Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Tony Danza's Golden Extravaganza

SELLER: Tony Danza
LOCATION: Longridge Avenue, Sherman Oaks, CA
PRICE: $6,150,000
SIZE: 6,778 square feet, 5 bedrooms, 5.5 bathrooms
DESCRIPTION: Truly the Crown Jewel of Sherman Oaks! Stately Cape Cod traditional perched on a knoll & sited on 2.3 acres in sought after Longridge Estates. Completely rebuilt from the ground up in1997. Impeccable attention to detail, far too many amenities to list here. Very private, gated property includes guest house, pool/spa, pool house gym. Tennis court & batting cage. Perfect for the most discriminating of buyers seeking privacy.

YOUR MAMAS NOTES: Recently we received word from Scuttlebutt Sam, a San Fernando Valley denizen who pointed Your Mama at a Sherman Oaks listing the belongs to Mister Tony Danza. Remember him kids?

Just because we don't care for his right leaning politics, does not mean we would wish lunky and hunky Republican actor Tony Danza's house be knocked over in an earthquake. Which is exactly what happened in 1994 during the devastating Northridge Earthquake. Well, Your Mama doesn't know if the place actually fell over, but multiple sources report that the Sherman Oaks house he bought from actor Robert Urich in September 1986 for $1,556,180 was indeed destroyed. What a damn drag that must have been.

According to listing information, the house was rebuilt from the ground up in 1997, which we imagine was necessitated by the severe earthquake damage. An article from the late 1990s reported that he claims to have rebuilt the house to ve virtually earthquake proof and he was quoted saying, "In an earthquake, I shouldn't run out of the house–I should run into it." Your Mama does not know where Mister Danza and his family lived from 1994 to 1997, but perhaps it was up with gun toting Republican Charleton Heston in his colossal contemporary crib off of Mulholland Drive. Now babies, we don't have any proof of that Mister Danza and scary Mister Heston know each other at all, so don't go spouting any of that shit off to yer friends.

Mister Tony Danza, who became famous, and probably rich, playing a series of dumb guys named Tony in the 1970s and 80s (Taxi, Who's The Boss?), has recently become a thespian with his recent run on Broadway as Max Bialystock in The Producers. A wee bit of research on the internets tells us that he's continuing that role at Paris Las Vegas, which Your Mama presumes is one of those disturbing and flashy fantasyland casino hotels in Las Vegas where thousands upon millions of numb skulls smile and laugh and open their wallets and bank accounts for all the fat-cat casino owners to reach in and steal their hard earned middle class income that would be better off spent taking their children to museums. But that's a gripe for another day and another blog.

Anyhoo, Mister Danza has recently put his big and rebuilt Sherman Oaks estate on the market for a surprisingly high $6,150,000. According to listing information and property records, the 6,778 square foot "Cape Cod" style residence sits on a private 2.3 acre parcel in desirable Longridge Estates. Your Mama does not care how desirable Longridge Estates is, $6,150,000 for a house in Sherman Oaks seems ludicrous. All you San Fernando Valleyites simmer down. Your Mama is not knocking Sherman Oaks. We know that the quintessential suburban city is full of famous and well to do people living in lovely and expensive homes. But it ain't no Beverly Hills. Food for thought, the next most expensive Sherman Oaks house listed on the MLS is just four doors down from the Danza extravaganza, and it's priced at $3,750,000.

Listing information shows the family friendly property includes a gym in the pool house (the better to help middle aged Mister Danza keep his chest bulging and young looking), a guest house (always a nice feature for stashing the inlaws), swimming pool and spa (note the old school slide and diving board which must have survived the quake), tennis court, and a batting cage. Batting cage? How macho.

Inside the "Cape Cod" style house, which looks suspiciously un-Cape Cod like to Your Mama, we find a house bathed in gold fabric. We see gold sofas in the formal living room, a whole army of gold chairs standing around the dining room table, beige-y/gold colored furniture in the family room for watching Taxi reruns, honey gold colored butcher block counter tops in the kitchen. Gold, gold, gold! We did not manage to locate any photos of the master bedroom, but Your Mama would bet one of our long bodied bitches Linda or Beverly that there's a gold sateen duvet on the bed and dee-luxe gold terry cloth towels in the bathroom.

Despite the overdone gold color scheme, the 5 bedroom and 5.5 bathroom mansion still manages to look like a cozy family style home...like a place where people actually live. Not a place Your Mama and the Dr. Cooter would want to live, but a place that real people actually live. So while the sad little wet bar in the family room makes Your Mama depressed and we have an unpleasant and inexplicable desire to know what that gold fabric on the dining room chairs feels like on our nekkid and prodigious booty, we give the Danza clan props for living in a house that does not look like an obscene decorator show house or a completely generic hotel room at a second tier Four Seasons Hotel.

However, one note about the backyard fencing, railing and chain link. All those ticky tacky barriers gives the place a white collar jail vibe, which isn't so good for getting well over 5,000,000 clams out of a super rich Sherman Oaks buyer. Surely a well paid landscape designer could come up with a better solution.

