Tuesday, February 17, 2009

Deborah Gibson Taking A Hit in the Hollywood Hills

SELLER: Deborah Gibson
LOCATION: Forest Knoll Drive, Los Angeles, CA
PRICE: $995,000
SIZE: 1,733 square feet, 2 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms
DESCRIPTION: Fabulous designer home in Hollywood Hills above Sunset Strip. Beautiful chef's kitchen, stainless steel app, slate/tile baths, formal dining, den and wonderful backyard for pool. Very private. Offer subject to short sale.

YOUR MAMAS NOTES: Surely all the children who are older than 25 remember 1980s teen singing sensation Debbie Gibson and her radio friendly pop songs that had clean cut teenagers everywhere tapping their feet and snapping their little fingers. We do.

However, that sort of wholesome pop crap was never Your Mama's musical cup of tea. None the less, we do recognize that–for better or worse–the young Debbie Gibson paved the way for all the other teen aged gurls like Britney Spears, Jessica Simpson and Christina Aguilera who were tarted up just this side of looking like a hooker and sent out on stage to wiggle and woo the dollars out of the wallets of the parents of tweenagers around the world.

Debbie Gibson the teen superstar singer grew up to become Deborah Gibson who trod the boards on Broadway (Beauty and the Beast, Les Miserables, Grease, Chicago) and exposed her boobs to the world in the March 2005 issue of Playboy. More recently she took a not so successful spin on the disturbing Skating With Celebrities reality show disaster, created a children's camp in Los Angeles for aspiring performers called, natch, Camp Electric Youth, worked the stage in Atlantic City where she sang her 1980s hits mixed with Broadway standards and became an icon for a certain sort of homosexual.

She also set up house in the Hollywood Hills where property records show in February of 2005 Miss Gibson paid $1,275,000 for a modest house just off curvy, swervy and dangerous to drive Sunset Plaza Drive. Records show the Forest Knoll Drive house measures 1,733 square feet and listing information indicates there are two bedrooms and 2 bathrooms, one of which appears to have a stand up urinal installed, an apparatus we don't imagine Miss Gibson used much.

Listing information shows that Miss Gibson has recently listed her house for sale with an asking price of $995,000. A few flicks of the well worn beads on our bejeweled abacus reveals that figure to be a full $280,000 less than she paid for the house. Oh dear.

Miss Gibson's Hollywood Hills hideaway is well screened from the street offering the once blisteringly famous now just sorta famous woman all the privacy she wants and requires. Adjacent to the detached two car garage, a long, lung busting flight of stairs rises from street level to the front door. We're sure this is an excellent feature for helping Miss Gibson keep her pushing 40 booty tight, but frankly, Your Mama would rather have a fat ass than have to climb all those damn stairs every damn day just to get to the damn front door.

A small entrance hall opens to the living room which features wood floors, a wood burning fireplace and a large bay window looking out over that glute grinding flight of stairs. The children will note that in addition to Miss Gibson's depressing melange of furniture that all looks like it came from Grandma's house in Missouri, Miss Gibson has not very modestly hung a lot of her own showbiz memorabilia on the walls. The mirrored piano, which by our humble and meaningless estimation, is the only fabulous thing in this room and was once owned by flamboyant entertainer Liberace and makes a very strong and deliciously campy decorative statement at one end of the room.

Opposite the living room is a decent sized and wood floored dining room which has been painted that particular sort of blood red that many people think looks great in dining rooms. A large country-style breakfront holds all Miss Gibson's finer dinnerware and it appears that Miss Gibson has inexplicably hung a blanket over the window. Maybe it really is a shade or a curtain of some sort, but it looks like a damn blanket.

Listing information indicates the kitchen is suitable for a chef and perhaps it is. We can't get over the pot rack hanging over the work island to determine if a chef would want to be cooking up in there. Is there anything worse than cutting carrots and slicing celery while having to look at a bunch of dusty pots hanging from the ceiling? Ugh.

From the look of things, Miss Gibson's real estate agent showed up unannounced to take photos for the listing because there is no other legitimate way to explain the utter catastrophe that is the bedroom where the tee-vee has been left on, a vanity table looks a hot mess, a purse has been left on the bed and Miss Gibson's fuzzy slippers have not been placed in the closet or under the bed where they belong in a real estate listing photo. The main bathroom is no better. In fact, it's worse. An over-stuffed valise sits on a chair gaping open and the counter tops are littered with toiletries, make-up implements and a 7-Up soda can. A 7-Up can! Classy.

