Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Here We Go Again...

SELLER: Britney Spears
LOCATION: Summit Circle, Beverly Hills, CA
PRICE: $7,900,000
SIZE: 7,453 square feet, 6 bedrooms, 6.5 bathrooms
DESCRIPTION: Exquisite gated Italian Renaissance Villa w/approx 7,500 sq ft of luxury, 6 BD, 6 ½ BA, wet bar, library, den, chic dining rm, & grand foyer. Artisan quality finishes, dramatic high ceilings, millwork, stone & mosaic tile floors, & iron accents. Chef’s kit w/Viking appliances & breakfast nook open to spacious great room. Romantic Master w/fireplace, & loggia. Manicured grounds incl. pool, spa, arbor, & lush landscape ideal for entertaining. Offered w/select furnishings, accessories, & art work.

YOUR MAMAS NOTES: Oh lawhd have mercy on our snarky souls children because it looks like that poor Britney Spears gurl is on the move. Again.

All the children remember that the ex-Mrs. Federline dumped $6,750,000 on her big house on Summit Circle in the guard gated community called The Summit on a lark back in January of 2007. That was back when the lamb was hanging out with all kinda hooligans, creating havoc and getting into all manner of stoopid shenanigans while wearing that dumb ass pink wig and flashing her baby smooth baby maker all over Tinseltown. Remember those days children? Good times. Good times. Ack!

The 6 bedroom and 6.5 bathroom house where Miz Spears has been holed up mending her mind the last few months has been for sale so many times at so many different prices since she scooped the place up furniture and all that Your Mama can't be bothered to count, so pleeze don't ask us to.

What we do know is that the Mediterranean-ish manse is freshly listed with a real estate agent from way out in Calabasas, so perhaps the rumors are true that Miz Spears wants to move out to some guard gated community in the northwestern 'burbs of Los Angeles where she'll have some room to roam far far far from the camera snapping and crazy making crowds on Robertston Boulevard.

Ugh. We're not even sure we care anymore. Do you?

All we know children is that someone better be burning a whole lotta sage up in that house to be getting rid of all that bad juju that's been floating around poor Miz Spears the last couple of years.

29 comments:

Parker said...

Although I think Derek Lowe's house is completely fugly, I'd much rather buy that, live in Manhattan Beach, and save $2MM rather than living in Brit Brit's House of Crazy.

TheVinylVillager said...

I suspect all the upholstery and carpets will need a good cleaning to rid them of Cheeto and Frap stains.

Well...good for her if she is getting her crazy ass back together. Hopefully she'll screw her sometimes-bald, sometimes-pink head back on straight.

StPaulSnowman said...

Doesn't anyone with money live in anything older than ten years? There must be something on the market that isn't made out of dry wall and mud.

Parker said...

Haha, stpaul, good point. Why don't they venture to Hancock Park or Los Feliz or Pasadena where the homes are old with fabulous architectual detail? Not enough flash and pizzazz, I assume.

Jesse B. said...

She looked amazing at the VMA's. After being nominated so many times without a win, it was great seeing her walk away with three moon men.

She also looks great in all of the recent pap photos.

She does appear to have gotten things back together again.

Given all of this, with the house now being on the market now, she is probably more serious about selling it this time.

Jim said...

I laugh uncontrollably every time you use "baby maker" (or variants such as "baby smooth baby maker")

Alessandra said...

I realize that the decorating isn't permanent, but does it look like someone's bubbaleh lives here? No disrespect to the grandmothers of the world, but when are the ladies getting together to play canasta and complain that their grandchildren never call or visit?

Calabasas...is that where the Will Smiths live? Are there any good clubs out there? Will the paparazzi follow her out there?

Apparently, this listing leaves me with only questions...

Brian said...

OMG. This blog is so funny.

Anonymous said...

What's with the junglegym thing in the front yard? Not surprised tho, jsut saying.

Simon said...

Perhaps she wants to move out to Hidden Hills as several celebs such as the Osbournes and Nicolette Sheridan have all bought there recently. Does seem to be a bit of a trek back to Beverly Hills tho. Mind you the neighbours at The Summit will be glad to see her go as you can't move for paparazzi at the entrance.

Anonymous said...

Are you sure it's on the market??? I cannot find it... Has anyone found it?? It's not even on CLAW MLS...

caveman said...

i agree about the house needing the sage, but don't forget the disenfectant.

