Saturday, April 5, 2008

UPDATE: Jessica Simpson

Turns out it wasn't blond bomber Jessica Simpson who bought Nashville's Queen of Northumberland after was Aussie country crooner Keith Urban and his prodigiously paid ack-truss wifey Nicole Kidman. At least that's what the fine folks at the Nashville Post are now reporting.

Apparently the couple wanted a modest little place to bunk and bed down while they build their dream home on the 36 acre spread they purchased last year in bucolic and celebrity laden Leiper's Fork outside of Nashville.

According to Nashville Post, the Down Under duo paid $3,470,000 for the 10,925 square foot house in a guard gated community that Your Mama was told by a talkative local is secured like Fort Knox. Which means that any of you people have the damn fool idea to get into your hoopdy-mobiles and drive by for a look-see at the famous folks you will find that your efforts, besides being stoopid, will prove to be nuthin' but a waste of very expensive gasoline.

The retiring Miz Ruth Ryon at the L.A. Times' Hot Properties column also reported this weekend that Mister and Missus Urban, who are expecting a baby Urban in July, also forked over around $7,000,000 for a 5,600 square foot house in Los Angeles' Brentwood area. Your Mama hasn't had the time to sort out which house they purchased and we bet we'll be beat to the punch on that one by Mister Big Time, but whatever the case, it's clear these two have major moolah to be dropping well over $10,000,000 on real estate in the last year.

Not that anyone pays Your Mama any mind whatsoever, but we think this house is just too damn big for a budding family of three–not counting Miz Kidman's adopted children from her marriage to that ka-razy Tom Crooz fella. But at least we won't be driven to the devil's drink by imagining that poor unlucky in love Jessica Simpson roaming around that big ol' house all by her lonesome.

Your Mama hears from the Tennessee Talker that when in Nashville Miss Simpson actually holes up in a rented condo at The Enclave. But unless Miss Simpson wants to ring Your Mama on the bat phone to give us the what's what, we can't confirm her Nashville whereabouts beyond just rumor and gossip.


Anonymous said...

Besides the summertime baby and her two other kids, you forget that she has like an army of fluff an puff peoples with her at all times... so the size fits.

Anonymous said...

Jessica Simpson is, I am sure, a fine person. However, so was Emily Dickinson. I recommend her poetry to start your day. This website presents a poem a day. .She wrote over a thousand. It will keep you grounded when events of the day seem to careen around the bend. Where, oh where, have old hag, strapping hunk, ms. frivolity, lgb, high class lady decorator, and many others gone? Come home to Mama.

Anonymous said...

Aunt Mary: I'll come home and I will stop posting anonymously when average joe shuts his mouth and stops talking. He is driving me craaaaazzzy with his misinformed and misguided information.

Anonymous said...

I hear you anon 10:46. Posting anonymously is the best way to avoid being targeted for tounge lashings by blog crackpots.

Regarding the Urbans new home, good for them but I like the home Keith just sold better than this new one - more my style, however with a baby on the way, I imagine the Fort Knox-like security their new address affords had alot to do with the change.

Anonymous said...

Umm, make that 'tongue' lashings. That's what I get for posting before I'm fully awake.

Mama, I'm a relatively long time fan of your blog and haven't expressed my appreciation in awhile, so a BIG Thank You for sharing your unique insights and highly addictive writing style with us. The photos you provide are always terrific too.

Anonymous said...

Have to agree with 10:46 & 3:38, It's just easier to not be a target. Hopefully joe/ed/ will find like a blog of like minded individuals and leave mama's chilrun to frolic and speak of happier topics.

Anonymous said...

FYI...Anyone who has been to The Enclave in Nashville can understand that its a completely run of the mill, prefab looking pile of crap. No originality, nothing special. Just bland.

Anonymous said...

I have been in that house several times. It's like a 5 star boutique hotel. It's worth every penny.