Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Oksana Grigorieva is a Valley Girl

OCCUPANT: Oksana Grigorieva
OWNER: Mel Gibson
LOCATION: Sherman Oaks, CA
PURCHASE PRICE: $2,405,000
SIZE: 3,468 square feet, 4 bedrooms, 3.5 bathrooms

YOUR MAMAS NOTES: Back in January of 2009, when they were still happily carrying on a clandestine affair and long before their bitter bust up that has resulted in lurid accusations, restraining orders, allegations of extortion, and leaked audio tapes of revolting rants, Mel Gibson bought his ladee-friend Oksana Grigorieva a house in suburban Sherman Oaks, CA. Well, actually, Mister Gibson purchased the Sherman Oaks crib in which Miss Grigorieva currently lives but, property records indicate, she does not own.

In case any of the children live under one of them Luddite rocks where there aren't tee-vees or tabloids, the raven haired and large lipped Miss Grigorieva is the Russian born baby momma to two-time Oscar winning actor/producer/director Mel Gibson's 8th child. Miss Grigorieva is a pianist/singer/composer of some sort who in the late 1990s married and made a baby with British actor Timothy Dalton, best known for portraying James Bond in two of that franchise's many films.

Property records show that the newly completed residence Mister Gibson purchased for Miss Grigorieva's use, located on a cul-de-sac in the hills above Sherman Oaks, was picked up for $2,405,000 in January of 2009. This was, mind y'all, before Miss Grigorieva turned up preggers and before either of the two of them publicly copped to or confirmed their adulterous liaison.

Listing information for the property indicates that the single story Frank Lloyd Wright Prairie House meets Arts and Crafts meets Mission style residence measures 3,468 square feet and includes 4 bedrooms and 3.5 poopers. A small gate set into the somewhat forbidding and essentially windowless stone, stucco and wood facade–those clerestory windows don't count–opens into an itty-bitty courtyards that leads to the a front door, an elaborate stained glass confection with a geometric pattern that will repeat itself in various forms throughout the house.

The formal living room has hardwood floors that may or may not be mahogany, a simply designed but forceful stone fireplace that stretches up to the high beamed wood ceiling, a wall of tall mahogany trimmed French doors that open into the home's courtyard, and a trio of stained glass windows with an intricate geometric pattern. Other rooms in Miss Grigorieva's borrowed home, according to listing information, include a formal dining room and a custom, mahogany paneled library with built in corner shelving units and more geometric patterned stained glass.

The primary living area is an open plan great room sort of thing that consists of a large family room with clerestory windows and French doors that open to the home's courtyard, a casual eating area, and a large, cook's kitchen with clerestory windows, custom mahogany cabinetry inset with stained glass panels, honed black granite counter tops, a large work island with vegetable sink, and a suite of Viking brand appliances that include a mac-daddy 8-burner range and commercial style refrigerator/freezer with a glass panel door.

Miss Grigorieva's master bedroom, which Your Mama assume she once shared with her fuming and furious baby daddy Mister Gibson, has a voluminous ceiling criss-crossed by heavy mahogany beams, a long wall of mahogany trimmed French doors topped with transom windows, and a fetching fireplace with stunning period tile surround that is flanked by built in bookshelves. Miss Grigorieva's private pooper has marble tiled walls, a glass enclosed shower, large soaking tub, and a long vanity behind which is yet another geometrically patterned stained glass window.

The house wraps around and opens to a stone courtyard at the back of the house that has a gurgling, disturbingly phallic shaped fountain and built in mahogany benches. A narrow lawn stretches along the back of the house and off to one side of the courtyard, thick and chunky beams act as a sun thwarting trellis over a small patio with an outdoor fireplace and views of the San Fernando Valley and the setting sun.

The former lovers are currently locked in a pitched and savage battle that is only going to get uglier and messier once they start going to court to hash out custody agreements and financial remunerations. Miss Grigorieva signed a cohabitation agreement–essentially a pre-nup for unmarried couples who live together–that allegedly keeps the Russian mistress and baby momma from going after any of Mister Gibson's vast fortune that is often estimated at around a billion dollars. At least Mister Gibson's fortune is worth around a billion dollars until his soon to be ex-wife Robyn takes his cheating booty to the dee-vorce court cleaners and gets half of everything. Anyhoo, it's not clear whether the cohabitation agreement covers the house in Sherman Oaks and besides, Miss Grigorieva is now claiming that she only signed a draft of the agreement under duress which would, apparently, make it invalid. Blah, blah, blah...

Your Mama does not expect Miss Grigorieva to roll over and play dead while Mister Gibson tries to bring her down into the pyre of his own tattered reputation and quickly evaporating career. This is, for all her home wrecking faults, one tough bitch who really hasn't got a career to lose. If she can have her appendix removed without the aid of anesthesia, Your Mama thinks she can probably hold her own against little ol' Mister Gibson and his ridiculous tirades.

Oh lo-ward have mercy bunnies, what a tangled web Mister Gibson weaves. Your Mama wonders if he's spending a lot of time up at his private chapel in Agoura Hills begging for the get his in shambles career back. After all he's got a soon to be ex-wife, a baby momma and 8 kids to support not to mention whomever else suckles on the Gibson financial teat.

Note: The children will recognize that the photos do not show the home as it is currently furnished but rather as it appeared when it was purchased in January of 2009. The photos were provided by an anonymous source.


