Friday, March 13, 2009

A Couple Of Design Queens Sell A Small House.

SELLERS: A couple of design queens named Josh and Raphael
LOCATION: Udell Court, Los Angeles, CA
PRICE: $767,000
SIZE: 1,080 square feet, 2 bedrooms, 1 bathroom
DESCRIPTION: Tastefully renovated, this designer-owned and published modern Hamptons beach house in the Franklin Hills is tucked away on a cul-de-sac yet very near Sunset Junction, Trader Joe's and Gelson's. This enchanted home includes two bedrooms with an office or third bedroom, one bathroom, and a detached studio. Skylights and French windows throughout the house bring in lots of natural light. A fully enclosed backyard with mature landscaping and views is perfect for pets and everyone to enjoy.

YOUR MAMAS NOTES: Your Mama has become a bit weary of looking at super-sized celebrity homes that are too big, too decorated and too expensive for most people to even fantasize about, so this afternoon we're going to do something a little bit different and look at a wee house in the Franklin Hills area of Los Angeles that is listed for sale (and appears to be in escrow) with an asking price of $767,000.

Property records reveal the teeny-tiny cottage was purchased in July of 2006 for $636,000 by Emmy winning visual effects designer Joshua Rose and his Chinese medicine practicing man-mate Raphael Kalichstein. At the time, the good looking design queens purchased the house on Udell Court, it was a serious fixer that only a nice gay decorator could appreciate. If you don't believe Your Mama, head over to the dee-lightful and always informative Apartment Therapy who featured before and after photos of the house way back in July of 2007.

Records show the house measures a pint-sized 1,080 square feet and listing information indicates there are just 2 bedrooms and 1 bathroom. In addition to the decent sized living room and the wonky shaped and sky lit dining room, the house includes a kitchen with cabinets painted a striking shade of green, and an office separated from the living room with a set of French doors that have been given a nifty navy blue and black paint treatment. Somewhere on the property, maybe in the house or maybe in some sort of detached shed-like structure, is Mister Kalichstein's treatment room which features a high ceiling, a wood floor and some built in cabinetry.

Now, before you children go ripping this place to shreds, keep in mind that these two gentlemen get paid to decorate other people's homes and just because it may not be your taste, does not mean it's not in good taste. The comely couple operate a small interior design firm called FORM based on the idea that working with an interior designer should not be a luxury for only the rich and ought to be affordable to folks with modest bank accounts.

For what it's worth, we happen to think these two decorating dynamos can really do a room over without overdoing a room. Your Mama and the Dr. Cooter both like the white walls set against the dark window frames which are enhanced by the brightly colored furniture, accessories and knick-knacks. It is our humble and utterly meaningless opinion that Mister Rose and Mister Kalichstein have successfully transformed the interior spaces of an architecturally lackluster house with wonky exterior articulation into a contemporary home filled with light and color that does not look too precious to actually live in or like it's adhering to any particular "school" of interior day-core.

That we think that will come as no surprise to anyone who was ever in Your Mama and the Dr. Cooter's weekend house which we no longer own but had a very similar (if a little less glossy) day-core. In fact, their kitchen is much like our kitchen except where they've got green, we had a very bright yellow. We don't know if the new owners kept the color, but if they did not, we do not want to know because it was gorgeous.

Given that this couple clearly spent a few buck rehabbing this residence it does not look like they're going to pocket much in the way of profit. None the less, Your Mama hopes they're on to bigger and better digs where they'll have bit more room to exercise and stretch their design ideas.

57 comments:

Anonymous said...

oh baby I love the massage table.........

Anonymous said...

The only thing I can say that I don't like/understand is the exterior trim. While the black on light gray is classic, the white windows make me feel like cheap new windows were just installed.

However, I am not saying that is the case with this house. Like I said, I just don't understand it, which doesn't mean there isn't a perfectly good stylistic reason for it. If anyone would like to enlighten me, please do so.

Anonymous said...

Nice work, Mama. It's refreshing to see "real" homes once in a while. I think it's overpriced but it has it's charm. A one bathroom is always a hard sell. But, as I said, I think the children have had their fill of mega mansions after that Beverly Park buffet!

Anonymous said...

"SELLERS: A couple of design queens named Josh and Raphael"

I love my Mama. :-)

Anonymous said...

$800,000, really???

This is like the size of a kids tree house?

Anonymous said...

I would rather pay too high a price for designer provenance than for celebrity provenance. I would be anxious about the "beige" on the massage table.

Anonymous said...

I would want a built in stove/oven for that price. Not a cheap free standing range that they currently have. Does not go with everything else.

I think they like the color green!

Anonymous said...

Why did the OC housewife post go up and then disappear? Hmmm. Intriguing.