Anonymous said...

its on mls, go to californiamoves.com and search the address 12094 summit.

two other houses similar size ( one ed mcmahons ) are on the market for $4.6 and $5.5 mm in the neighborhood. similar sized homes like paris hilton's and avril the spitter lavigne's old pad also sold in the $5m range in mulholland estate which is very comparable to the summit. this property seem to be priced way to high, if she realy wants to sell it she'll probably have to take a loss from the $6.75m she paid to get it to move.

also, who would wnat this house furnished? they furnishings are disgusting... house could be decent after a nice gay-de-cor-A-tor but presently is kinda just blah.

Anonymous said...

For love of god please take the nic-nac do dads off the top of the kitchen cabinets. Also, who knew there was this many shades of beige.

Anonymous said...

I wonder why she just doesn't keep the place. Like it or not; the home is in very prime location,location,location. She doesn't have to live in the home - its called a PORTFOLIO.

Anonymous said...

I don't know why you are all insulting this house, I looked at the virtual tour and I think this house is beautiful. It's a shame there isn't more of a yard for her kids, she probably wouldn't move then. I would love to live in this house, it's a dream home.

Anonymous said...

It's a nice house and it's today it's probably worth $5.5

I'm sure my friends who live in the Summit will be glad to help her move out.....If a buyer is ever found.

Nobody will miss the crazy scene outside the gates...and the helicopters flying over.

Anonymous said...

Bet the guards at the gate will miss her if she leaves, probably made a good living tipping off the Paparazzi,on her comings/goings....

Anonymous said...

^ yeah, we did!

guard #3 said...

^tons of $$$!

average joe :) said...

All I got was a free handjob one night.

Anonymous said...

I live in the Summit and I should tell you that I've never really had a problem with her living in the neighborhood. And, I don't live far away from her either, I live across the cul-de-sac. Believe it or not, she is a very quiet neighbor and I'd rather have her here than have her leave. This may sound odd but the fact of the matter is that when she is here, there are more paparazzi at the gate which deters crime from the neighborhood. What criminal would attempt to rob a house here when the area is crawling with paparazzi, someone would notice something going on. On top of that, when she was brought out of her house back last January and the helicopters were here and all the jazz. It wasn't even that big of a deal. Things like that can happen in ANY neighborhood, not just this one. There are people that need medical attention in every corner of the world, just because she's a celebrity doesn't make it any different. And, as I said before, she is a very quiet neighbor. The only time anyone sees her is when she's coming or going and when her children are visiting, she let's time ride their bikes or PowerWheels in the cul-de-sac and she, of course, supervises, not a nanny, she does it personally like a good mother would. Like I've said before, a lovely person, neighbor and mother. I hate to see her go.

Anonymous said...

You are so full of it. You live in the Summit my @$$.

First of all, I doubt a gaurd gated neighborhood in Beverly Hills has to deal with much crime to begin with. Secondly, while I don't doubt that Britney is a relatively queit neighbor( dispite paps, it's not like she's known for being a house party girl... its her home and seems low key).

The house is quite lovely, its just the decorating that needs to be changed. I agree that it's too bad the house doesn't have much yard space. I'm sure that is a major factor in the decision to move but she has chosen to get away from Beverly Hills, which is very smart for her if she indeed wants privacy and normalcy in her life.

I'm surprised that the neighborhood association allows her to keep that children's playground equipment in her front yard, I know there is no place else to put it but even my association wouldn't allow it.

Anonymous said...

First off, I am not full of shit. Secondly, yes, we do have to deal with robberies. I remember reading something a while back that a house in Beverly Park was robbed. What is keeping burglars out of the Summit if get somehow got into Beverly Park? And, the reason why they don't have a problem with her playground is because you cannot see it from the street when the gate is closed, and even if you could, who gives a shit? We aren't that uptight here.

Anonymous said...

http://www.12094summitcir.com/

Anonymous said...

Julie is that you?

Erik Freund said...

I am surprised to see her go - it would had been nice to have such a wonderful neighbor next to me or not or if that matters the most - this girl has been thru alot, and alot of heartache | glad she is getting her life back and getting on with her life - and plus the new song that is out now, absolutely love womanizer -

francis said...

As for the real estate market, it's a tale of two things right now as I see it: new listings and rentals. As I mention in my video blog for this month, most areas are starved for new inventory as the market slowly moves towards "neutral" and away from one favoring the buyers. I realize this is in stark contrast to what's going on in the rest of the country and probably in direct contrast to newspaper headlines nationwide, but it's the reality of our highly unusual market here. Good properties at attractive prices continue to sell with multiple offers, despite the 20% decline still seen for many parts of the state. Though the 'B' locations with 'A' prices continue to sit. So what do the buyers do if they can't find the right property? They drive the rental market through the roof.
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francis
Link Building

Doodle Whore said...

Sadly, I do still care. Shoot me now.