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...from a woman we'll call Wendy Windbag that word on the Westchester County real estate gossip grapevine is that political power pair Bill and Hillary Clinton might soon have some property news to announce.
There have already been many rumors and multiple reports that Bill and Hill have been house hunting in Westchester County and some reports say they also peeped at a property just outside hippy-dippy and world famous Woodstock, NY in upstate New York.
We know nothing about the Demo duo shopping for a hideway in upstate New York, but according to Miss Windbag, the ex-President and current Secretary of State have made an offer on a new primary residence in Westchester County. Unfortunately, that's all the 411 Miss Windbag would reveal to Your Mama at this time but earlier reports indicate they want something bigger where they will be more comfortable entertaining.
When in Washington D.C., where Hill spends most of her time sans Bill, the former first couple shack up in a pretty brick Georgian number on Whitehaven Street NW and when in Chappaqua–that's in Westchester Country puppies, where Bill spends most of his time sans Hill, the Clintons own a 5 bedroom house on Old House Lane they scooped up in 1999 for $1,700,000.
Friday, July 3, 2009
Thursday, July 2, 2009
UPDATE: Michael Jackson
Hold on to your boots babies because the disturbingly pallid and suspendered tee-vee talking head that is Larry King will be taking viewers on a tour of Michael Jackson's Neverland Ranch. Tonight! Nine p.m. Eastern Standard. That's six pee-em for all the west coast children.
He will be joined by Jermaine Jackson and other "close friends." Pleeze jeezis let Lizzie Taylor be there along with the dee-voon Miss Ross, Uri Geller and that Dr. Tohme R. Tohme fellow who is, apparently, not actually a medical doctor of any kind but likes to be referred to as one anyway.
As we mentioned the other day, a little birdie snitched to Your Mama that this shadowy Tohme Tohme person, who was once described as Michael Jackson's manager, is in escrow to buy a big house on Bel Air's Stone Canyon Boulevard.
Now then...Your Mama thinks we've done flooded the damn car. Unless there is something real estate related that our little pea brain declares is vitally important or excessively inneresting, there will be no more discussing Michael Jackson, or as we liked to call him The White Lady. May he and all his wacky ways rest in peace.
He will be joined by Jermaine Jackson and other "close friends." Pleeze jeezis let Lizzie Taylor be there along with the dee-voon Miss Ross, Uri Geller and that Dr. Tohme R. Tohme fellow who is, apparently, not actually a medical doctor of any kind but likes to be referred to as one anyway.
As we mentioned the other day, a little birdie snitched to Your Mama that this shadowy Tohme Tohme person, who was once described as Michael Jackson's manager, is in escrow to buy a big house on Bel Air's Stone Canyon Boulevard.
Now then...Your Mama thinks we've done flooded the damn car. Unless there is something real estate related that our little pea brain declares is vitally important or excessively inneresting, there will be no more discussing Michael Jackson, or as we liked to call him The White Lady. May he and all his wacky ways rest in peace.
We apologize...
...for two reasons.
The first is that we were blocked from posting anything this morning for unknown reasons.
Secondly because it seems that the gossip "media" is all Bernie Madoff and Michael Jackson all the time this last week and while we are considering putting a cork in our big mouth about these two enigmatic men, we haven't yet. So bear with us while we work out our own unnatural and unhealthy fascinations with these two troubled and unsettling souls.
Once upon a time there was a man with the unfortunate name of J. Ezra Merkin. While Merkin may be a perfectly benign (even banal) sounding surname to many, in Your Mama's world a merkin is a wig for the hoo-hoo. That's right, a wig for the hoo-hoo. Most people probably never knew such a doohickey actually existed, but yes chickens, a merkin is indeed a wig for a woman's kitty and can be had for as little at forty bucks at the beauty supply.
But we digress. Although saddled with a name that has surely brought him a few moments of withering ridicule, our Mister Merkin prevailed over that particular patronymic misfortune and became a ferociously rich financier and high-livin' hedge fund manager. In fact, Mister Merkin became so rich that in 1995 he paid billionaire biznessman Ron Perelman eleven million smackers for an 18-room doo-plex at 740 Park Avenue, one of the most restrictive, immoderately expensive and intriguing apartment buildings in all of Manhattan.
Like many hedge hogs and fat cat plutocrats, after making vast sums of money, Mister and Missus Merkin went on to amass a large modern art collection which eventually came to include gorgeously slender Giacometti sculptures and an almost unbelievable 12 Rothkos, constituting what some have said is the largest collection of the painter's work held in private hands.
