Monday, July 2, 2012

UPDATE: Sheikh Hamad bin Jassim bin Jaber Al Thani

The last real estate news Your Mama and the children heard about Sheikh Hamad bin Jassim bin Jaber Al Thani—otherwise known as the Prime Minister of Qatar—his $31,500,000 overbid to purchase two of deceased copper heiress Hugette Clark's time capsule-like co-operative apartments at 907 Fifth Avenue was resoundingly rejected.

The board at 907, so the story went, was concerned the mustachioed sheik's diplomatic immunity could make it impossible to seek legal recourse in the unlikely event the astronomically rich statesman ever failed to pay his monthly common charges. They were additional rumbles and reports about the board's—probably legitimate—concerns over the number of people who might occupy the premises at any given time; The sheikh has 2 wives, 15 children and an extensive, ever-present entourage that includes an armed security detail.

Anyhoo, now word comes down the gossip grapevine (via the New York Post) that the lavish-livin' sheikh is the spendy mystery buyer who—as previously reported here, there and everywhere in mid-May (2012)—agreed to cough up more than $90,000,000 for a duplex penthouse atop the not-yet-completed, Christian de Portzamparc-designed One57 tower in Midtown Manhattan.

Not too many details have been made public about the two-floor penthouse that has sky-high, 360-degree Central Park and city views. The penthouse is reported to occupy the entire 89th and 90th floors of the 1,000 foot tall tower, measure 10,923 square feet and feature, according to the Post's report, "a 'grand salon,' a large mezzanine, four fireplaces, floor-to-ceiling windows, at least five bedrooms, and motorized window shades." We like—nay,, we l.o.v.e. the motorized window shades but ninety-some million damn clams and not a single square foot of private outdoor space from which to smoke an apés dinner doobie or take in the head-swimming view al fresco? Uh, no thanks.

An unidentified source told the peeps at the Post that not only has the sheikh agreed to pay close to $100,000,000 for the duplex penthouse, he's also ready, willing and able to shell out another $150,000,000 for four more full-floor residences where, Your Mama imagines, he plans to put up his posse of body guards, butlers, valets, terlit gurls, whisker washers and ass kissers. If the scuttlebutt is true, according to our bejeweled abacus, the sheikh will spend a quarter billion dollars on his Manhattan pied-a-terre, not counting customization costs and furnishings that could quite easily run into the tens of millions.

Naturally, the 50-something year old sheikh owns several other pricey properties around the world including, no doubt, a college campus-sized compound in his home country of Qatar. Like many Middle Eastern sheikhs and potentates, Mister al-Thani maintains a base in London where he owns a sprawling penthouse pad at the stupefyingly expensive One Hyde Park complex in London's natty and nabob-y Knightsbridge nabe.

More than one of Your Mama's better connected informants have told us the sheikh owns an estate in the same gated Los Angeles enclave where action star turned governator Arnold Schwarzenegger, German supermodel turned reality tee-vee mogul Heidi Klum, and professional pig skin tosser Tom Brady and his (possibly) preggers again Brazilian supermodel wife Giselle Bundchen all maintain baronial mansions.

In late 2010 the sheikh paid L.A.-based billionaire Tom Gores $34,500,000 for 8-plus prime (and vacant) acres on a very prominent promontory above the Bel-Air Country Club where—Your Mama imagines—he plans to erect a massive, opulent and high-maintenance residential monument to his wealth that he'll probably only use a few weeks a year. Such are the real estate ways of the world's super rich.

In addition to his myriad of stationary residences around the world, the globe-trotting sheikh also keeps a 437 foot long, navy blue-hulled boat called Al Mirqab said to have a soaring, four-story main staircase with hand-cut crystal panels and a glass sculpture by American artist Dale Chihuly.

Your Mama needs a nerve pill chased with a gin & tonic to contemplate the cost to fill the gas tanks of a ship-sized pleasure boat nearly as long as 1.5 football fields. We'd bet both our still-kicking long-bodied bitches Linda and Beverly that it's way more than Your Mama and The Dr. Cooter combined have ever earned in an entire year.

artist renderings of One57: Extell Development Company (via One57.com)

17 comments:

Avi said...

