Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Does Kenny Chesney Have Island Fever?

BUYER: Kenny Chesney
LOCATION: Caroline Street, Key West, FL
PRICE: $5,700,000
SIZE: 6,888 square feet, 5 bedrooms, 7 full and 1 half bathroom
DESCRIPTION: ...Stately and elegant, the 5 bedroom, seven and one-half bath house has high peaked Gothic style roof over classical Revival portico and four graciously arched bays. The beautiful arched front door is distinctive and rare in Key West...Large rooms, 13' ceilings, elegant moldings and hardware, formal living and dining rooms, custom designed 1500 bottle wine room, an outstanding kitchen equipped with all gourmet appliances, Carrara marble counter tops and in-kitchen dining.

YOUR MAMAS NOTES: Okay babies, Your Mama is going to pass along some unsubstantiated celebrity real estate gossip here. We don't normally do this sort of thing, but besides the not so surprising news that security conscious stay at home mommy Jennifer Lopez and her frighteningly skinny salsa singer huzband Marc Anthony bought the house next door to their Brookville, NY estate, the pickins are somewhat slim this morning. So we're going with what we got and we ask that the children keep in mind this information is not yet verified with property records and suggest that if you're going to go around trying to impress your friends with all your celebrity real estate knowledge you best qualify this one as rumor. You got that children? Rue-mer. At least for now. Now then...

Although Kenny Chesney, the diminutive country music crooning superstar, has yet to unload the seven and some million dollar property he bought last year in Malee-boo, CA and just two days later flipped back on the market with a stunning $550,000 increase over what he paid, Your Mama hears from Fanny the Floridian (among others) that the award winning singer/songwriter recently closed on an historic house in Key West, Florida. Your Mama's tipsters all swear on their little sisters' navel rings that Mister Chesney purchased a lavishly renovated property on Caroline Street that is generally referred to as the W. Hunt Harris House. We aren't the only folks who think this neither.

However, before we get to discussing the big ol' house down in Margaritaville, Your Mama has a bone to pick with Mister Chesney regarding his incessant hat wearing. Listen buddy, we all know yer bald under that thing. And despite your (and your handlers) misgivings about it, there ain't nuthin' wrong with bald. In fact, bald can be hot. It's the pretending yer not bald that's not so hot. (Just so y'all know, we are not being defensive due to any follicular issues on our part. Your Mama and the Dr. Cooter both have full heads of hair.)

Anyhoo, property records Your Mama accessed do show that the house in question did indeed transfer ownership in mid-January, 2008. Records show the previous owners received $5,700,000 from the new owner. That's a lot of money for an island hideaway but it's not nearly the $6,495,000 listing information shows the sellers were asking for the property.

Listing information shows the fully renovated and restored W. Hunt Harris House measures 6,888 square feet and includes five bedrooms and 7.5 bathrooms. For those not schooled on the historical who's who of Key West (and why would you be?), back in the late 1800s Mister Hunt Harris married into one of the first and most prominent families to settle in Key West and proceeded to build himself house which was completed in 1898. At least that's the 411 on Mister Hunt that appears in the property's listing.

The front façade somehow manages to remain dignified even though it is a thorough melange of Southern Antebellum, Greek Revival and Gothic architectural styles mixed with classic Key West features like the arched front door that leads to a narrow buttercup yellow entrance hall.

The main floor, with stately 13 foot ceilings, includes a formal living room that due to its current shockingly bright coral colored paint job screams, "Look at me! NO! ME! Not the dining room, ME!" Other punishable decorative offenses in the living room include upsetting gold colored swagged curtains, a couple of floral printed swooping settees and a cheap-ass looking ceiling fan. Don't nobody misunderstand Your Mama here because we think this house is a gorgeous example of modern day Key West living–if you're a couple of middle aged, empty nesting, heterosexual multi-millionaires–and we totally respect the sellers sensitive and comprehensive restoration of the historic house, but that retina burning coral colored living room set up has got to go.

The dining room, painted the palest shade of baby blue Your Mama has ever seen, features a glittery crystal chandelier and an unfortunately off-center fireplace. Listing information reveals the adjacent wine room holds 1,500 bottles of booze and has its own generator ensuring that when a hurricane takes the power out (and you know it will), the vino stays at a perfect temperature.