Then along came big bad Bernie Madoff. By most accounts Mister Merkin funneled a staggering $2.4 billion bucks into Bernie's fraudulent enterprise all of which evaporated in Bernie Madoff's sinister financial wake. Although it's not yet been proven that Mister Merkin knew anything about Bernie's elaborate misdeeds and Mister Merkin, naturally, denies any culpability or knowledge, he is none the less in the firing line of irate investors who claim he lied to them about who exactly was managing their money. In short, they say he told them he was managing the money when, they say, he was actually just handing the money over to Bernie's sinking ship. A civil suit was filed against Mister Merkin in early April of 2009 by New York State Attorney General Andrew Cuomo who, as part of the ongoing investigation and civil suit, is "forcing" Mister Merkin to sell off his assets with proceeds going to investors whose money was turned over to Bernie Madoff.
Recent reports reveal that Mister Merkin is in the process of selling his art collection, including some or all of those pretty Rothkos that hang around his lavish spread at 740 Park Avenue. The NY Post reports that the sale involves, "10 to 15 pieces, mostly paintings by Rothko" for which an as yet unidentified buyer is said to be forking over a spine tingling $310,000,000. Your Mama likes to imagine that the buyer is one of Mister Merkin's many bizness nemisi who will no doubt derive great pleasure from stripping Mister Merkin of the fruits and spoils of his labor.
However, as much as we like art and modern art in particular, it's Mister Merkin's ritzy real estate holdings that interest Your Mama the most. The NY Post recently reported that in addition to liquidating his artworks, Mister and Missus Merkin are "laying the groundwork" for selling their dee-luxe doo-plex digs at 740 Park Avenue. Of course, upon reading that Your Mama and every other floor plan slut began to sweat with anticipation waiting for the listing to hit the pipeline.
Some reports say the 6th and 7th floor doo-lex could fetch as much at $50,000,000 but that seems rather optimistic to Your Mama given that the most recent sales at 740 Park Avenue include Vera Wang's $23,100,000 purchase of her parents' pad in 2007 and the $27,500,000 sale of Edith Haupt's 2 bedroom doo-plex on the 17th and 18th floors in 2006 to much maligned financier John Thain.
There is currently only one apartment at 740 on the open market and that is a 15-room, spread owned by oil heiress June Speight and her stockbroker huzband Randolph listed at $26,000,000. The 6,700 square foot doo-plex on the 4th and 5th floors has been on the open market for nearly a year and has already had $9,000,000 is price chops. Peter Huang's 4th and 5th floor doo-plex (right next door to the Speights) was listed in July of 2008 for a blistering $38,000,000 but after 5 months it was de-listed amid rumors that it was in contract (it was not according to author Michael Gross who hawk watches and reports on all things 740 Park Avenue). As was widely reported in the New York papers, Courtney Sale Ross' double-dooplex on the 12th and 13th floors (E. 71st Street entrance) may or may not be available for around $60,000,000...or $75,000,000 depending on who you ask.
At any rate, it seems crystal clear that Mister and Missus Merkin will be compelled to sell their 740 Park doo-plex along with whatever other hoity-toity assets Andy Cuomo says must be sold. What remains to be seen is when, for how much, and who will buy such a monstrous crib with a reported $15,000+ per month maintenance at a time when there are fewer and fewer buyers for such massive and massively priced apartments. We shall see children, we shall see. In the meantime be sure to ring Your Mama and let her know if you hear any dish on the doo-plex.
Records show that Mister and Missus Merkin also own a property in near Aspen, CO and a waterfront house on Bay Boulevard in Atlantic Beach that is surprisingly modest for a couple who shack up in one of the most expensive and exclusive buildings in Manhattan.
In other real estate related Madoff news...yesterday Bernie's wife Ruth was officially booted from her East 63rd Street penthouse perch. The U.S. Marshall notified Ruthie of the seizure and she was expected to be "leaving the residence and surrendering all personal property." Your Mama is no attorney so if any of you legal eagles know, what constitutes personal property? Could she take her expensive clothes? Her handbags? Jewelry? Shoes? Anything?
She still has $2.5 million that federal prosecutors have allowed her to keep but that is not protected from any civil suits that might be filed against her. The couple's other properties–in Palm Beach, Montauk and the South of France–were already seized leaving Ruthie with no where to go unless one of her sons or remaining friends takes her in.
The first is that we were blocked from posting anything this morning for unknown reasons.
Secondly because it seems that the gossip "media" is all Bernie Madoff and Michael Jackson all the time this last week and while we are considering putting a cork in our big mouth about these two enigmatic men, we haven't yet. So bear with us while we work out our own unnatural and unhealthy fascinations with these two troubled and unsettling souls.