Lawd have mercy!
New York just keeps on churning out the real estate sales records!
I'm gonna need Mr. Ryboblev,his daughter Ekatarina and their $88 million dollar 15 Central Park West apartment to take several seats to the left, cause they just got served! Big time!

Mama, we gonna need interior pics when the tower is finished one day. Only you are capable of that feat Mama!

Anonymous said...

Mister Al Thani's Brentwood estate is currently for sale.

Anonymous said...

I thought I heard something from the direction of New York. It was the sigh of relief from the developer when he unloaded that penthouse. And no discount?

Anonymous said...

God, I would kill myself if I had to live around these people and all the BS that they bring with them.

Must be nice to plunder then bank account of an entire country to do whatever you want with the money.

candi speling said...

Damn that's a mouthful. Mama hoping you and the Dr. Cooter have a lovely July 4th. I'll be raising my glass to you here in HOTlanta. And gurl, when I say hot, I do mean HOT. Candi

Anonymous said...

Ermmm, no. He is not plundering any bank account of his country. The only bank account that is getting plundered is his own.

Let's not hate on the rich because they got money. That gentleman is one of the biggest philantropists in the world.

Anonymous said...

"Mister al-Thani maintains a base in London where he owns a sprawling penthouse pad at the stupefyingly expensive One Hyde Park complex"

He's looking for a new London home as his cousin/brother [?] owns a property on Park Lane called 'Dudley House' that's 44,000 Sqft & has been appraised at £250M [$392M] ... which is far more luxurious than any apartment at One Hyde Park. The only property said to be worth more in London [ignoring Royal Palaces] is the Latsis shipping family's London home.

Anonymous said...

This is such an Arab/Middle Eastern thing to do. Hope I don't offend anyone, but they all love to flash the cash and flaunt as much as possible. Spend till there's nothing left to spend (In his case, that will probably be never). If anyone here has Arab friends or neighbors you know what I'm talking about. Not hating, just saying.

Anonymous said...

"This is such an Arab/Middle Eastern thing to do"

Many Arabs would agree! Though I know wealthy Arabs in London [mainly Lebanese & Egyptians] who do a lot of eye rolling when it comes to the flashy, ostentatious Arabs.

Anonymous said...

2:11 Care to specify some of his charities. I find it quite interesting how well the Arab tyrants of the Middle East get along with the Israelis. One might think the tyrants would use some of their vast wealth to help the Palestinian victims of Israel oppression (yes it is, don't deny it) instead of squandering their riches on themselves and their families and friends. Obscene and selfish spending in the midst of misery is beyond disgusting.

Princess Maha al Sudairi said...

He has spent billions on his homes and yachts for his family and chilluns, why can't he send me just $8 mill like I axed him to?!?!?!?! This hotel bills ain't gonna pay itself, i spent ol' Nayef's last child support check before he kicked the bucket on three lifesize Swarovski crystal elephants!!!! With custom Loubs on dem bitches' foots too, dammm that was cute!!! Seriously, what's a gal to do???? Broke as hell, can't find no prince who wants to hit this old sack o' bones no more! Come on Hamad, help a sista out!!!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

OMG, beautiful!! Rich, fabulous! Long live rich Arabs!!! Long live Oil! YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

Bitter queen alert @ 1:00 and 4:12.

Rugby E. Root said...

So does this mean that One57 is set to become the Olympic Tower for the '10s and '20s?

And I wanted to address this:

"The board at 907, so the story went, was concerned the mustachioed sheik's diplomatic immunity could make it impossible to seek legal recourse in the unlikely event the astronomically rich statesman ever failed to pay his monthly common charges."

I don't know about the Qatari, but the Saudi royal family is (in)famous for entering into purchase agreements and then not paying for very expensive things, even though they have the money. The laundry list of lawsuits against them stretch across at least two continents.

Latoyapgpb said...
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workboy53 said...
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