Thursday, July 26, 2007

Fleur De Lys Photographs of the Day (Part 6)

Previously we discussed the public rooms of Fleur De Lys, including the Entrance Hall, the Silver Sitting Room, the Library and Rosegold Music Salon, the Formal Dining Room, Main Kitchen, the vaguely Medieval themed Wine Tasting Room, the funereal Screening Room, and the public room to end all public rooms, the Ballroom.

Today we go up the grand staircase to bring the children a few photographs of the private quarters of Miz Suzanne Saperstein, the owner of Fleur De Lys who has dumped her upsettingly large house on the market recently for $125,000,000, and who we have been told has a mouth like a Texas truck driver.

At the top we have the master bedroom, a room in which Your Mama could not even think of laying down to sleep without the aid of a blackout sleep mask, a high potency nerve pill, and a double dose of a powerful sleeping pill. With all due respect to the filthy rich and dee-vorced lady of this house, but Miz Saperstein, you can not really think that a gentleman suitor would want, or even be able to perform the dirty deed in a room this ornately female that includes several professionally posed photographs of your children flanking the bed.

At the lower right we see the lady's master bathroom, which has Your Mama constipated just looking at the photograph. Do we even need to discuss the back up and drama that would surely ensue if we needed to actually utilize the facilities in this bathroom?

Additionally, but not pictured, the master suite includes a sitting room with attached powder room, a kitchenette so that coffee and hot cross buns do not go cold en route from the main kitchen, a gentleman's bath and cabinet (dressing room), and of course, extensive closets for the lady, because you know, of course, that fashion mad Miz Suzanne Saperstein is one of largest consumers of high priced haute couture, a rarefied clothing world where an evening dress can easily top $50,000.

The lower left photo shows a sitting room, which we are told is a private family sitting room located on the main floor of the home. The glitzy and trashy 24 carat gold gilded moldings and accent motif has been continued here, but the overall design program here is decidedly more restrained than what we've seen in the public room. Finally, FINALLY!! we see some furniture that is actually meant to be sat upon. Please note the series of nude lady paintings on either side of the fireplace. We would find this bit of eccentricity interesting and whimsical, except somehow Your Mama is quite certain that not even a shred of irony was in play when these paintings were selected and hung.

12 comments:

Anonymous said...

The "sitting" room is actually on the 1st floor with the "Public" rooms. It is next to the morning room.
The bathroom is not THE master bath, it is HER master bath. The MR has his own.
FYI, the chairs in the bathroom are often used. The Mrs likes to have company while she is bathing. They are actually facing a fireplace. Which if I remember correctly is rose colored marble. (more of the rose/mauve theme)

Your Mama said...

Thanks doll, we are going to amend our post because we believe you know what you're talking about.

Anonymous said...

I am beginning to hate this estate more and more with every new photo that I see. I used think this property was incredible by looking at the exterior of it on various map sites, but now that I'm getting to see photos of the inside of it, it's absolutely horrible. I could never be comfortable in a place decorated like this, and I really don't see how anyone else could be either, no matter how rich and stuffy you are. Would someone hurry and buy this thing, and gut it, and start over? Please.

Anonymous said...

I am here to help :)

The sitting room is a family room. I even think there is a TV in a horrid black lacquered cabinet. Though, I can't remember anyone watching TV in there. There is also a small dining table that was used for small luncheons that the MR would have. (1 or 2 guests)

Phoenix said...

I just gotta know.. is there a gold leaf toilet seat anywhere in the house? Thankyou :)

Anonymous said...

Sorry to say, no gold leaf toilet seats.

But when I was able to give my husband a tour of the house, at least 11 of the 16 toilets were leaking. (when you have to giggle the handle to get the water to stop running) That is one of his favorite stories!

Anonymous said...

She is actually a truck driver from texas. He got a sex change in 1981 before he met the Mr.

Anonymous said...

The Sitting Room looks tolerable, though. At least you don't need sunglasses.

Anonymous said...

I dont konw if I could sleep with all that "stuff" hanging over my head, then again maybe it was used for somthing.....shg

Kimmie said...

Good GOD Mama, it gets worse and worse! The trauma from the first few photos had me out of commission for a couple of days, but now my eyes are blinded...AGAIN!

Anonymous said...

I think I need to take a laxative with my morning coffee after seeing that bathroom.

And Mama? Do you think that the truck driver would need to hire a gurl just to dust those chandeliers?

Anonymous said...

the bathroom is more of a sitting room instead of a shitting room