Seriously Miss Gibson, listen to Your Mama because we are sincerely trying to help you here. Not only is your house is being offered as a short sale, meaning you're likely going to have to beg your bank to accept a purchase price that is less than you owe, public records show a Notice of Default was filed on the property in early January which means that you gotta get rid of this place as soon as possible before you slip down the rabbit hole of foreclosure. Now hunny, we don't now if anyone has told you, but the real estate market in Los Angeles isn't as brisk as it was a few years ago and as a result it is extremely important to put your best real estate foot forward when trying to attract skittish and/or bottom feeding buyers. And that means, of course, that you need to clean up all your crap, call Your Mama so we can send our domineering house gurl Svetlana over to scrub the place down like it was a surgical suite and have your real estate agent come back over to snap new photographs that present your little crib in its the best possible light. Now is not the time to be leaving the house with bread crumbs on the kitchen counter or skid marks in your terlit.

Now then, one thing that may work in your favor is that the (slightly smaller) house next door sold in December of 2008 for $1,150,000 which makes your current asking price of $995,000 look at least in the ball park. Your Mama never likes to see anyone lose their house in a distress sale and just because we're mortified by the condition of your house in the listing photographs does not mean we don't feel for you or that we have any desire to dance on your real estate grave. We honestly wish you fortitude, dignity and a strong constitution during this ugly short sale process.

78 comments:

StPaulSnowman said...

Oh Mama..........unless you jest you have broken my heart. How could you possibly think that a mirrored piano is fabulous. I don't know how you could think a musical instrument designed to distract from the sound it creates is anything but hideous. I respect your opinion........educate me!.....what makes you like it? Thanks.

Anonymous said...

So I guess a home in compton is not worth a million anymore ?

just sayin

:)

Anonymous said...

So I guess a home in compton is not worth a million anymore ?

just sayin

:)

Anonymous said...

The urinal says it all.

She pissed her money away on this one. She is not a good flipper!

Anonymous said...

usually i laugh at stuff like this but for some reason it's sort of sad.

Anonymous said...

the reason she did not clean the house is most likely because as a short sale she is probably not going to see one penny - it will all go to the bank. I am still REELING from the urinal.

Anonymous said...

I know her mother/manager lives in Saddle River, NJ or did a couple years ago at least. She also has a condo or co-op in the far west village I believe. Perhaps she doesn't need the west coast pad anymore and doesn't care if she loses some money here.

Anonymous said...

Who would want to site on the can and stare into a urinal? That's just gross.

Anonymous said...

Oh, Mama. When I cast my eyes on that bedroom, I knew your post was going to be good. But you really outdid youself... "there is no other legitimate way to explain the utter catastrophe." Luvsit.

Anonymous said...

Does she pee standing up???

Anonymous said...

Wow wow wow. What a piece of crap. The interior looks like an $89,000 co-op in Yonkers with "upgrades". Good job Debbie!

Anonymous said...

As many anonymous folks have duly noted, the urinal is the not sweet spot of this home. Then again, I cannot tell if there's a sweet spot or not.

The realtor should be fired for allowing photos like this to be published. And while I used to pray that I would someday insert my man meat inside Debbie Gibson's pooper for some extra-curricular activities, I'm completely turned off after seeing what a slob she is and what poor decorating sense she has. Even me, a straight man from Pasadena, can do better than this.

Anonymous said...

Yikes, that urinal is thee most upsetting thing evah... I can smell the lingering odor of urine and I'm in damn South Florida for Charlie Crists sake!!! Dayum gurl, git yourself a freakin maid or cleaning lady pronto cause I think Svetlana would head for the higher hills...

Mike Cook said...

Egads.

Anonymous said...

4 years of ownership isn't a flip.

From the looks of things, someone did some "fancy" remodeling on that bath. Not just the urinal but the toilet have sensor panels to flush them and the one on the toilet is half taken apart. Looks like something average idiot would have in his house...."just saying".

I suspect there is a back story on this place that we haven't heard yet.

Anonymous said...

Good luck sell this Shack!

Anonymous said...

Really, really bad.

I happen to be a fan of the in house urinal...but I'm a dude...so at least I have a legitimate use for it. Debbie Gibson is not married and the urinal is in the worst imaginable spot, so I really don't know what she was thinking.

Furthermore, that's one helluva cluttered house. I understand trying to go for the 'shabby chic' look...but this place just looks like a total dump.

Good luck to her, it's never good to lose a home, hopefully it doesn't fall into foreclosure.

Anonymous said...

This gives new meaning to the term "Hot Mess." Keep up the great work mama!

