Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Bill and Giuliana Rancic Buy Big House in Hinsdale, and etc.

MonetizeBUYERS: Bill Rancic and Giuliana (DePandi) Rancic
LOCATION: Hinsdale, IL
PRICE: $1,560,000
SIZE: 12,000 (ish) square feet, 7 bedrooms, 9.5 bathrooms

YOUR MAMAS NOTES: The past few years have been a bit of a real estate whirlwind for celebrity news gossip Giuliana (Depandi) Rancic and her entrepreneurial man-mate Bill Rancic. Since getting married in 2007 the budding young couple have bought and sold a number of properties in both Los Angeles, CA and Chicago, IL including a recently acquired a mansion in a the upscale Chicago suburb of Hinsdale.

Mister Rancic, who once auditioned for that sicko show The Bachelor on which a dozen or so tarted up woman grovel embarrassingly for the affections of a single man, rocketed to fame in 2004 as the winner of the first season of Donald Trump's The Apprentice program. Prior to becoming one of Mister Trump's minions he made boo-coo bucks with an online endeavor called Cigars Around the World. Nowadays Mister Rancic earns an impressive living as a motivational speaker, reality television denizen, real estate developer and the host of a program we've never heard of on the A&E channel called We Mean Business.

Like her huzband, Missus Rancic also takes a multi-pronged approach to her career. Not only does she work her skinny stuff as the hostess with the mostess on E! News with Mister Vanilla Bean himself, Ryan Seacrest, she regularly fawns over the sartorial and tonsorial choices of famous folks at various red carpet events, sometimes co-hosting with that deeply troubling lavender haired Jay Manuel character from America's Next Top Model who regrettably wears more damn make-up than the late, great Tammy Faye Baker. Missus Rancic also appears on a program called the Fashion Police, an after the red carpet show show on which fashion, ahem, icons like Joan Rivers and Khloe Kardashian critique red carpet walkers. Thankfully, the people at Fashion Police have finally and recently installed some actual fashionistas like Kelly Osbourne and kinky haired celebrity stylist George Kotsiopoulos on the panel because, come on, Khloe Kardashian? Pleeze. Hasn't the world had enough of these Kardashians yet? Lord knows Your Mama has.

Anyhoo, in the mid 2000s he wrote–with the help of actual writers–a number of self-help style books about how to succeed in bizness and life and in 2007 she wrote a dating advice book for lonely women called Think Like a Guy: How to Get a Guy by Thinking Like One. Together, after they got hitched, they penned I Do, Now What?, a relationship advice book.

The apparently quite happy couple, who never, ever, EVER seem turn down an opportunity to have a tee-vee camera pointed at them, were married in 2007 in a fairy tale type ceremony in Italy that was watched on The Style Network by upwards of five million people. She settled in Los Angeles where she works most of the time and he in Chicago where his budding bizness empire is based.

In 2009 the couple swung open the doors of their private life for the world to watch on the reality program Giuliana & Bill. Since Your Mama and the Dr. Cooter prefer our reality television programs be of the tawdry and trashy variety, we've never actually laid eyes or ears on the couple's eponymous reality show. From our brief bit of research on the interweb we understand that much of the program revolves around the bumps and bounces of the very busy newlyweds who maintain an inter-state marriage.

The paper thin Missus Rancic has been wanting to get a baby up in her the last few years, a sad saga that has, we understand, played itself out on the couple's reality program. Her doctors suggested she try to put some meat on her bones in order to increase her chances of getting preggers. She gained a few pounds that no one but her could see and went through the expensive in vitro fertilization process since the normal way, while fun, just didn't produce the desired result. She did get to be with child, but in September of 2010 Missus Rancic had a miscarriage, an horrific and intensely personal event filmed for their reality program.

A few weeks ago on an episode of their reality program, the couple was seen hunting for a house in upscale Hinsdale, IL, due west of downtown Chicago. Ever since then Your Mama has received an unusual number of queries from the children who want to know which house shown on the show Mister and Missus Rancic purchased. A few minutes digging around the interweb one day didn't produce any real estate gold so we set the matter aside and promptly forgot about it until we until we received a covert communique last week from Suhneeta Snitcharoo who relayed all the 411 about Mister and Missus Rancic's new nest, which property records reveal they actually purchased in May of 2010.

