Thursday, December 9, 2010

Look Who's Gettin' Hitched

Looks like former reality show star and once upon a time it-gurl about Tinseltown Nicole Richie and her Good Charlotte musician baby-daddy Joel Madden are finally getting married. Most reports indicate the upcoming winter-themed nuptials are to take place in the backyard of Miss Richie's daddy's massive mansion that overlooks the Los Angeles Country Club in Beverly Hills, CA.

From the looks of things Miss Richie and her army of nice, gay wedding planners* have covered and tented Papa Richie's swimming pool as well as erected several other tents and such around the terraced back yard. The white tents will not only keep any possible rain at bay but also keep the flying paparazzi from popping off any pictures of them as they officially, in the eyes of the gubbamint, hitch their wagons.
Miss Richie's famous father Lionel–a man who has sold more than 100,000,000 albums–bought the scene of his daughter's wedding in August of 1999, according to property records, for six million smackers. According to the Los Angeles County Tax Man, the Italian Renaissance Revival residence was built in 1929, measures 12,787 square feet and includes 6 bedrooms and a baker's dozen of bathrooms. 13 poopers, puppies. Mister Richie had his palatial 28-room home photographed by the folks at Architectural Digest (above) for their May 2007 issue, which says the house is 17,000 square feet. The online article and photos seems to be blocked–or at least blocked from Your Mama's eyeballs–but thanks to Andre the Giant (and the fine folks over at Curbed) we managed to get our grubby hands on a few for the hungry children to salivate over.

The palatial residence includes a ballroom sized formal living room with a highly decorative molded plaster and painted plaster ceiling, some 17th century these and 18th century thats, built-in shelves full of objet d'art, custom designed pelmets and at least one onyx topped table. The decadence continues into the dining room furnished with 18th century mahogany chairs and a walnut refectory table topped with a silver and black lacquer plateau once owned by actor Danny Thomas.

The oak paneled library is where Mister Richie displays his many professional accolades in shelves directly behind a sofa upholstered with lush cut velvet. A bronze bust of Malcolm X sits in front of a painting by Miles Davies in the sunroom and atop a piano where Mister Richie composed some of his hit songs. In the master bedroom, which overlooks a rose garden, a brocade baldechin wraps around the painted and gilded bed and the living room sized master pooper has oak flooring, a fireplace and a freestanding soaking tub set into a marble slab set on a wood base.

Pergola shaded and limestone terraces tumble down the hillside of the back yard that includes a swimming pool with pool house, elegant (and phallic) cypress trees, lots of roses and a palm tree or two.

Young Miss Richie and Mister Madden put the family cart before the proverbial horse and already have a couple of toddlers and, as far as we know, the Richie-Madden family still live up in the Laurel Canyon crib that's far less extravagant than her father's house and that they bought from some former professional athlete in June of 2009 for $1,912,000.

*Have some sense, children, Your Mama does not have a clue if little Miss Richie's wedding planners are gay or nice or if she's even employed one of those wedding day drillmasters, okay?

photo (top): Pacific Coast News
photos (bottom): Mary E. Nichols for Architectural Digest

3 comments:

Rosco Mare said...

The very polite Lionel Richie bought the Guggenheim House from men's fashion retailer Bijan. Bijan tore the house apart, then moved a few doors down the street to an expensive spec house that was once occupied by singer Luis Miguel, leaving the Guggenheim house a shambles.

Other talented people have lived on the cul-de-sac: Randolph Scott (house demolished next door), Julie Andrews and Blake Edwards, Dorothy McGuire (house demolished), and David Geffen.

Anonymous said...

Its been reported that Mindy Weiss was involved as a wedding planner.

claudia said...

I absolutely love your column. I'm a realtor and wish I could write as 'colorful' as you. You make me laugh every day. Thanks :)