Tuesday, August 16, 2011

Kim Kardashian to Wed At Ellen Degeneres' Former Estate

UPDATE (Next day): Turns out Extra–and, by extension, Your Mama–got it wrong. The correct and updated information on the Kim Kardashian wedding is located here.

While Your Mama and the Dr. Cooter couldn't care less there are oodles of children and other folks in a high state of anxiety and anticipation over the upcoming nuptials of behemoth booty-ed reality tee-vee superstar Kim Kardashian and professional ball dribbler Kris Humphries.

There are two just things we know about this impending matrimonial ceremony/Kardashian family public relation über-event, both of which we gleaned by unwanted osmosis via all the gossip glossies, celebrity blogs and boob-toob entertainment "news" programs. The first is that Kimmy K. and her entourage of sisters and bridesmaids will be expensively clad in custom made gowns by wedding dress designer extraordinaire Vera Wang who, in what may or may not be a coinky-dink, just dropped $9,200,000 for a glassy house in Beverly Hills.

The second bit of intel we've passively soaked up comes courtesy of the celebrity scuttlebutt slingers at Extra who reported on the telly tonight that the wagon hitching ceremony cum tabloid spectacle will take place this coming Saturday at an historic and well-known estate with celebrity connections nestled into the ocean view hills of the uppity seaside enclave of Montecito, CA,

The lavish but low-key estate belongs to high profile Silicon Valley royal Eric Schmidt, otherwise known as the former CEO of Google. When the multi-billionaire stepped down from his post atop the corporate pyramid at Google in early 2011 he received a $100,000,000 parting gift. Before his exit from Google was announced he and they engineered a plan to sell a fractional block of his overall stock that at current rates would put more than three hundred million clammers in his already over-stuffed wallet.

Mister Schmidt acquired the property in November 2007 when he paid comedienne/chat show host Ellen Degeneres and her Sapphic wife Portia de Rossi $20,000,000 for the four-ish acre estate. Celebrity real estate watchers will recall that notoriously fickle property maven Ellen Degeneres picked up the impressive spread in October 2006 for around $15,750,000 and by March of the following year had flipped her picture-perfect compound back on the market with a hugely increased asking price of $24,000,000.

The privately situated and heavily secured luxury compound's architectural heart and soul is a 5,000-plus square foot main house with 4 bedrooms and 4 full and 2 half bathrooms designed by beloved Santa Barbara architect George Washington Smith. Staff and/or guests can be comfortably accommodated in a detached 1-bedroom guest house with kitchen and an additional studio space tucked into a quiet corner provides private respite from family members and all the full-time staff people required to maintain an estate of this magnitude.

At the time Mister Schmidt snatched up the property, the extensively and meticulously landscaped grounds included a long winding drive, massive motor court, championship grade tennis court, extra-long swimming pool with raised spa area, wide terraces, broad lawns, and a stunning allée with colorful tiled fountain that screams out for a highly stylized celebrity wedding designed–we presume–by an efficient, innovative and extremely well-paid event planner.

The children should note the photos here reflect the house as it appeared when Miz and Missus Degeneres acquired the property in 2006.

listing photos: Sotheby's International Realty


Anonymous said...

The Daily Mail brings us the article too! Has a nice aerial photo.

Anonymous said...

Sorry dipshits, but Sotto Il Monte is the estate they will be getting married at.

Anonymous said...

Close but no cigar.

Anonymous said...

Fake wedding no matter where it's held.