Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Stephen Dorff Unloading in Chelsea


SELLER: Stephen Dorff
LOCATION: West 19th Street, New York, NY
PRICE: $3,000,000 (maintenance and monthlies / $1,551)
SIZE: 1,200 square feet (approx.), 1 bedroom, 2 bathrooms
DESCRIPTION: ...Move right into this triple mint Chelsea duplex Penthouse with 800 square foot roof terrace. No detail was overlooked in this meticulous renovation...Upon entering the apartment, you are greeted with over sized windows, 14 foot ceilings, and abundant south light and city views...The master suite features abundant closets outfitted with systems, full bath with spa shower, and electronic shades. The pass thru kitchen features custom cabinetry with breakfast bar and stainless steel appliances including a Miele washer/dryer...

YOUR MAMAS NOTES: Late last night Your Mama was perusing all the candylicious listings in New York City and a sexxxy doo-plex penthouse in our old Manhattan 'hood caught our bleary and blood shot eyeballs. So, as we are often inclined to do, we peeped into the property records and discovered that the apartment is owned by one other than hard-bodied American ack-tor Stephen Dorff who recently listed his West 19th Street bachelor pad for $3,000,000.

We have to confess that we can't actually name a single movie in which thirty something year old Mister Dorff has strutted his stuff. However, we do recall three bits and pieces about him from our many years of pouring over all the gossip glossies. The first is that Mister Dorff once flashed the entire world his condom clad peen when he appeared totally and completely and stunningly nekkid in some movie we never saw. (There are pictures out there on the interweb if you can to locate them.) The second is that he's well known for working his way through a fair number of big name Hollywood hotties including but not limited to model Milla Jovovich, behemoth boobed Pammy Anderson, and that poor Jennifer Love Hewitt gurl. The third tidbit we can pull up from the dark recesses of our gin soaked mind is that back in the early 1990s Mister Dorff allegedly had some sort of romantic entanglement with REM front man Michael Stipe. Oh the scandal! But listen, it's just an unconfirmed rumor so none of you kids should go repeating it like it's gospel.

Anyhoo, property records (and a New York Times report from the time) reveal that Mister Dorff picked up his approximately 1,200 square foot Chelsea doo-plex in June of 2006 for $1,650,000. Listing information indicates the 1 bedroom and 2 bathroom apartment has had a "meticulous" renovation, which it clearly has. What we don't know is if Mister Dorff is responsible for the overhaul or if it was perhaps another Austin Powers wannabe.

Whatever the case, the day-core has a distinct and naughty voice that whispers, "Take your dress off and lay down on my fur covered couch." Right?

The open plan living space has ebonized wood floors and includes a living room with a double height ceiling , an entire wall of gorgeous shiny wood paneling and a few natural elements like a wood stump and driftwood-ish looking coffee table that keep it from looking too chilly. A dining area is adjacent to the decent sized (for a Manhattan apartment) kitchen and includes a pass through breakfast bar, dark wood cabinetry, and a suite of stainless steel appliances, natch. There appear to be a few appliances that we can't identify like that stainless panel to the left of the sink. Is that a trash compacter? Anyone? The expensive Miele brand washer and dryer are, unfortunately, located in the kitchen.

The bedroom has been carpeted, which we hate but can imagine the neighbors below appreciate when Mister Dorff is, uhm, entertaining. We can get behind the steel grey walls but we've got a serious issue with the all-wrong color of that doo-vay. The master bathroom certainly looks intriguing at first glance, but a closer look reveals a stainless steel terlit which is too prison like for our taste and we're positive the cleaning gurl curses Mister Dorff each time she has to remove all the water spots from that glistening black tile that covers the floor and walls.

Some of the high tech amenities include a Sony AV RMT surround sound system in the living room and bedroom and electronic solar shades for all those too lazy to pull their own curtains closed.

Up the spiral staircase (which scare the bejeezis out of our long bodied bitches Linda and Beverly) an 800 square foot terrace is what makes this penthouse better than the average over-sexified New York apartment. We might prefer a bit more shade where we could sip gin and tonics and flip through the tabs out of the scorch of the sunshine, but otherwise we are in l.o.v.e with this roof terrace. What's not to like about all that dee-voon decking, the wet bar with a fridge for keeping the cocktail ingredients cool, a storage closet for stashing the chaise lounges in the winter time and we're just mad for the outdoor shower. How many people get to shower under the night sky in New York? Not many.

Iffin any interested parties are not ready to commit the finances for a three million dollar one bedroom apartment, we understand that Mister Dorff would also be willing to lease the place for $15,000 a month.

Mister Dorff may be the most famous resident of this West 19th Street building, but he's not the only well known resident. Property records show that in April of 2008 prolific and egotastic designer Karim Rashid plunked down $2,475,000 to purchase a 1,771 square foot unit a few floors down from Mister Dorff's doo-plex.

On the west coast, property records show that Mister Dorff owns a 2,298 square foot ocean front house in Malee-boo that he scooped up for $2,546,000 back in December of 2001 and it would appear that he also owns a 4,894 square foot house in a horsey north western suburb of Los Angles called Bell Canyon.

26 comments:

Anonymous said...

Good luck with the Bell Canyon property, considering the fires!

Hippie Canyon said...

I have to assume his spread in Bell Canyon is to satisfy his Broke Back Mt tendencies, otherwise it doesn't make sense that he would have something up there. The demographics of Bell Canyon vs Malibu & Manhattan couldn't be more different. Anyways, this Apt is so... me, actually. But, for $3M - I want two bedrms.

suzy zabiche said...