The kitchen is large enough for two cookers to maneuver comfortably, has a mix of Carrara marble and wood counter tops which may or may not be teak. Naturally it's nearly impossible for Your Mama look past the monolithic and menacing pot rack without cringing but when we do we spy something for more upsetting than a pot rack. That would be, of course, that stoopid stuffed parrot hanging in the window. Have mercy.

Beyond the kitchen is a breakfast area as well as a window wrapped family room with shiny wood floors, a truckload of white furniture and few more of the same cheap looking ceiling fans we found in the living room. Okay, what's with the cheap looking ceiling fans? We recognize that fans are fantastic for moving the hoo-mid Key West air around and it's obvious this place was not done over on a dime, so can someone please explain these uglee ass fans that look like someone bought them in bulk at a Home Despot clearance sale?

Located on the second floor of the main house, the master bedroom features a large bedroom with a coal burning fireplace (coal?) and some kinda crazy fabric treatment behind the bed, a separate dressing room, a mini-kitchen for late night ice cream snacks, a private balcony that runs the width of the house and is only accessible through the master bedroom and a Carrara marble clad bathroom that successfully manages to merge Old World with new fangled and, perhaps best of all, has a shower built for two.

A guest suite completes the second floor and offers a sitting room, steam shower, walk in closet and private balcony. All that sounds perfectly lovely, but Your Mama fears that with a dee-luxe guest room like guests will never pack up their toiletries and leave. The third floor provides an office area and two more bedrooms with en suite terlits.

The back yard, lush with verdant and steroidal tropical greenery, includes a 42 foot long swimming pool with brick terracing and a commodious wood floored pavilion with a high peaked ceiling that is set up for outdoor entertaining and late afternoon tabloid reading. The guest house/pool cabana, located at the far end of the swimming pool, has been built to withstand a category 5 hurricane, so you know where Your Mama and the Dr. Cooter would be holed up with our menagerie when the wind starts a-blowing. The lower floor of the cabana thing is comprised of a gym space with retractable glass walls where Mister Chesney can do his Bikram yoga in the shaded but open air, an attached full bathroom and an outdoor shower (love that!), custom cabinetry with built in desk and a washer and dryer which means, of course, that no stinky work out wear ever need enter the main house. Upstairs, the fifth bedroom suite offers over night guests (or staff) a morning kitchen, entertainment area (whatever that means) and a private balcony.

As far as we know, Mister Chesney continues to make his primary home in a big Cape Cod style mansion that sits on a 48 and some acre farm in Franklin, TN and which records show he picked up in September of 2003 for $2,500,000. And, of course, there's also that house on Carbon Mesa Road in Malee-boo which he was unable to sell last year and which records show he still owns and appears to have been taken off the open market.

37 comments:

Anonymous said...

It's ironic that Chesney, who is rumored to be gay, is buying a house in Key West. He could have maybe pulled of South Beach, but not Ft. Lauderdale or Key West with the questions swirling around him. Are you going to next report that he's buying a house in San Francisco?

Jimmy said...

Let's see: built in 1898 and has survived some cat 5 hurricanes, check. Big verandas for shade (worth more than gold in Summer), check. Lots of A/C with outlet vents high up so the cold air will fall down, check. Very active gay community, check (I guess).

Anonymous said...

Oh yeah, now that I am done slamming his rumored gayness in comment #1, I would like to mention that I am jealous of the buyer of this house. I love it. Love it.

Anonymous said...

The pool area is divoon and will be the center piece of Miss Chesney's afternoon and early evening swim parties.

Anonymous said...

The ceiling fans are exactly what one would expect in the tropix. At least they don't have those hideous light kits.....

Anonymous said...

plenty of room for him and his gay buddies

Anonymous said...

Strangely enough, I don't fault Chesney for his cowboy hat wearing, and not being from the South or Southwest myself, I find those who sport them at any and all type of non-cowboy related functions annoying to say the least. At least Chesney has a good REASON to wear his besides standing out like a peacock.

Anonymous said...

I dunno about labeling Chesney gay unless one knows it to be a fact. Similiar rumours have swirled around other stars in the past, such as John Travolta and Tom Cruise, which don't appear to be true.

Anonymous said...

