Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Alec Baldwin Seeks to Sell Two at the Eldorado

SELLER: Alec Baldwin
LOCATION: Central Park West, New York City, NY
PRICE: $7,500,000
SIZE: 3 bedrooms, 3.5 bathrooms
DESCRIPTION: Enter into an elegant gallery off your private elevator landing. The corner living room facing north and east provide astounding views, wood burning fireplace, elegant crown moldings, and a scale giving you the sense of an airy grandeur ideal for gatherings. You will also find off the gallery a formal dining room, paneled library and windowed powder room. All bedrooms have ensuite baths, two of which face directly over the park. The corner master suite facing south and east is newly refurbished offering ample closet space, built ins, surround sound and a windowed marble bath facing the park with soaking tub and separate shower. The eat in kitchen has been enlarged and is equipped with exterior ventilation over a 6 burner Viking range with double ovens, Traulsen double refrigerator, Traulsen wine storage unit, plenty of pantry space and staff room with full bath and laundry.

YOUR MAMAS NOTES: The entertainment industry Baldwin brothers have been making the celebrity real estate news rounds lately. In June of 2009 the bible beating youngest Baldwin, Stephen, lost his long time home in Upper Grandview, NY to foreclosure and this week we learn that the eldest Baldwin brother, Alec, listed his long time spread at the Eldorado building on the Upper West Side of Manhattan for sale with an asking price of $7,500,000. The asking price goes up to $8,900,000 if a buyer wants to add the 1 bedroom and 1 bathroom
apartment (plus 1 staff room and bath) Mister Baldwin also owns on the first floor.

Records and reports indicate that he wry, in demand, Oscar nominated and Emmy winning actor (30 Rock, The Departed, Running With Scissors, Will & Grace, The Cooler, Pearl Harbor...) scooped up the 3 bedroom and 3.5 pooper property at the twin towered apartment house way back in 1991 before he married Oscar winning actress Kim Basinger with whom he's, sadly and childishly, perpetually doing battle with over the custody and care of their daughter.

Listing information shows Mister Baldwin's crib occupies a full floor in one of the towers and as such has four exposures and possesses a private elevator landing that opens to a proper foyer that acts as the traffic hub for the entire apartment. Located immediately off the foyer are an oddly shaped, paneled library, a walk in coat closet and a powder pooper for guests. Your Mama is thrilled, for obvious reasons, to see that the guest terlit has a window.

Facing Central Park and the swank buildings that line Fifth Avenue are the large living room which along with mesmerizing views features a fireplace and a bunch of mismatched furniture including, much to Your Mama's sorrow and horror, one of those round, skirted tables with a table cloth that hangs all the way to the damn floor. Dollars to do-nuts kids there's nuthin' under there but a cardboard box with a round piece of plywood sitting on top. Why do people do that?

Anyhoo, also facing the park are two of the three principal bedrooms including the newly refurbished corner master bedroom with double exposures for maximum ventilation, a marble pooper with a window (also, for obvious reasons, good for the ventilation), 2 small walk-in closets plus five more custom built closets that wrap around the outside wall. All those closet doors opening into the bedroom can't be good for the feng shui and as expensive as it might be, all that feminine, cornflower blue bed clothing needs to be shoved down the trash chute toot suite because, really, Mister Baldwin, you deserve better than this.

Through the formal dining room where Mister Baldwin has a Biedermeier-esque dining room set and a wacky lantern style chandelier is the eat in kitchen. While the kitchen looks oddly configured in the floor plan, listing information indicates it is none the less well equipped with a six-burner mac-daddy Viking range, a heavy duty (and very expensive) Traulsen brand double refrigerator as well as a Traulsen wine fridge. Tucked away behind the large pantry is a closet with a stacked washer and dryer (not the ideal location, but Svetlana would appreciate not having to hang around in the basement folding Your Mama and the Dr. Cooter's undergarments with the other house gurls) and a wee, seven foot wide staff room and wee bathroom with a wee window that is, of course, good for airing things out after doing the dirty bizness.

On the first floor of the building is a smaller apartment also owned by Mister Baldwin and offered for sale in combination with his much larger 22nd floor unit. It's unknown to Your Mama, who really doesn't know much of anything at all, how Mister Baldwin uses these rooms. Perhaps this is where his "office" is located? Perhaps this is where he stashed Miz Basinger post dee-vorce? Perhaps this is where he entertains ladee friends and others whom he does not want in his actual apartment? Who knows? Whatever the case, Mister Baldwin's second unit is a well laid out 1 bedroom and 1 pooper apartment with a nice sized foyer, a 27 and a half foot long living room, eat-in kitchen and a separate staff room and pooper. The drawbacks to this place are that it's at ground level and that it lacks adequate closet space. However, we think a nice dressing room could easily be added to the bedroom with little trouble or expense and a bit of reconfiguring in the kitchen/service entrance area would provide for a better floor and more storage.