This apartment is soooo uber-sexy with all that delicious black cabinetry in the kitchen coupled with the stainless steel, and those gloss black tiles in the bathroom. I too had never heard of this chap, but a quick google and hey, what a hottie piece of tottie he is! It is a shame that the grotesque duvet in the bedroom lets down the whole shebang, but hey it's easily changed. Loverly!

Anonymous said...

Nice...but I wouldn't pay that much for it even if I did have a few million to throw at it. I'd pay low 2s.

Celebrity Pasta said...

A little over-priced, by about a million! Do like the shower though! Great blog by the way, will be back.

ms_wonderland said...

Jee-zus that bathroom is monsterously ugly. Must like looking at his soapy bod reflected in the mornings.

Stephen Dorff recently finished filming 'Public Enemies' with Johnny Depp and Christian Bale, so a few more folks will have heard of him by next summer. Yes, he's a slut, demanding to be supplied with a new female every night of the shoot. That's all the goss I have.

Anonymous said...

Stephen Dorff was on Roseanne today, as a teenaged boyfriend of one of the Conner girls. I was curious who the young actor was, so I looked it up. Then I click on the Real Estalker, and there's Stephen Dorff selling an apartment. Spooky. And I didn't know who he was either.

Anonymous said...

Nice apartment, nice looking man. Googled to see what Mama was talking about and yes children, it is up to Ms. Anderson's standards.

What I'm wondering is how long before "outsmoker" has to appear with his only contribution to Mama's blog.

Rich said...

Mama, I got bad news for ya. The Stephen Dorff whose selling the 19th Street property is not the actor Stephen Dorff, but rather his father, Stephen Dorff, Sr., who is a musician.

The actor has a place in Malibu, which is not for sale.

Sorry to burst a bubble....but this unit is definitely the father's.

Rich Kappler
R C A L

Rich said...

Mama, I got bad news for ya. The Stephen Dorff whose selling the 19th Street property is not the actor Stephen Dorff, but rather his father, Stephen Dorff, Sr., who is a musician.

The actor has a place in Malibu, which is not for sale.

Sorry to burst a bubble....but this unit is definitely the father's.

Rich Kappler
R C A L

outsmoker said...

Just when I was going to comment on the fantastic smoker-friendly veranda.....................the real stephen Dorff is a hot smoker!

Anonymous said...

All due respect Rich Kappler, but this is the pied a terre of a sixty something year old married man? I have a had time believing that.

sandpiper said...

Livingroom reminds me of the basement hangout on That '70s Show. The floors and paneled wall rock, otherwise, trying to visualize this one with white painted walls -- and empty.

Great deck. Serious potential. Wow.

Anonymous said...

The movie where he bared his plentiful penis is ShadowBoxer.

http://rds.yahoo.com/_ylt=A0geu9.kifZIhYoA6cVXNyoA;_ylu=X3oDMTEzODZiZ2swBHNlYwNzcgRwb3MDNQRjb2xvA2FjMgR2dGlkA1lTMjQ4Xzkx/SIG=12gtif05m/EXP=1224203044/**http%3a//www.queerty.com/morning-goods-stephen-dorff-20070129/

so_chic_darling said...

Ooooooooooooooooh I love this apartment and I'm sorry Ms Wonderland but although you may want to brush your teeth at a whitewashed louis meets shabby chic vanity I think this is one sexy cool bathroom and Mama I love the stainless toilet. Yes about one million overpriced at least but so great!

so_chic_darling said...

Oh I forgot to ask if "Stephen Dorff unloading in Chelsea" is the title of a porn film he's in?

so_chic_darling said...

.......and there's a one bedroom for sale in the same building, also fully renovated and on two levels, for 1.3 million OK!

average joe :[) said...

Do you think that when the dow goes to zero these morons will learn to finally give into the real world ?

That same place was selling for 200k in 1999

and now it is worth 1500% more ?

pch said...

I don't usually get all that stoked about bathrooms, but I'm with So Chic on this one -- it's completely cool.

average joe :[) said...

Do you think that a moron like me will learn to finally find a blog where someone is interested in my diarrhea ?

This same diarrhea has been coming out of my brain since 1999

and now I don't know reality from my diarrhea brain

lil' gay boy said...

ms_wonderland, I too am enamored of the bathing facilities; it's very difficult to find just the right towel ring that one can handcuff a date to that matches the black subway tile so well……

So_Chic, "Stephen Dorff unloading in Chelsea"; great minds think alike!

Anonymous said...

I like the bathroom and the terrace, but this place is so small. Also, I would not be able to shower without some shading on those windows. This place is an exhibitionists dream.

Flora said...

What the hell are "abundant closets outfitted with systems" ??? Can a transpondian explain to this dumb Brit?

Closet Systems aside, this is one cool, sleek and sexy pied a terre, but it won't do as a full time residence, despite the lovely outdoor spaces, which must help justify the premium asking price.

Anonymous said...

flora:
My best guess is that the closets have some sort of fancy organizational built-in shelving, drawers, pants hangers, etc. I noticed that from the one bedroom photo, there seems to be little furniture, so perhaps the closet is really tricked out for maximizing the storage space.

Cool crash pad, but super expensive for its size.

jack said...

G Lounge is two doors away from this building it is the A list gay bar in Chelsea.

Anonymous said...

very sexy ...the appliamnce to the left of the sink is the washer...the item to the left of that is the dryer..
alot of buildings wern't designed to have in suite laundry so owners adapt them and use the plumbing in the kitchen