Nice house, great pool and a very happy place to be.

It's clear, to me at least, why Renee Zellweger ended her marriage to Mr Chesney. Travolta and Cruise...not gay but not straight either!

Anonymous said...

I agree the fans aren't bad. They probably aren't cheap Homo Depot either. You can spend a lot of money to find ceiling fans that AREN'T tacky as hell.

Anonymous said...

What about Kenny's house on St. John? And did anyone see the recent pics of him with his new girlfriend?

Royal said...

I like most of this house, save for the dining room. The fireplace is off-center because they chopped off part of it to create that ridiculously pretentious wine room. I'm all for wine storage rooms with hurricane proof temp control, but it's tacky to put them on display.

As for the fans, yea they're ugly but I think they're perfect. They're likely on 24/7 and they're the right color to blend in perfectly with the ceiling when they're running. You'd never notice them--unless you took a picture of the room which would freeze frame the blades...

Anonymous said...

avg joe here, I just came across this from the LA BLOG

18MM price reduction

lol :)

"This is the biggest price drop I’ve seen in the Malibu Real Estate market, ever. Starting out $39,500,000, this ocean front property has been chopped to $21,500,000 in 4 short months. That’s an $18,000,000 chop in 120 days! The home is located just south of the Paradise Cove pier and was recently remodeled.

Here’s the MLS description……
ONE OF MALIBU’S SPECIAL GATED BLUFF & BEACHFRONT COMPOUNDS OVERLOOKING DESIRABLE PARADISE COVE. NEWLY COMPLETED & OFFERING A SEAMLESS TRANSITION BETWEEN INDOOR & OUTDOOR LIVING & ENTERTAINING IN A CASUAL, YET DRAMATICALLY ELEGANT SETTING. PROPERTY FEATURES: A SPECTACULAR MAIN HOME W/ OCEANFRONT INFINITY POOL & SPA, GUEST HOUSES & BEACH PAVILION ON APPROX. 81′ OF SANDY BEACH FRONTAGE. APPROX. 2.4 LANDSCAPED ACRES IN TWO PARCELS, WITH LIMITLESS COASTLINE & OCEAN VISTAS. THERE IS NOTHING LIKE IT!!"

Anonymous said...

and still no takers

:)

Anonymous said...

a generator for the wine room? are you fucking kidding?

Anonymous said...

Mama...you are way off on this one. This home is stunning, inside and out. The architecture is amazing and serves the Key West community well...it wraps its arms around you and draws you in. I just returned from a trip to Key West a couple of weeks ago...had I known then, I would have camped out in front of that house in hopes Mr. Chesney would notice my firm ass and invite me in...lol.

Anonymous said...

It's possible Kenny's bi, but I know for sure he's not flat out gay. I work in a major hotel on the strip in Vegas and Kenny's stayed with us numerous times, and I can tell you he's enjoyed the company of women while he's been here. I don't know about guys, but I do know for a fact I've personally seen him with some nice looking gals.

He and his entourage do know how to have a good time. In my nine years of working at this hotel, some of it working directly with VIPs, we only had to hire extra security (above what we had already planned) once to keep crazed fans away from a celeb, and that was for Chesney. I will say he and his crew have always been polite and easy to get along with. Wish I could say that for all the celebs I've dealt with.

Anonymous said...

The stuffed parrot dangling by the kitchen window upsets me much more than the pot rack, I have to say.

Anonymous said...

The problem with Florida is the mosquitoes. Can someone get some bug killer out after the skeeter at 4:22/4:23?

Starck Mad said...

Despite the homogenized Bed & Breakfast look, I can see Kenny's cute tiny butt hopping into that pool!

Certainly not a place a Celeb would want to get away and get some privacy though?

Anonymous said...

I hate the living room curtains. I do believe that wall of fabric in the bedroom hides windows that would allow sunlight to burn you to ashes at dawn.

The potrack is safely situated over an island. Unless gravity works on the horizontal in Key West, I think we're all safe.

Hopefully, Kenny can use that outdoor gym to work on his fitness. There was that interview with Anderson Cooper in which the doughiness made him look like a very talented turtle - a turtle wearing a cowboy hat. It only brought out the turtleness in Anderson. It was sad.

Anonymous said...