Property records and listing information show that Mister and Missus Rancic paid $1,560,000 for a not yet completed mansion that's a short hop from downtown Hinsdale, measures a monstrous 12,000(ish) square feet and includes a total of 7 bedrooms and 9.5 poopers. That's a lot of house and too many damn terlits for a child-free couple but iffin Your Mama had to guess we'd guess they'll soon jump back on the in vitro horse and ride again. Or maybe they'll adopt, who knows? By whatever method, the Rancics clearly plan to make or acquire babies. Now they have plenty of room to raise all the babies they've not yet had.

Listing information for the property that Your Mama teased out of the internets shows that all the cabinets, floors, plumbing, heating, windows, and doors–much of which had yet to be installed at the time of the purchase–were included in the purchase price of the hulking house that stands three stories tall. Listing information indicates the house has scads of stone and brick detailing, numerous stone columns, a double staircase to the upper level (plus an elevator for when they feel lazy), a wine cellar and media room. Your Mama presumes the completion and customization of Mister and Missus Rancic's somewhat recently purchased residence will feature prominently on future episodes of the couple's reality tee-vee program.

Now then, let's move on to the peripatetic pair's other recent real estate doings, shall we?

In July of 2007 Mister Rancic shelled out $1,500,000 for a single family townhouse on Chicago's Gold Coast. The 1908 residence was given a Rancic Re-do and flipped back on the market and sold in March of 2009 for $3,595,000. Listing information shows the 5,460 square foot townhouse has 3 bedrooms 3.5 poopers, a complete movie theater, exterior security cameras, radiant heated floors, a heated 1.5 car garage, and 10 flat screen televisions. Ten! We think 10 tee-vees is probably to be expected from a tee-vee couple but Your Mama would go out of our damn mind knowing there were 10 tee-vees in the house. We love the damn squawk box as much as the next person but we just can't understand the need of some people to have at least one in every room. It's unclear–or, rather, Your Mama has no idea–if Mister and Missus Rancic ever actually occupied the townhouse property.

In May of 2009, Missus Rancic took in $725,000 when she sold her Thom Filicia decorated bachelorette pad on the 20th floor of a Wilshire Boulevard high-rise in Los Angeles. Property records show Missus Rancic picked the place up in January of 2003–when she was still Miss DePandi–for $465,000. Missus Rancic first listed the 1 bedroom and 2 pooper pad in March of 2008 for $899,000 but by March of 2009 when Your Mama diss and discussed the condo it was listed at $749,000. Since Missus Rancic slings gossip and critiques clothes primarily in Tinseltown, we assume that she and the mister have purchased another Lala Land pied a terre but, honestly bunnies, Your Mama don't know nuthin' about that.

In June of 2009, Mister and Missus Rancic parted with $1,185,000 when they bought a foreclosed condo on high floor of a high-rise on Michigan Avenue's Miracle Mile. The 2 bedroom and 2.5 pooper aerie was given the Rancic Re-do and has been on the market since April of 2010 when it first appeared with an asking price of $1,650,000. The price has since dipped and dropped to it's current price tag of $1,499,000.
The 50th floor spread, seen frequently on the couple's reality program, has lovely matte finish ebony hardwood floors, acres of gleaming white walls, phenomenal views, an open plan main living area, and a sleek kitchen with dark flat fronted cabinets, marble counter tops and, strangely, a bright school bus yellow stove that glares out at you, smiles and hisses "What are you looking at, asshole?"