The Emory Roth designed and geometrically ornamented Eldorado building, some of the children will recall, is the very same building where Prairie Home Companion curmudgeon Garrison Keillor picked up a pied a terre in June of 2006 for $3,600,000 and where diminutive musician Moby sold a quirky quadraplex penthouse apartment last summer for $6,700,000.

It's perhaps not such a surprise to celebrity real estate watchers that Mister Baldwin desires to dump his aerie at the Eldorado given that he's been spotted peeping at pricey apartments at the Apthorp as well twice touring a sprawling, $12,500,000 4 bedroom apartment at The Dakota where residents include a lot of fancy financial industry bigwigs as well as singer Roberta Flack and artist Yoko Ono. As an aside, here's something we somehow failed to notice last fall...It was widely reported in September of 2008 that hot mess Lindsay Lohan had the hair brained notion that she might be able to slip past the board at The Dakota and set up a lesbian love nest with her on again off again on again off again ladee friend Samantha Ronson. It was even reported in the British tabs that Miss Lohan and Miss Ronson were planning on a 12 foot circular bed with a leopard print headboard, a DJ area with a disco ball and bathrooms with "Hers" and "Hers." towels. Pleeze. Who makes this stuff up? Seriously, who?

But we digress. Wherever Mister Baldwin may land once he unloads his apartment(s) at the Eldorado, Your Mama sincerely hopes he'll use some of his considerable riches to hire a nice gay decorator to work out the interiors because it is Your Mama's humble and utterly meaningless opinion that he deserves better day-core than a living room that looks like a tired suite at the Waldorf. If you need a recommendation for someone Mister Baldwin, ring Your Mama and we'll hook you up with someone who can turn your new apartment out like nobodies bizness.


StPaulSnowman said...

LOCATION, LOCATION, POTENTIAL GALORE! The interiors are so mediocre that even a lowball offer might be entertained. After Mama's post I am confident that the local NGDs will be swarming to get a crack at this great space. I liked the little stuffed chair in the bedroom where Mr. Baldwin undoubtedly wrestles on his support stockings each morning. His 30 Rock character is hilarious, his delivery flawless and his little bloated eyelids perfectly convey his character's ennui. A great show! He deserves his new perch at the Apthorp.

Anonymous said...

What this post needs is MORE COWBELL (bathroom humor) chickens.

Anonymous said...

Wouldnt the Apthorp be a step down? Is that conversion even happening?

marisa125 said...

Despite that *minor* public relations nightmare a few years ago with a certain phone message, I find Meester Baldwin nothing short of a fine and funny actor (re-watched Notting Hill and forgot he plays the boyfriend: "I don't want anyone to say, 'There goes that actor with the fat girlfriend'" -- priceless jerk delivery).

The interiors seem to have a Southern, conservative vibe to them ... a la his ex-missus Kim Basinger maybe? Though I sincerely believe the first step to closure in a relationship is getting rid of the former's decor (and settling child custody disputes pronto), these fixins don't match the Mr. Baldwin I know and appreciate -- from a distance, of course.

Anonymous said...

Alec's apartment(s) definitely needs redecorating, but I'm in agreement with StPaulSnowman: this is a pre-war, full floor tower apartment, on Central Park West, in a storied apartment building, owned by famous actor. Some might not care about who the current owner is, but all of those other factors will keep agent's Blackberrys ringing because the MWMIM (millionaires who matter in Manhattan) will want to have a looksy-poo at this home. These pre-war pads are rare and you can't reproduce the provenance and patina of these beauties in new construction condos.

Kissyface said...

Believe it or not, Jackie Kennedy inserted an especially ugly and overworked version of "one of those round, skirted tables with a table cloth that hangs all the way to the damn floor" in the Blue Room when she had "Henry DuPont, a well-connected collector of Americana and Stéphane Boudin, a respected Parisian designer of the House of Jansen", (quote from the WH Museuem site) perpetrate her redecoration of the White House.

Don't believe it? Think taste couldn't have been that bad in that quarter in the early 1960's? Well, seeing is believing. Scroll down on this White House museum site web page [] until you come to the picture of the table with the heavy gold fabric that groans under no fewer than FIVE rows of cheesy tapestry tassels on its way to the floor. The picture is captioned: "The Blue Room in 1962 (White House Historical Association)."

Caution: You may want to be fortified with a double gin-and-tonic beofore attempting this maneuver.

Anonymous said...

Very glad to see that what Mr. Baldwin has or does is of so little interest to readers. The man (and I use the term loosely) has made a second career out of harassing, abusing, and making the lives of his ex and only child miserable. He's a stinking, misogynist bum.

Anonymous said...

If this is the Baldwin brother I see commenting on movies for TCM I can see with my own eyes that he has made good use of being able to eat in the kitchen, where he can get at the food very rapidly.