Anonymous said...

Mama, I think the curtain in the kitchen is an American flag covering a window a/c unit. Also did anyone notice in the bedroom, it looks like the little dog is taking a dump?

This is an all-time new low.

Anonymous said...

OMG, these are the worst real estate photos ever! The closet doors are hanging open, the cabinet doors are hanging open, one shutter closed, one open, the rooms are a mess. Let's hope DG only owns the house, but doesn't live there. Maybe she rents is out to a slob?...

Anonymous said...

What's the dog chewing on? Looking at the rest of this dump, I'd say it's probably a pair of her soiled panties. I can SMELL this house just by looking at the picts. Simply unbelievable.

Anonymous said...

Everyone is ragging on the inside.

The outside is just as bad. The hills are covered in rat loving ivy and ugly ground cover. This hill-side area is know for it's rats!

You need a couple of cats if you buy this place.

Anonymous said...

The perfect place for a beer kegger party.

Stock up on the urinal soap!

Anonymous said...

Fire that Realtor. I can not believe that she allowed those photos to be made public. Shit on the counters, clutter all over, bad lighting and more. What a loser of a Realtor. From one GOOD Realtor to another....get out of the business.

Anonymous said...

Why diss us when you should be dissing your own rat.......Josh Flagg? At least we stay in the ivy!

Anonymous said...

11:54 AM

I agree.

Good luck selling this shack!

Village said...

The realtor already has a buyer, who does not want to get into a price war with anyone attracted by the listing. Mission Accomplished

Check out that bathroom tile. Wall, floor, above urinal, all ugly, and nothing matches.

The buyer is going to have to gut the bathroom to remove the urinal anyway.

Royal said...

I'm fairly certain that the commode and urinal are not equipped with automatic flush. It looks like the commode is a tankless model with the innards in the wall, and I'm guessing the urinal is the same--though if I'm right then I don't know where the handle to flush the urinal is located. The tankless toilet looks to be not functioning correctly (leaking?!) which would explain why the tiles have been removed to gain access.

I also join the chorus of "fire the realtor", regardless of whether or not there is a buyer already lined up.

Pookie said...

this breaks my heart, it really does.

i'm sure DG has elsewhere to live...but the fact is this looks pretty lived-in to me....eep, and a short sale. :( girl is hurting.

no need to be sloppy tho. eeek. clean that place up!

pch said...

Though I love the idea of a urinal, I hate it when people mess with vintage bathrooms and kitchens, which are usually the highlights of a vintage bungalow like this. For me.

Not too far up Sunset Plaza, if it's where I think it is, so a decent location. I was about about to agree with Mama about preferring downslopes to upslopes when I remembered she doesn't care for stairs, period. At least on a downslope the main floor is usually at street level...

Debbie Gibson makes me think of junior high dances. Wasn't the big thing about her that she also produced her songs? Or maybe that was an invention of her PR people, didn't think to question it when I was 12.

Anonymous said...

Mama, can I borrow a nerve pill? And maybe a shot of your gin to go with it too. This place is actually making Nick Carter's Mulholland pre-staged bedroom look good by comparison, and that's saying something. Whewww. I was never into Gibson, but as I recall, she always looked and seemed well put together. How times change..

Anonymous said...

Mama, thanks for featuring my crib on your website!

Anonymous said...

Someone was so lazy they couldn't have taken the 30 seconds and dumped that shit to the other side of the room while a photo was taken???

I guess they didn't want to disturb this "celebrity's" personal belongings.

Anonymous said...

Mama, in your old age your getting way too nice. I guess you were a fan and had her posters all over your wall. The urinal would be nice in a workshop or rec room where they didn't want to run pipes in the floor, but damn to advertise it as a selling point on the MLS. 20 years in Hollywood and your in default--now that is sad.

Mama's black sheep in WEHO

Anonymous said...

this isnt shabby chic, its just plain shabby.
ps-nice urnal

Anonymous said...

urinal*

Anonymous said...

What looks like a tile 4x larger than the rest with a small black square is the panel for the "touchless" toilet and urinal. The panel is off the toilet and sitting on the toilet. The sensor is infrared.

Anonymous said...

Someone should find her mother and slap the crap out of her for not raising that girl right.

Every stick of that furniture was moved into that house voluntarily after 2005. Yet, it looks like she lost a bet with some hobo whore at the local swap-o-rama.

Debbie, I say this with love; I hope we can blame this on substance abuse. There are so many anonymous programs that will help - but you have to want help.

Anonymous said...

