and I doubt anyone here would disagree with you, but that's pretty much the nature of a blog like this. People here are interested in some or all of architecture/real estate/design/celebs, and they'll comment on what they like and don't like. Just because my kitchen sucks and my house is small compared to most in my overpriced town, doesn't mean I have to like some house just because it's got a new, top line kitchen and a lot of space.

As for the house, I agree - great for a single or couple, as long as you're into that woody look. I personally like this particular house, but I'm not sure it would be my ideal in the price range.

Anonymous said...

So tell us, 802, all about your fabulous digs.

Anonymous said...

Exactly what I was thinking, PCH. Sauna.

As for the "greenwashing," puh-lease.

http://www.sciam.com/article.cfm?id=green-is-a-mirage

Anonymous said...

the one thing that gets me is the wall behind the stove. talk about sauna.

other than that i think it's great!

Rich said...

I totally agree with anonymous with regard to the tacky, $15.00 fluorescent light fixture in the kitchen. Energy saving, you bet, but juxtaposed against a $14,000 refrigerator that uses as much energy as a small house?

Stephen Parisi, REALTOR said...

My first post to this blog! Mama you're awesome. thank you!!!
The Outpost home on Senalda is gorgeous and has the most lush tropical views you could imagine. It's hillside but feels almost like being perched in a tropical rain forest. Really gorgeous and serene. the home is finished well with stone, wood and steel that is striking against the greenery and doesn't seem "flippy" at all...(maybe a bit here and there but I'm being critical). The outdoor living room is incredibly thoughtful and well designed. Would be an awesome home to live in. Great article!

Anonymous said...

yo, anonymous 8:02, mama's demographic spans a much wider audience than people that live in crappy apartments...

commentator said...

Brian in Seattle:

The CLAW/MLS that is used for Los Angeles has a seriously limited space to enter information on the home, which is where Mama usually gets these short explanations. As a result, agents have to use any kind of abbreviation no matter how ridiculous to get enough wordage in the listing. It really is something the antiquated CLAW/MLS should change.

sergal said...

Scarlett Johansson "actress"actually is a clone from original person,who has nothing with acting career.Clone was created illegally using stolen biomaterial.Original Scarlett Galabekian last name is nice, CHRISTIAN young lady.Original family didn't authorize any activity with stolen biomaterials,no matter what form it was created in,it's all need to be back to original family control in Cedars-Sinai MedicalCenter in LA.Controlling clones is US military operation.Original Scarlett never was engaged,by the way

Anonymous said...

Odd thing Sergal. No matter how many times you show up to post the exact same off topic statement about Johansson, you are the one who ends up looking like the clone - a clone of a moron.