StPaulSnowman said...

I was wondering about that as well but I am sure Mama has her reasons. I am guessing Dr. C. thought the place was unworthy of Mama's consideration.

Viva! said...

A total hideosity.

ms_wonderland said...

Adorable. That clash of greens in the kitchen jars for me, it needs to either match or properly contrast. Maybe these nice boys are a little colour blind in the greens?

Anonymous said...

There was an OC Housewife post I missed? Dang! I happened to be in one of their neighborhoods this week on business and drove by one of their homes on a lark...wow, things really do look better on TV. Of course, just my foolish humble opinion.

Anonymous said...

Colorwise, this looks like something a 5 year old would put together. Yuck! I'm thinking Mama must be smitten with these queens, as there was no mention of the hung-too-high lighting fixture over the dining table.

Red Chipped Polish said...

Love the green cabinets and the mountain feel!

Anonymous said...

Two words -


"In Escrow"

thevinylvillage said...

those queens certainly had more vision than I...I skipped over to the Apartment Therapy page to see the befores...and only two words can describe the before: FUG-LEE.

On the portfolio on the FORM site, there appears to be a childs room in this house? Are these queens daddies?

And they ARE handsome, mama. Josh doesnt so much tick my clock, but Ive got a thing or two that Rafi could do up and do over.

Canvas Printing said...

Nice play with colors. The green really pops out. The red door is a nice contrast as well.

thevinylvillage said...

a quick google of the Chinese medicine man turned up his website.

I hope mama doesnt mind if I share the eye candy...I mean... therapeutical information:

http://www.archangelhealingarts.com

Lucy said...

While I love traditional colors and furnishings, I do appreciate those who love bright colors and choose to live in them. I've always wished I had the nerve to paint something a bright, primary color- besides one of my children's rooms, that is....maybe that's why my boys love orange and bright green and screaming red...

PS...Mama, I'm visiting my parents in Florida, and I'm STUNNED at the drop in home prices. A couple of years ago I couldn't have dreamed (well, I could have dreamed) of buying a home in my parent's neighborhood, and now I could pick up a house on the beach for less than a million. Of course, my parents bought their home in '69 for $14K....

angeleyes said...

I think they did the house up CUTE, but it's one of those I'd enjoy visting rather than living in. Having to live day in and out with the overall visual impact of the black on white theme amidst all those colors would be too jarring a decor for my sanctuary, which is what I consider my home. I love color, but not to a degree that items within a room compete for my attention rather than draw my attention. Very nice change of pace Mama!

Babe Parish said...

sharp as a tack!

Anonymous said...

UGLY!!!!!and more!!!!!!

That is why this super dooper design team lost money on this labor of love. White windows clash with everything else on the outside and stand out, bad exterior choices of color.

Interior, went sort of modernish with this traditional home, it's like putting Nancy Reagan in sweatpants that say "juicy". The whole cheap modern makeover with the Ikea type cabinets isn't refurbishing this house to former glory. On the same token it's like making a famous modern case study home over in shaby chic or craftsman---does not fit with the house, but some designers want to "break the mold". Oh well, the asking price tells it all.

Hopefully, this design duo will do oh better next time. This one is BORING, BLAND, and PREDICTABLY CHEAP looking.

This is a traditional. White interiors don't work either. This just hammers down the point to me that some/most of the best homes (I have ever seen) are done by people who don't design "professionally", and plan to live in the home for many years, not flip.

Sorry, "hated it" as Men on Film would say.

Mama's black sheep
The gloves came off.

Anonymous said...

Oh, correction: Nancy Reagan wearing sweatpants that say "juicy" on the but. One more thing, that cow skull way up on the wall and that little ass stupid light fixture over the desk. This house burns my eyes..I could only look for a few seconds at a time. Mama, do you own stock in this design firm?? But, on the same token good thing all us children like something different--so we can all have a place to lay our head.

Mama's black sheep in WEHO

LaAnon said...

i love the skull and thought cool now who ever would think of that. green couch scares me but furniture goes with owners.

Anonymous said...

Hey you can be a "design queen" too. Just get a can of green, a can of red and a can of black paint and go for it.

Anonymous said...

I do love soffits in a kitchen and this one kept them. I'd be tempted to paint the inside panes of the cabinets, though. I love my china, but I don't want to look at it all the time.

The front door is adorable and it looks like the sides of that bay window actually crank open. That stair rail is a surprise, but I think it works. My shack needs a railing out front and this one is an inspiration.

I am in Flyover country, so the lack of gutters annoys me - a drip line fucks with irises and peonies and does nasty things to your basement walls. I'll bet LA is different.

I love the dark trim on the door frames, but having tried that myself I can tell you they are a bitch to keep dust-free.