Mama - please tell me which "certain sort of homosexual" would still be a fan of DG's after viewing these pics. I know you travel in wider circles than I, but PUH-LEEZ!!!

I'm trying very hard to keep up my (Chinese) New Years resolution to find the positives. CUTE DOG!!

Anonymous said...

A couple with AIDS used to live in this places - late 90's

Anonymous said...

Begone Wikibuttplug!

Anonymous said...

what a dump. CLEAN YOUR HOUSE.

I agree, the agent should get the boot for even allowing these pics to be taken.

Anonymous said...

It looks like a cat to me. Not a dog?

Anonymous said...

A mirror above the urinal? WTF? So many things wrong and so many great comments, but the overriding consensus must be...FIRE THE REALTOR!

Anonymous said...

I think an earlier respondent had it right...Debbie Gibson stands to lose a bundle on this house, its a forced sale, all proceeds will go to the bank...why should she go out of her way to clean it up? If it doesn't sell, it could get buy her a few more weeks in the house...And a realtor certainly wouldn't have permission to touch her personal belongings i.e. clean up. Why doesn't she just ask her father, Mel, for some cash?

Anonymous said...

Oh, this is depressing. I do not understand the mindset of any realtor thinking this was photo ready. Given the presence of the dog, I assume DG was in town and could have imposed some order on the mess. The property and the interior are grim.

Yes, Mama, please tell what sort of homosexual is a fan of DG?

EsslingVier

Anonymous said...

Fun Fact: Due to her major (make that MAJOR) gambling dept, Lil' Debbie Gibson was forced to rent this place out to a drag queen named Selma Candy. Selma used to supplement a modest income from his nightly performances at the Queen Mary by producing porn. Hence the mirrored piano for rehearsals and the urinal... more than a prop really. Practically a character itself! Anyways, Selma did a whole series of Lil' Deb inspired porn novelas (as he referred to them in his deposition) that were made starting around 1999. "Glory Hole" 1 through 5 were directed very much in the John Waters/Andy Warhol style. Tacky, yes. But of a particularly interesting style by most accounts. I have to admit, they were very unique to the porn industry. Well, needless to say many in the biz had high hopes of the whole notion of porn going off in a new direction. And who would have thunk... all because of Selma Candy. Who would have never (!) gotten anywhere without the backing of Lil'Deb. Of course, things really started to fall apart for Selma and Lil'Deb by 2002 when my own production company (you'll recall the now defunct"Cock-Eyed Productions") got into a nasty legal battle over the the intellectual property rights to "Glory Hole 5;" An obvious rip off of my production of "Lord of the Cock Ring." And yes, I know one doesn't think "intellectual" anything when it comes to porn, let alone to Selma Candy. Okay, long story made short (and its too late for that), a settlement was reached by arbitration not too long ago. All of which explains the sale of this house, and my pending lease of new production office space. I'm sure Mama wouldn't approve, but some of my fans will absolutely love what I've planned for my new film - "Stimulated Package."

Anonymous said...

11:22am Anon:
You need to calm down and treat Your Mama with a little more respect. Even though you don't like this home and may not agree with Your Mama's review, you don't use that foul language up in here. Apologize now, please.

Anonymous said...

anon 8:58 - I'm pretty sure it's a dog by the looks of its tail.

I do love the piano

Anonymous said...

All of you seem to be missing the very important fact that the mirrored piano used to belong to Liberace. LIBERACE! Come on! That makes it great.

It's not supposed to be some statement about current design trends. It's supposed to be Liberace's piano. Do any of you have as sense of humor about interiors?

I'd take that thing in a heartbeat.

Anonymous said...

Almost a million dollars for 1,700 square feet. I would say prices are still up there in So. Calif. Take that money to most other states and you can get 5,000 sq. feet........

StPaulSnowman said...

Trudy dear; You would, by the same logic, find a mason jar full of Liberace's toenail clippings a good design statement?

Anonymous said...

My Dear Snowman,

To compare a jar of toenails to a mirrored piano is really reaching and seems rather silly.

I can understand that you many not want a mirrored piano and I can understand that you may think Liberace was nothing but a flaming fool.

But that does not mean that his outrageous costumes, bizarre onstage antics and mirrored pianos do not hold a place in the history of show business.

You're simply being contrary and I fear you're giving other in your great state of MN a bad name with your inability to see beyond anything traditional.

Don't get me wrong, I think you've got great insights and comments, but it would be nice if you'd at least open you mind to the notion that not all people who don't want to live in a historic house in St. Paul are without taste or style.

Thank you.

StPaulSnowman said...