The poopers, wrapped in travertine and frosted glass, were all worked over in the renovation and the walk in closet in the master bedroom is a custom crafted corridor lined with cabinets and drawers that hide every belt, slipper and slip dress. Iffin Your Mama were the betting type we'd ante up our britches that the outside wings of the tri-panel mirror at the end of the closet corridor fold in like in a fain-cee department store dressing room and enable Missus Rancic to see all sides of herself when she's trying to decide what to wear. That's not an easy thing to do for Missus Rancic, choosing and outfit, because let's be honest, celery sticks, if beehawtcha's gonna be on the boob-toob smartin' off about the unfortunate fashion choices of other people in the public eye then she better be turning in out every damn time. There's no such thing as going to the 7-11 in a ratty-tatty pair of sweatpants and a tube top for Missus Rancic, you know?

As for the day-core? Meh. There's nothing really wrong with it; It's all very non-threatening, contemporary and camera friendly. There's little Your Mama sees besides the cockamamie and ill-chosen artworks that will challenge or should offend any delicate decorative palettes. It looks to Your Mama like every stick of furniture here came from the same showroom or shop. That's a convenient way to go if your bizzy–and these two are bizzy little beavers–but it also leaves the place with precious little real personality, like a tee-vee set or an expensive but generic suite in a huge chain hotel that's trying to masquerade as a chic boo-teek hotel. You know what we're saying?

Your Mama imagines that if Mister and Missus Rancic have not yet completed their Rancic Re-do and moved into their new mansion in Hinsdale, they'll soon be doing so, setting out pumpkins, hanging a sheet ghost in the tree, laying some dried wheat across the mantle or whatever it is wealthy suburban people do to decorate their mansions for Halloween. Even though Your Mama can't fathom why anyone might want to bring a child into this world–we are at our core a socio-political cynic–we genuinely hope that Mister and Missus Rancic soon get what they want, a slew of baby Rancics running around and filling up some of the seven lonely bedrooms of their humongous house.

listing photos (Hinsdale): Coldwell Banker
listing photos (Chicago): Baird & Warner


Lilithcat said...

I never thought I'd live to see the day when Mama was blogging about a house in Hinsdale, just a stone's throw from where I work (but, thank god, don't live).

Your link to the Chicago house leads to a page with no photos, but I found some here.

Anonymous said...

Mama, could you STOP using the word POOPERS!!! Enough already

Peggasus said...

Is that the same house? Why is the front red and the back white brick?

Or is it one of the teardowns Hinsdale is so famous for? We had our office in Hinsdale for years, and many lovely old homes were torn down to make way for these monstrosities. I saw part of their show once, and they seemed kinda...normal-ish, so I don't like that they are doing this.

Anonymous said...

I love all of the houses they design, they're beautiful, the home in Hinsdale is near my home and I have seen it, and it is GORGEOUS, the nicest, refined, but not over the top home, which is hard to come by in Hinsdale

lil' gay boy said...

Who are these people? Never heard of them... but it's painfully obvious that the little missus has taken a page from the Victoria Beckham school of "nutrition".

Not to be (too) unkind, but even her head is oddly shaped; like Skeletor in Dior.

"Is that the same house? Why is the front red and the back white brick?"

You saw that too, huh? I abhor when someone uses different (re: cheaper) materials on the less-than-public façades of a home ––– it should be in the top ten on Mama's Decorating Dos & Don'ts.

Unforgivable at any price.

The bird's eye view of the Hinsdale property shows a typical overbuild in an older neighborhood; it's painfully obvious this sliver of land was the side yard of a no-longer-extant older structure, and highlights the completely incoherent, throw-it-against-the-wall-and-see-if-it-sticks school of architecture.


As for the high-rise, well, the less said the better; Mama touched on the odious art better than I could so there's no point in pummeling that particular perished pony.

Langtry said...

Poor taste is rather typical of Bill and Guiliana Rancid... err, Rancic. Perhaps if they were to tone down the publicity whore-ing, they might find it easier to start their family.

Anonymous said...


Langtry said...

Anyone else get the feeling "Anonymous" is actually Guiliana?!

Madam Pince said...

