Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Russia's $99,000,000 House

The Russian stock market is having a melt down and here in the good ol' U.S. of A Wall Street is in an utter panic over the bail out brouhaha, but that's not stopping at least one mega-moneyed Russian oligarch from dropping a chomper chattering $99,000,000 on a seven-plus story townhouse in Moscow.

No children, Your Mama did not key in the wrong numbers, that's $99,000,000.

According to a recent report from the big living boys and gurls at Baller House, the approximately 14,000 square foot townhouse is part of something called the Chistie Prudy (Clean Ponds) which appears to Your Mama to be a residential complex of obscenely priced apartments and townhouses in the center of Moscow and within walking distance of the Kremlin. The townhouse is reported to contain 5 bedrooms, 5 full and 3 half bathrooms, a swimming pool in the basement, a winter garden on the roof and an entire floor for the children because, apparently, really rich Russians prefer to keep the kiddies out of the way.

The billionaire buyer has not been named but according to a Moscow real estate agent, he's a low profile tycoon who is around 40 years old.

Let's put this purchase in perspective. According to Reuters India, the average monthly income for Russians is just below $700. A few clicks of the beads on our beloved and bejeweled abacus reveals that it would take the average Russian 11,785 years to come up with the $99,000,000 to buy this house.

Now that's just sad, ain't it?

21 comments:

DWAnderson said...

Check the abacus again it's only about 141,000 years.

Catherine said...

Chistiye Prudy is a ritzy residential/boutique shopping area in the centre of Moscow. It isn't a complex, it's a whole district. Until they cleaned it up a couple of centuries ago it used to be called the Dirty Ponds. These days, very much the shiny with a slight boho twist. Kind of like Holland Park in London or the West Village in NY.

Chistiye Prudy is only walking distance from the Kremlin if you have at least an hour to spare. But oligarchs aren't big on walking.

Your Mama said...

oh hunny, you're right...it's 141,000. our trusty abacus is only as good as the gin soaked bead flipper.

thanks for correction.

Jesse B. said...

Wait, I only get just under 11,786 years...or was it a typo and the average Russian only makes $700/yr.? If it's per month, then they make $8,400 per year and $99,000,000 divided by $8,400 is 11,785.714285. Oh yes, my abacus gets down to the decimals! :)

Anonymous said...

Don't get me started on these oligarchs.

Your Mama said...

Got damn. Your Mama is a mathematical moron! Thanks darling.

Jesse B. said...

I love you Momma (man on man love to boot)! Hell, if you're already gin soaked, you might as well just keep going until you pass out. You may already be 3/4 there? :)

Anonymous said...

It all looks like a Mall in Glendale to me.

average joe :[) said...

It would take me 35,348 years to pay it off based on my current salary.

Alessandra said...

The Bellagio is prettier, and you can bet against the house.

I call tacky.

StPaulSnowman said...

House or location..........I find neither appealing.

Realty Rider said...

Bangalore will soon have a 47-floor residential tower on Residency Road targeted at India's uber-rich , with each condominium priced at anywhere between Rs 23 crore and Rs 40 crore. The residential tower, Bangalore 47, is being developed by Asipac Projects Ltd, and property developer, S.S. Kumar at an estimated price of Rs 559.75 crore. The project will have a built-up area of around 287, 000 sq ft and is expected to be ready by 2011.For more view- realtydigest.blogspot.com

Anonymous said...

I don't think either the Russians or Indians have ever spent much time worrying about the poor in their countries. Mind you the same could be said of the US of A ...........

Serge said...

life just is not fair is it ?

my grandparents taught us to be honest, non criminal and government take care of us yes ?

no

we taught opposite, be criminal, dishonest and now we are rich money is our god

and what is 100MM ? it is nothing because common people pay for it

ha ha ha ha !!!!!!!

who says we are all equal ?

Jimmy said...

Less assume a "western" style analysis: $99M - 20% = $19.8M and a mortgage of 79.2M at 6% gives a monthly payment of $474.844.02. And this is before the usual overhead on such a place.

Nice if you can do it.

Daniel C. Olson said...

Hey, like the blog a lot... Interesting info on the real estate thats changing hands! Keep up the good work!

Sandpiper said...

Looks like the designers went ape-sh*t with the Sweets Catalog (bible for building products).

It's a fluster-cluck of faux opulence and bad decisions. Mama, please hand me the pencil. Thank you.

so_chic_darling said...

Looks like rich Russians like to live in a sort of faux Trump meets Tommy Bahama fantasy spa, if it wasn't so tragic on so many levels it would be funny.
Oh and Miss Bangalore we just don't care buy an ad in the Times of India or something and Jimmy put down the bottle of Jack Daniel's, there are no mortgages in Russia, it's all cash all the time!

lil' gay boy said...

Funny, So_Chic, I immediately thought I was looking at retouched photos of Plato's Retreat.

Now Mama's got me wondering about "…big living boys and gurls at Baller House…"

Sounds like the kind of place I could really get behind…

;-)

Anonymous said...

Russia's average yearly income is 15,000 USD and the large cities such as Moscow and St.Petersburg is around 30,000 USD ;) my sources are having business there and CIA world fact book.

Anonymous said...

Unlivable showpiece.