Redeeming quality of the week: No plasma hanging from every damn wall.

Anonymous said...

Oh my freaking god, I'm swooning over this place!!!! I'd change a few things (the paint and some of the furniture) but it's absolutely to die for!

Anonymous said...

Hat or no hat.........straight or gay...........he still looks like Dobby in a cowboy suit to me. The arched upper level porch is spectacular and makes me remember Kathleen Turner in "Body Heat."

Anonymous said...

Kenny no longer lives in the Cap Cod style house in Franklin. He moved to River Road on the other side of town. He bought country music star Alan Jackson's house there.

Anonymous said...

This is a great house, so much better than the usual celeb crap. Just move the old stuff out, and...hopefully....he'll furnish and paint it so that everybody here will be happy.

Anonymous said...

7:18 - Thanks for sharing about your house, now can we go back to talking about Florida?

Anonymous said...

6:53 AM: Gay guys date hot girls all of the time. It's called "being in the closet." A very, very, very, very common thing. There are also things called "beards" for gay men.

Look at Ted Haggard as an example. He was just on Oprah.

Anonymous said...

Welcome to Key West, Kenny! My biggest hope is that locals and touristas alike will let you relax and enjoy your time here.

From one hetero to the rest of the bloggers....we enjoy a "one human family" credo in Key West. Why should anyone care which team Kenny's playing on? Chillax, folks!

Kim

Anonymous said...

10:51 AM: And there's the gay guys who indefatigably try to 'drag' any and every straight guy they please over to their side. It's called misery loves company for those sad cases who slander without a shred of real knowledge or proof.

Anonymous said...

5:43 - I doubt it's "misery loves company". More likely "gay men like (some) straight men". No different than "straight men like to see two women together".

The only ones who are miserable are the straight men who took their cousin to the prom and are currently "dating" a latex inflatable woman who came in a plain brown wrapper. Sorry if that hits too close to home for you.

Anonymous said...

I don't give a hoot if he's one of the gays or not. I would actually like to live in this house. If you look at the decorating style of all of his country crooners, this one is a REAL GEM!! Albeit, there is a wet bar in the bedroom, who doesn't like a cold drink after a meaningless snog?!? And the dining room? Aside from the sliding glass doors on the wine storage to showcase your KJ and Santa Margarita Pinot Grigio, I like it A LOT. Let's give this princess a little credit for taking GREAT strides for the country community. YOU GO!

Unknown said...

Sadly... a news update came out last night by the same POS paper that printed the first one about him... he's already put the house back on the market because of the invasion of privacy. Everyone in Key West has Sean Kinney at the Keynoter to thank for that one.

Pretty pathetic and sad if you ask me. Journalism isn't what it used to be... seems everyone's lost their respect for others and a sense of common decency.

Maybe next time Kenny! We would've loved having you as a resident!

music said...

"Kenny no longer lives in the Cap Cod style house in Franklin. He moved to River Road on the other side of town. He bought country music star Alan Jackson's house there."

I didn't know that Kenny bought Alan Jackson's place on the Cumberland River. It's probably a second home though as it's more like a cabin that Alan called the Fish Camp. Country Weekly had a spread on it a couple of years ago.

Love the Key West house. It's sad he's already re-selling.

Anonymous said...

Let's see, little, bald and gay...if his voice goes, he's SOL!

Anonymous said...

Well to all of you Kenny Chesney bashers.I do regret to inform you that WE together picked out that house. I love that house and he does to.And yes I am female, we were married last year in Las Vegas but didn't want to go public. We are very private people and perfer to stay that way as long as we can.But I am so sick of the gay Kenny bashing stuff and want it to stop that I may just go public with our story. But then again the media will not leave us alone.Can you imagine what it is like to live in a fish bowl? Really just stop to think what your life would be like if you were chased down with your every move like to the movies,grocery store,Walmart,or even to a Burger King.It is not fun at all,and when your on a boat you are even starred at also. So come on just stop the bashing let us live in peace. I am asking this from me.Thank-you Mrs C Chesney

Anonymous said...

Ok what you need to do is stop lieing about being married to him. I know him very well and you are not married and it is people like you who cause rumors to be started. You only wish you picked out a house with him and that he was your husband. Keep dreaming chic! Take a little of your own advice and leave him alone!