Tuesday, July 15, 2008

Mid-Week Mish Mash

Not only did Olivia Newton John recently make a rather curious and somewhat stiff appearance on Kathy Griffin's Life on the D List and quietly tie the marriage knot with wellness oriented bizness man John Easterling, the tragedy touched singer/actress has finally gotten fizz-i-cuhl with the asking price of her Malee-boo mansion which has been on the market since January of 2008.

Tucked up into the rear section of in the rich and famous friendly guard gated enclave called the Serra Retreat, Miz Newton John first listed her not very appealingly decorated 6,482 square foot house in December of 2007 with an asking price of $14,000,000. She later lowered the price for the 5 bedroom and 6 bathroom manse to $12,950,000 (see third item), and just recently the Aussie icon slashed another million clams off the price bringing the asking price to its current $11,950,000.

Perhaps the new and improved price will Grease the wheels of a few deep pocketed buyers who like the idea of neighboring up to the other residents of Retreat Court who include Oscar winning director James Cameron (Titanic, Terminator franchise), who owns the titanic two house compound across the street, and writer/director/producer Stephen Sommers (Van Helsing, The Mummy franchise) who bought the house next door from Britney Spears and her ex-huzband Kevin Federline in August of 2007 for $10,000,000.

Speaking of that Spears gurl, the Tarzana house where white rapper turned ack-tor Kevin Federline decamped after being booted from the couple's above mentioned mansion in Malee-boo has hit the market with an asking price of $1,890,000. Yes children, it was in front of this very house that the unfortunately shorn and mentally unstable Miss Spears had her infamous and major meltdown when she attacked a pap's motor vehicle with an umbrella.

Mister Federline, who Your Mama thinks has a bad habit of making babies with ladees he does not want to be with, has moved on to another leased property in Tarzana where he has primary custody of the two Spears spawn while the much on the mend Miss Spears is rumored and reported to be high tailing out of her guard gated Bev Hills community for another guard gated community in the suburban wilds of Calabasas. Blah, blah, blah. We shall see.

In other Tarzana celebrity real estate news...

Although the $2,230,000 listing for Oscar winning actor Jamie Foxx's super sexxed up 3 bedroom and 3.25 bathroom bachelor pad on Tarzana's Van Alden Drive is still marked "active" in the MLS, a local denizen of that hotter than Hades town recently whispered in Your Mama's big ear that a sign has popped up outside the tall wall at the front of the property that indicates the house is in contract. Your Mama is not about to get in our big BMW and waste the gasoline to drive out to Tarzana to verify that bit of gossip, so at this point we don't recommend repeating that like it's gospel.

Notorious ladees man and boobie grabber Mister Foxx is selling his long time party pad at least in part due to his recent purchase of a lavish and sprawling 40 acre spread out in Thousand Oaks, CA where he can happily host all the nekkid basketball games his little heart and private parts desire without offending his damn neighbors.

It's been a long time since Your Mama has heard hide or hair from our always well informed informant Kenny Kissintell. However, we recently received a wee missive from the catty chatter with some scuttlebutt about the 7,100 square foot Bev Hills fixer upper that uber-agent Kevin Huvane has been trying to flip for a profit since at least the summer of 2007. Remember this house children? Mister Hoo-vain bought it back in December of 2003 but as far as we know never spent a single night in the rehab needing residence. The 6 bedroom and 7 bathroom manor house occupies a perfectly situated 1.44 acre parcel in a choice corner of Bev Hills just up behind the new Tom Crooz compound on Calle Vista Drive. However, while it's undeniably perfectly located for all the bigwig industry types who pilot their mammoth Mercedes' to high powered meetings up and down Wilshire Boulevard, the house is also in need of a full scale multi-million dollar renovation...at least that's what Your Mama hears from a well placed real estate agent who works the better streets of Bev Hills and would be in the position to know.

Anyhoo, although we can not verify the information, Mister Kissintell first whispered to Your Mama that he heard through the high end real estate gossip grapevine that thirty something year old entrepreneur Sam Nazarian "was far down along the road" towards buying the Calle Vista casa but backed out. The children will recall that it was young and successful Mister Nazarian who bought the big contemporary crib in The Summit from super rich and shameless self-promoter Jennifer Lopez Noa Judd Anthony and less than two years later sold the 9,001 square foot sprawler to rock star and fashion icon Gwen Stefani and her handsome huzband Gavin Rossdale for a blistering $13,250,000.

Our Mister Kissintell did not stop dishing the real estate dirt there. Oh no. He also told Your Mama that he heard from several unidentified sources that Mister Hoo-vain's house–currently listed at $14,950,000 (reduced from $15,950,000)–was THISCLOSE to being snapped up by recent Hollywood dee-vorcee Jamie Tisch who Your Mama imagines walked away from her marriage to mega rich super producer Steve Tisch (Risky Business, Forrest Gump, Snatch, The Pursuit of Happyness and etc.) with plenty of cash to do over and do up this dilapidated domicile in high style. A few weeks ago Your Mama did notice the listing was marked "Looking for Backup," but as of today, it's back to being marked "active." Perhaps the ex-Mrs. Tisch's perfectly manicured feet got cold just like Mister Nazarian's allegedly did before her?

The heavenly house in the Hollywood Hills being sold by screenwriter Naomi Foner and boob toob director Steven Gyllenhaal–who are Jake and Maggie's parents, natch–is officially (and strangely) languishing on the market. First listed at the beginning of 2008 with an asking price of $4,200,000, listing information now shows that the price has been given a $700,000+ haircut to its current asking price of $3,495,000. Unfortunately Your Mama and the Dr. Cooter's price range does not stretch into the three millions because we'd be moving our sour pussy Sugar and long bodied bitches Linda and Beverly into this wood and glass extravaganza faster than the Gyllenhaals could shout, "Martha's Vineyard!"

Speaking of houses Your Mama and the Dr. Cooter have cottoned to, it appears that good lookin' actor Enrique Murciano (Without a Trace) may have unloaded his 3 bedroom and 2.5 bathroom house on Hillside Avenue in Los Angeles which was listed at $1,795,000. Although the modestly sized and located property needs a few obvious tweaks including pulling up the puzzlingly pavered driveway and working over the not so great kitchen and bathrooms, Your Mama and the Dr. Cooter found this house to be most agreeable because of its many inviting outdoor spaces and high hedges ensuring absolute privacy when parading around the backyard in the nood, which of course, we like to do.


Anonymous said...

What a basketful of information.........it sure is handy having Mama in the eastern time zone so that we in the heartland get our fix nice and early.

Mike Cook said...

Man, that Huvane house is my kinda pile. Beautiful.

Anonymous said...

didnt the britney incident happen at a gas station? YES it did

Anonymous said...

Mr. Huvane's Calle Vista fixer is still substantially overpriced despite the price cut. The extensive amount of renovation it needs speaks for itself. Wake up fella - it's not the same market it was when you sold Stefani your last house, and even it was in FAR better shape.

Anonymous said...

huvane didnt sell stefani her how, nazarian did, get your story straight.