Syd said...

Wow, there's not much I would have changed. LOVE that kitchen.

Grrrowler said...

I can't even imagine living in Sherman Oaks, but I sort of like this house. I've always been a fan of Frank Lloyd Wright and it's interesting to see a modern interpretation of his style.

Anonymous said...

No picture of the infamous "(i'll bury you in the) rosegarden"? How about the outdoor jacuzzi where he wants to be blown first? LOL

Tee said...

The house is quite lovely.

Being from the east coast can someone fill me in on what's wrong with Sherman Oaks?

lil' gay boy said...

As an incurable "Wrightophile", it usually pains me to see an architect try to imitate Frank Lloyd Wright, even when it is a sincere homage.

This one is not a bad attempt, but the scale is way off (easier to see in these aerial photos).

Historians have argued ad infinitum about this particular quality of scale, citing FLLW's small stature as the possible reason (many of his homes were "low-ceilinged", but whether it was to accommodate his diminutive size or his cost-cutting Usonian attempts to utilize industry standard items is anyone's guess).

The art glass here is well-executed & reminiscent of those in both the Robie and Susan Lawrence Dana houses. But the stonework is too precise, the fenestration too "mix-and-match", and the palette's too bland.

But then as Mama stated, it is "...Frank Lloyd Wright Prairie House meets Arts and Crafts meets Mission Style..." and as such is a fairly successful composition.

But I still loathe the siting on a too small lot (I know, I know, shut up already about too small So-Cal parcels), almost as much as its purchaser of record.

Anonymous said...

I really don't like the house at all. It seems to me to show how dated and leaden and gloomy the Prairie Style can be, even when mixed and blended with something else. I'd hate to have to look through unclear, fussy windows and live with the weight of all that dark woodwork pushing down on me. Ugh.

Anonymous said...

And I mean the house too!

Anonymous said...

I've toured a number of FLW homes and buildings over the years, and this giant FAIL is leaving me nauseated.

Anonymous said...

the mel affair is now beyond the pop culture medium that developed it. each day, radar online produces a new tape that on some fundamental level we do not want to hear. it is beyond what we have come to comfortably think of as the "private" life made public. a career completely destroyed, no feeling that there is room for redemption or a "comeback". no, no, no, that is not what we're looking for, no matter how much we may not like mel gibson. when she (oksana) and they (radar) conspire to completely destroy, how exactly does anyone who is basically "good" live well with that one? oksana has destroyed herself, though she may not fully realize it yet, to destroy him.

Jumpin' Jejosephat in LA said...

I've never been a big fan of FLW, Arts & Crafts, or even Prairie style, other than esthetics, but dang, for some reason I find myself rubbing my scent all over this particular mashed potato. I'll be happy to find a more suitable abode for Mr. Psychiatric Poster Boy to play out his pyromaniac fantasies if he would consider brokering this domicile over to me and my hubby, along with our two short bodied bitches. At a fire sale price, natch. Only the truly ignoramus would try to Molotov cocktail a structure with so much non-flammable construction material. Oh look, we have a winner. Come on Mel, be a man for goodness sake, get over yourself and try some EST. It's a place to start anyway. That place being the meat and two veg. if you ask me.

Anonymous said...

Cute house, but...

The Valley? Why?


Carla Ridge said...

This may not be the most appropriate forum for this rant vent, but I guess I still have Hawaii (no on gay marriage) vs. Argentina (yes on gay marriage) on my mind -- kinda like the same sex world cup. Here goes: WHY on earth is it okay for people like this woman to be richly rewarded for cavorting with a man to whom she is not married, but many of the very same people who cast an approving eye on such she-nannigans are sure the world would go to Hell in a hamper if gay people were allowed to marry? Why is THIS okay with all the "Sanctity of Marriage" flock?

lil' gay boy said...

'Why is THIS okay with all the "Sanctity of Marriage" flock?'

Rant away, my dear Carla (and Yay! for Argentina, where my husband grew up).

Why is it OK? Because saner heads (like yours & mine) don't often prevail; rather those of the vulgar, narrow-minded, big checkbook-ed/big mouthed ilk do.

But here's the thing; start referring to the spouse of every straight couple you know as their "domestic partner" ––– repeatedly & often, even after they correct you ––– and see what kind of reaction you get.

Even the most "liberal" of my acquaintances loses patience after a while; at which point I gently remind them, "NOW do you get it?"

Carla Ridge said...

LGB, if I didn't already LOVE THE SHI'ITE OUTTA YOU for using my favorite FLLW diminutive (you use both the 'L's in 'Lloyd', just like I do!) -- then I do now for havin' my back on my rant vent.

Thank you, darlin', and have a lovely and blessed weekend. Heck, I wish that on all y'all!

Anonymous said...

Tee asks:

"Being from the east coast can someone fill me in on what's wrong with Sherman Oaks?"

Sherman Oaks is approximately 5 miles from the more exclusive neighborhoods, and 8 to 10 miles from the "hipper" neighborhoods. So if you're an LA snob or hipster you'd rather kill yourself than live there.

Anonymous said...

Beautiful home inside and out!

Anonymous said...

Can our beloved "Mama" dig up Mr. Dalton's digs.

Pretty, Pretty Please!!!!!