Monday, April 9, 2007

Denise Richards Is On the Move...Again

SELLER: Denise Richards
LOCATION: Long Valley Road, Hidden Hills, CA
PRICE: $4,495,000
SIZE: 5,188 square feet, 5 bedrooms, 5 bathrooms
DESCRIPTION: Hidden Hills one story hourse property on more than one acre of landscaped gounds. Fully remodeled. More than 5 bedroosm, 4.5 baths, office and gym. Beautiful grounds with rolling lawns, barbecue area, outdoor fireplace, swimming pol, spa, and barn.

YOUR MAMAS UPDATE: For photos and additional information on this property click here.

YOUR MAMAS NOTES: Poor Denise Richards. The former Bond gurl and nekkid Playboy model is packing her bags once again. Her very busy PR machine claims Miz Richards is selling this house because she wants to buy a nicer and larger house that will allow her ill mother to move in with her.

Well, that certainly sounds noble, but the tabs have been reporting something very different and far less admirable. Seems Miz Richards recently invited a couple of photographers from US Magazine behind the gates of her exclusive Hidden Hills neighborhood, which is also home to privacy seeking celebrities such as Matt LeBlanc, Lisa Marie Presley, and Melissa Etheridge and her baby making wife. The neighbors, who live in gated communities in horsey Hidden Hills to get away from paparazzi, are up-set. Very, very angry. The tabs are reporting that the neighbors have so shamed Miz Richards, both publicly and privately, that Richards is pulling up stakes and calling the movers.

This is not the first time Miz Richards has bought and sold a house in less time than most people can get the lawn mowed. In May of 2005, Richards fled the Encino house she shared with Sheen and paid $3,995,000 for a large house at 4671 Middle Fork Road in Westlake Village. This would be right around the corner from Heather Locklear, the queen of Westlake Village and Miz Richards' (former) best pal.

Locklear was also going through a public dee-vorce from Bon Jovi guitarist Richie Sambora and the two were good support for each other. Your Mama imagines these two sitting by the pool at sunset sharing a BIG bottle of white wine and giggling about the shortcomings and shenanigans of their soon to be ex-huzbands. All was good between these two until Miz Richards foolishly started having sex with Sambora. Gurl, what were you thinking? Honestly. That is just so stoopid.

So you know Miz Richards couldn't stay in Westlake Village with the fierce, scorned, and justifiably furious Heather Locklear breathing down her neck. So she she sold that house in July, 2006 for $4,100,000, which surely amounted to a small net loss once the real estate fees were paid.

Miz Richards, who is widely rumored to call the photogs every time she pees or leaves the house, high-tailed it out of Westlake Village and over to Hidden Hills where she purchased this property in May of 2006 for an even $4,000,000. Now on the market of $4,495,000, Miz Richards stands to make just a wee bit of money once she sells the house and pays the real estate fees.

On a side note, Your Mama received a tip from the Easter Bunny this weekend about Richards' real estate dealings, and the kind rabbit gave us a little history lesson about the Encino home Miz Richards shared with Charlie Sheen. Both the Easter Bunny and Your Mama are quite sure the couple lived at 4875 Louise Avenue in Encino, a house that was once owned by fat actress Kirstie Alley and later the amazing Katy Sagal.

Another interesting tidbit that the Easter Bunny tipped us off about is that Miz Richards purchases her properties through trusts named after one of her five dogs.

Your Mama is worn out from recounting the trials and travails of Miz Richards, so we're going to let the children dicuss the details of this property. But before we sign out, we would like to address the all that shabby chic interior decor. Your Mama does not have any issues with shabby chic in and of itself. In fact Your Mama and the Dr. Cooter actually have a white slip-covered sofa in one of our houses. But we are concerned that Miz Richards' has filled this place up with too much of a good thing, you know?

We are digging that leopard patterned carpeting in the master bedroom. But again we see too much of a good thing as Miz Richards has unfortunately had the same carpeting installed in the family room.

It has been widely reported that Miz Richards is out and about looking for a new house on the Westside of Los Angeles in the $7,000,000 range. Your Mama would like the children to note that all the paparazzi seem to know exactly where she's going to be looking at properties and are present to snap pictures of here coming and going. Who's tipping them off? Is it possible she employs a photographer to document her every move?

And, if we may be so bold, one word of advice to Miz Richards and her handlers: Stop calling the photographers. It's unseemly. Really. We feel your career would best be served by lying low for a short bit and letting everyone forget about the high drama that has been your life the last couple of years.

Sources: The Easter Bunny, Perez Hilton, Celebrity Dog Watcher

7 comments:

Steven said...

Oh Mama you stay up soo late to write these articles! You are truly appreciated!

Anonymous said...

That carpet definetly doesn't go with the shabby chic furnishings or dreaded faux finish. The property looks beautiful, but the house needs a decorator.

Your Mama said...

Steven hunny, we are so glad you appreciate our late nights and early mornings. Your Mama has a lot of children to keep happy and informed and it pleases us to no end to know that some of them appreciate our efforts enough to let us know.

Anonymous said...

Mama, you seem to have scooped both The LA Times and US Weekly about Avril Lavigne's purchase. They are both just reporting on it today. Congrats! Although I believe they should have credited you with the story, shame on them.

1974

Anonymous said...

Looks like Denise is a serious whackjob. Calling the paps herself, over her every move?? How desperate can you get?

The mention of shabby chic brings to mind the pix I saw of Pam Anderson's house. It's so full of distressed white furniture and halfway-to-antique-accessorized, it makes you wonder just what's going on in her silicone fueled body.

The Gilded Moose said...

Westlake Village???? Why?

dawngullage@hotmail.com said...

Mama, I know this is an old article b ut I liked that New England Style house where she filmed at 23726 Long Valley Road in Hidden Hills. I am wondering why YOU of all people never caught on to or as why at the end of Season 1 of her show, she was suddenly moved into a hotel and out of that shabby too much chic house. MLS listing says as of 6/7/10 she still owns it. Ms. Richard love to twitter and puts pics up about her remodeling a pool/landscaping but is it the same house as she filmed or did she buy again (ripped off again)?
Please give us a reason why E tv shoved her into a hotel with pigs, dogs, kids, cats and whatever else was crawling around. Love you Mama your a hoot and a good journalist. dawngullage@hotmail.com