Don't judge me, Mama, but I do enjoy the Rancics' publicity-whorin' show. I was sorry to hear they'd lost their baby, although, like you, I'm not a big proponent of having chirren (I'm a member of the one-and-done club, having had the one before I had enough sense to get my tubes tied). ANYWAY ... the house is not my taste ... I agree with LGB that it's a prime example of the "throw-it-against-the-wall-and-see-if-it-sticks school of architecture." I feel cold and shivery just looking at it, which means I need to freshen up my bourbon & ginger ale.

SKH said...

I'm more interested in the other house they looked at in this episode. Looked like a modern Craftsman/Mission style house, it was lovely. Any listing available for that one? I think it was also in Hinsdale.

Anonymous said...

Umm....What kind of place is this Hinsdale that you can buy a 12 freaking thousand square foot house for 1.5 million??? I know Chicago is cheaper than NY but come on this is ridiculous. 1.5 would barely get you a normal center hall colonial in a nice part of fairfield county.

Anonymous said...

Langtry..uh yeah, me too.

Windy said...

Thankfully, the people at Fashion Police have finally and recently installed some actual fashionistas like Kelly Osbourne

Ohhh lawwdy, Mama, how much are the Osbourne's paying you for that little gem? You must be joking.

Candz said...

Nice painting of a Wal Mart rollback sticker in the dining room.

WV: Muncer. That is all.

Anonymous said...

Just my little opinion but there is no way they'll have a slew of Rancic babies unless she puts on at least 30 pounds.
As for the house, the front to back is weird.Brick in the front, stone in the back? I hope they're still bricking.

Mom2JandK said...

I grew up in Chicago & every week for 3 years my mother schlepped me a half hour each way to Hinsdale for a piano lesson. Hated it! It's been 30 years and I've never been back.
I'm not really enamored with the Rancic's either.

Anonymous said...

I hope they understand that people who have houses that large staff them with people to take care of them and the things it's owners buy.

I learned when looking at a place around the same size from my domestic staffing agency that a home that you want to be truly cared for needs a full time housekeeper for every 5000 sq. ft.

Don't mention a houseman, house manager, etc... Are they really making this kind of money? The place isn't going to take care of itself...

micanichi said...

I believe "precious little real personality" describes the entire arc of the Rancid's lives.

Anonymous said...

I grew up in Hinsdale in the 60's & 70's, the original charm of the village is long gone and so am I. Like many houses there our cape cod home was torn down and a monstrosity was built in its place - barely fits on the lot.

Anonymous said...

Doesn't Guiliana have a show every day in Los Angeles? What is she going to do, catch the red eye to Chicago on Friday night and then head back Sunday afternoon? What a life!

Anonymous said...

She's his beard isn't she? They look and act so odd around each other.

Anonymous said...

What the hell is the Miracle Mile??? And what the hell is Fairfield County? Never heard of either.

Anonymous said...

Hey anonoymous,

1.5 million for a shell of an unfinished house that was a disaster because the builder went belly up. The lot alone is worth more. Get off your high horse in Connecticut.

Anonymous said...

So they live at the Park Hyatt but on the show they try to pass it off as the Four Seasons building. So who knows if what we're seeing with the new house is actually a place they will be living or trying to launch some remodeling career for him. All very suspect if you ask me.

Also her doctor told her to gain weight to help in the baby area and she never did.

I don't doubt they love Chicago, but they are more Hoolywood wanna be's so I don't think they will ever be living in the burbs of Chicago (visit and film sure, but actually live here and not in the burbs).

Unknown said...

Wow a lot of comments. What would you say it costs for a Hinsdale builders to build a simple home? From what I can tell it's not looking to good, does anyone have some solid info for me?

Unknown said...

It is not strange that people are buying more than one house these days. Ok well, maybe for those who can actually afford more than one house, that is. People are now investing on property because of the skyrockecting prices, thus they know they can make a profit in a few years to come. Some people also use their extra house or rooms to lease out to people who might need a place to stay or a place to use as storage. This is an alternative many people make as compared to a self storage.

Anonymous said...

I can barely find ONE comment that is not full of hate and jealousy. If you people detest the Rancics, as you obviously do, why are you reading about them. You're all a sad hateful group.