Your Mama wishes the Danza clan all the luck in the world unloading their rebuilt Sherman Oaks dream house. We think you're going to need it at it current asking price.

UPDATE: Well, it does appear that the Danza's have split. While we can find no indication that the soon to be ex-Mrs. Danza bought a house in Fryman Estates as was noted in the comments section, that does not mean she didn't, just that we cain't find it with our weary eyes and tarhd mind. However, property records do reveal that the erstwhile couple do own a 1,349 square foot 2 bedroom and 2 bathroom ocean front house on Malibu Road in, well, in Malee-boo of course.

15 comments:

Anonymous said...

He should ask 65MM for it, I mean if he is willing to wait it out that long why not ? He will have the same chance of selling it at 6.5 or 65MM.

All of these sellers esp the celebrities seem to think that it is still a sellers market times 100.

Anonymous said...

Where is Tony Danza going to live now? I didn't even know about this house. I thought he still lived in Tarzana at an address I have had for him for a long time.

Aunt Mary said...

Comfy looking and family friendly. But snooping around I see nary a book. Maybe there's a well stocked library around the corner. I'm not saying I expected to see books. But it's telling. I just read an article in the New Yorker about Karl Lagerfeld. He gave the reporter a tour of his Paris home apologizing all the time for the stacks and piles of books, magazines and newspapers. (And ipods laying all over the place like confetti) There was a plastic sack filled with unread newspapers near his reading chair and he explained that he couldn't throw them out yet, they haven't been read! Oh, Karl, where were you when I was looking for a husband. I love you! Is it too late for me? Anyway, what I mean to say is you can only swim, play tennis, work out for so long. What about the brain?

caveman said...

read? what, is his tv broke?

Anonymous said...

Hideous interior, hideous landscaping...but he was on "Who's the Boss?" so I'll forgive him. The price though? Poor Tony, he'll be lucky if he gets $4 million.

Anonymous said...

the details:

danza and his wife are getting a divorce. several months ago danza bought a home in the fryman canyon area of studio city, which i believe is going to the former mrs. tony danza.

so_chic_darling said...

What about the dreadful baskets in the kitchen,did he keep them from the gift baskets that some studio sent over?I hate baskets what is the point?

Anonymous said...

So distracted. Pepole won't see the bones of this fine traditional home. Really, I can, but surely, many won't. Dire need to stage and/or rearrange, delete clutter, inject a few large and seemingly-important pieces of art; punch up monochromatic golds with strategic spot color; inject some edgy eclectic elements. I don’t care. Pleeze, just do something.

Groom front trees, loose pool hose, soften retaining walls with paint, splash color via container gardens.

In fact, rethink the shots and crop judgements completely. Comps in this area demand it. ROI.

Okay … that said, I’m back to crocheting The Mama’s afghan

Anonymous said...

this isnt tony danzas house. my best friend lives next door to tony and ive talked to him a few times. he lives up the street in a mediteranian house. his ex wife bought a house in fryman canyon, but hes keeping the one on longridge.

Anonymous said...

also, (continued from the above post), the tracy bought is my other friends house (or was until she bought it this summer for 2.7 million). its on an acre on ashdale lane in studio city. Tony's house is set back from the street on five acres. it has a tennis court and the back of the house has an ugly overhang. its 10 houses up and across the street from the one that is in these pictures.

Your Mama said...

With all due respect. Property records on file with the LA County Assessor (and elsewhere) show the address and property of the house pictured here is owned in the name of both Tony and Tracy Danza, which is a pretty clear indication they own this house. Property records do not show the Danza's owning any other property on Longridge. The only Mediterranean style house on a large parcel is owned by someone in their own name, and it's not the Danzas.

We've been wrong before, but we're quite certain this is the home of the apparently erstwhile Danza couple.

Anonymous said...

http://wibiti.com/HomePage.aspx?v=v&b=0&f=pm&popup=true&HpID=%C2%B9%5B%5C%E2%80%9A%E2%80%9A

tracey danza's new house (sold for 2.7 in august)

Linda Hoof said...

Oh my god the baskets,it looks like somebody died in hospital and they took the baskets home.

dani said...

this house is gorgeous. The layout and frame work is spacious and grand, and the decorations inside are classy and charming. The house has a tennis court over a pool, come on. Its just the right size and design for a family to really get cozy in. I can just imagine waking up, coming downstairs, eating cereal at the bar, with my kid sister watching TV and brother outside by the pool. You'd be lucky to have this home!

karenandcollies@juno.com said...

Celebrities seem to draw the attention of people who have done nothing with their lives. Instead of spending time improving themselves, they knock the people who have lived to the fullest completing their dreams.
This man is successful, talented has brought great entertainment and laughs and inspiration into so many lives with his "be the best you can be " attitude. Who cares about some of these petty things? Let him live his life in privacy please.