Anonymous said...

This is hideous.

The cobblers children have no shoes.

Anonymous said...

On the other hand, Mama, just because it isn't my taste doesn't mean it's in good taste. Not that it's tacky--just seems as though children decorated this place. And the living room looks chilly and uncomfortable--Ikea showroom comes to mind. I can certainly see where the "modest bank accounts" comes in. Sniff sniff.

Anonymous said...

On the other hand, Mama, just because it isn't my taste doesn't mean it's in good taste. Not that it's tacky--just seems as though children decorated this place. And the living room looks chilly and uncomfortable--Ikea showroom comes to mind. I can certainly see where the "modest bank accounts" comes in. Sniff sniff.

Anonymous said...

Egads!!
What is with the green kitchen cupboards? Pleeease. One would think that 2 queens had better taste.

Alessandra said...

I love the green kitchen cupboards and not much else. I also like the concept of FORM. But the other photos are leaving me sort of cold...

Sandpiper said...

Mama, thanks for the nice treat. This home is well appointed and thoughtfully planned. I love the studied yet whimsical palette of colors, textures and shapes. I get it.

Anonymous said...

They need to go back to design school. Hideous! Over-priced!

Anonymous said...

Can I set this "house" alight?

Anonymous said...

I love the used condoms on the bedroom floor blah blah

Anonymous said...

I love the used condoms on the bedroom floor blah blah

pch said...

Has a cheap-and-cheerful vibe I can appreciate without wanting for myself.

That weird horizontal row of windows under the gable, almost colliding with the bay window, is killing me, though.

blackberry said...

This home is perfect. It's beautiful and I love it.

Anonymous said...

It's not perfect, but it's a good example of working with what you have and with a budget. Not everyone has the money to re-do every inch of a place to make it perfect.

I love the primary colors.

Anonymous said...

Mama, are you showing us this house because you and the good Dr. are the potential buyers who have it in escrow? Just a thougth!

Anonymous said...

Awful. Just awful.

Anonymous said...

The design queens obviously have a bit of talent. The home is nice, simply and clean, yet elegant. It seems that design queens have a natural ability.



Simple,Unique, Creative and Green House Plans
Spreading the word on great home design

Anonymous said...

yes, these design queens have a teeny tiny itsy bitsy bit of talent. But it isn't for serious decorating.

Anonymous said...

Ugh..so ugly. I really hate it.

Anonymous said...

Hey Mama, no one said you could take the weekend off. Do your job.

Anonymous said...

Agree w/Anon 6:58 AM. It's not decorated, it's merely furnished.

Anonymous said...

ms_wonderland, you are right, those greens in the kitchen are jarring. They should match exactly or be distinctly different. Being close-but-no-cigar is just disturbing.

Anonymous said...

9:09 - Are you sending Mama a paycheck? No? Then you have no say over whether Our Mama takes the weekend off.

Anonymous said...

Mama's chillen's must all be teenagers--because they are bad as hell lately.

Maybe the black sheep can come home, just show me a *nice* house so I can agree with my Mama--who has a soft spot for Modern--good modern or Ikea. Just leave out the pot rack, fake greenery, and let me think....

Mama's black sheep in WEHO,
Coming home??

Anonymous said...

This was open today (looking for backup offers in case the accepted one falls through). It's a nice little house.

Selma Babiesforcrack said...

Oooww I lurves me dis house. I cud saves me sum monye at da RizCarlton wif dat lil room wif da ma-sauge table. I need a bigga one thou. Ima big gurl an' my johns be gettin' sum motjon if no whadda means.

Hippie Canyon said...

Aside from the green - would you say Kelly Green? - the interior design is both quaint and hip. Edging toward my own style, actually. And I am surprised and pleased to see such an average home on this site. I'm way over the whole 16K SF diatribe of late. This is, well, refreshing.

Never heard of FORM, but I can assure you I will be calling Rafael to arrange for a deep tissue Swedish massage (Akkurat gjør det)and some Chinese herbs 感觉很好. We'll see what kind of form we can take!

Anonymous said...

Mister Kalichstein can come redecorte for me anytime -- what a hottie!

http://www.archangelhealingarts.com

Monicais said...

I agree, I like a "real" house every once in awhile for my poor ass to dream about, keep them coming!

Anonymous said...

Let's re-read your Big Disclaimer and WhatNot: "The Real Estalker provides information about high-end and celebrity real estate with a little gossip tossed in for fun." This post is anything but...

Anonymous said...

the house looks bad

Anonymous said...

And somebody paid 745K for this mess. WTF? Those design queens must also have be hypnotists. The house next store sold 6 months ago for 100K less and it was nicer, larger, renovated and had an extra bathroom. My oh my.