Trudy..........everything you say is a valid criticism. i am a prisoner of passion when it comes to traditional residential architecture. When I try to follow your advice and open my mind to the mirrored piano I simply can't help going on to the sequin-studded suits, bad facelift, mouth full of porcelain veneers and overly arpeggiated arrangements of popular songs. Generations of blue rinse fans cannot be wrong. I admit it......I am an Alfred Brendel guy rather than a Liberace guy. I will work on it! Oh.............most Minnesotans would much prefer a contemporary lakeside home to a drafty old relic and I know I am in the minority. I hope you and the Mr. sell the New York place quickly and for your full asking price. Kind regards, Snowman

Anonymous said...

$1M would get you 1,000 sf in NYC, if that, and no yard, in a so-so building.

InALittleMinute said...

I wonder how tiny the closets have to be, if you HAVE to hang 3 of your outfits on the wall.

OR

IF these were your 3 best outfits to "display" yikes! Get yourself to the nearest Wal-Mart and "upgrade".

StPaulSnowman said...

Inalittleminute........those Minnesota photos on your profile are very beautiful. I don't suppose there is ice fishing in Australia.

Anonymous said...

I bet she uses that 7-up can as an ashtray.

Anonymous said...

So does this mean no new CD for a while?

Anonymous said...

Oh my god I think she has more worries right now then a new album. More like where will she live. I truely feel bad and sorry for her. I still remember who she was 20 years ago. It's like whoever did this really wanted to Punk her and they did. I agree she should of cleaned up before taking the pics.

Anonymous said...

i gotta go poop. DONT SAY SWEARS IN THE COMMENTS CAUSE KIDS LOOK AT THEM!!!

Anonymous said...

You guys are a bunch of vicious magpies. So I guess everyone here has perfect homes ALL THE TIME?

Ching said...

Urinal? Debbie Gibson has a penis?!

Anonymous said...

No Anon. up there at 3:11...I don't have a perfect house ALL THE TIME, but I DO find the time to clean it up when a real estate agent comes over to TAKE PICTURES FOR THE MLS.

Anonymous said...

I love clothing wall art!!!!!

Anonymous said...

Who the hell is Deborah Gibson? Was she that girl on Blossom?

Anonymous said...

How did everyone miss the dog in front of the piano? What is it chewing on? Debbie's underwear?

Anonymous said...

Hey at least the Dog is trying to give a Paw & help clean up,mabey pet's are her clean-up crew?why dose the piano look like pieces of Mirror are missing & mabey it's Not a Urinal,but a Barf Bowl so U don't have to get down on dirty floor..

Anonymous said...

You people are mean. Just a regular home, so what?

Anonymous said...

So what it just looks like a regular house to me. What does everyone's homes here look like right now? Leave the poor woman alone. Clearly she's broke, Heck I paid $30 a pop a few years ago for her homemade CD-R albums, but man, her house isn'y funny peoples.

Anonymous said...

This place is depressing. Why would a realtor use those pics?!! Eeek!

Anonymous said...

Notice the urinal and the toilet have the infra-red automatic flusher. Looks like the on on the toilet is broke, as the cover is off. I'd hate to have to sit and stare at the urinal though!

Hope it all works out for her, I've met her a few times and seems like a great person.

Anonymous said...

"Now is not the time to be leaving the house with bread crumbs on the kitchen counter or skid marks in your terlit."

lol!

Anonymous said...

The interior of this home is sweet, cozy and comfortable!

SternEdwards said...

Debbie should fire her real estate agent immediately. No decent agent would allow photos as crummy as these be shown to the public.

Anonymous said...

Why don't you people get a life. Who gives a SHIT about a not so perfect house. Do any of you know about depression, if that's the case, of financial difficulties? Debbie is famous. Leave her alone. At least she's got something to sell.

Anonymous said...

I don't think it's that bad. Honestly it's just a soda can and the tv was left on. I don't think everyone keeps their house spot clean. Obv the real estate agent should have given notice about the photos. And yes, DG could have better taste or a designer but not everyone likes the same things. Some of us just have better taste!

Unknown said...

This is the first celebrity house that I have seen my mama covered which is out of the ordinary. I usually see huge and spacious mansions with an abundance of space that makes the room neat and tidy with that fresh and airy atmosphere. However, this place here needs a lot of decluttering ideas. This is especially true for the kitchen that lacks concealed storage compartments like cabinets or at least storage boxes and that in turn makes the entire room looks so messy and cluttered. Perhaps there is a certain percentage of popularity you need before you can achieve all that.