Once upon a time there was a man with the unfortunate name of J. Ezra Merkin. While Merkin may be a perfectly benign (even banal) sounding surname to many, in Your Mama's world a merkin is a wig for the hoo-hoo. That's right, a wig for the hoo-hoo. Most people probably never knew such a doohickey actually existed, but yes chickens, a merkin is indeed a wig for a woman's kitty and can be had for as little at forty bucks at the beauty supply.
But we digress. Although saddled with a name that has surely brought him a few moments of withering ridicule, our Mister Merkin prevailed over that particular patronymic misfortune and became a ferociously rich financier and high-livin' hedge fund manager. In fact, Mister Merkin became so rich that in 1995 he paid billionaire biznessman Ron Perelman eleven million smackers for an 18-room doo-plex at 740 Park Avenue, one of the most restrictive, immoderately expensive and intriguing apartment buildings in all of Manhattan.
Like many hedge hogs and fat cat plutocrats, after making vast sums of money, Mister and Missus Merkin went on to amass a large modern art collection which eventually came to include gorgeously slender Giacometti sculptures and an almost unbelievable 12 Rothkos, constituting what some have said is the largest collection of the painter's work held in private hands.
Then along came big bad Bernie Madoff. By most accounts Mister Merkin funneled a staggering $2.4 billion bucks into Bernie's fraudulent enterprise all of which evaporated in Bernie Madoff's sinister financial wake. Although it's not yet been proven that Mister Merkin knew anything about Bernie's elaborate misdeeds and Mister Merkin, naturally, denies any culpability or knowledge, he is none the less in the firing line of irate investors who claim he lied to them about who exactly was managing their money. In short, they say he told them he was managing the money when, they say, he was actually just handing the money over to Bernie's sinking ship. A civil suit was filed against Mister Merkin in early April of 2009 by New York State Attorney General Andrew Cuomo who, as part of the ongoing investigation and civil suit, is "forcing" Mister Merkin to sell off his assets with proceeds going to investors whose money was turned over to Bernie Madoff.
Recent reports reveal that Mister Merkin is in the process of selling his art collection, including some or all of those pretty Rothkos that hang around his lavish spread at 740 Park Avenue. The NY Post reports that the sale involves, "10 to 15 pieces, mostly paintings by Rothko" for which an as yet unidentified buyer is said to be forking over a spine tingling $310,000,000. Your Mama likes to imagine that the buyer is one of Mister Merkin's many bizness nemisi who will no doubt derive great pleasure from stripping Mister Merkin of the fruits and spoils of his labor.
However, as much as we like art and modern art in particular, it's Mister Merkin's ritzy real estate holdings that interest Your Mama the most. The NY Post recently reported that in addition to liquidating his artworks, Mister and Missus Merkin are "laying the groundwork" for selling their dee-luxe doo-plex digs at 740 Park Avenue. Of course, upon reading that Your Mama and every other floor plan slut began to sweat with anticipation waiting for the listing to hit the pipeline.
Some reports say the 6th and 7th floor doo-lex could fetch as much at $50,000,000 but that seems rather optimistic to Your Mama given that the most recent sales at 740 Park Avenue include Vera Wang's $23,100,000 purchase of her parents' pad in 2007 and the $27,500,000 sale of Edith Haupt's 2 bedroom doo-plex on the 17th and 18th floors in 2006 to much maligned financier John Thain.
There is currently only one apartment at 740 on the open market and that is a 15-room, spread owned by oil heiress June Speight and her stockbroker huzband Randolph listed at $26,000,000. The 6,700 square foot doo-plex on the 4th and 5th floors has been on the open market for nearly a year and has already had $9,000,000 is price chops. Peter Huang's 4th and 5th floor doo-plex (right next door to the Speights) was listed in July of 2008 for a blistering $38,000,000 but after 5 months it was de-listed amid rumors that it was in contract (it was not according to author Michael Gross who hawk watches and reports on all things 740 Park Avenue). As was widely reported in the New York papers, Courtney Sale Ross' double-dooplex on the 12th and 13th floors (E. 71st Street entrance) may or may not be available for around $60,000,000...or $75,000,000 depending on who you ask.
At any rate, it seems crystal clear that Mister and Missus Merkin will be compelled to sell their 740 Park doo-plex along with whatever other hoity-toity assets Andy Cuomo says must be sold. What remains to be seen is when, for how much, and who will buy such a monstrous crib with a reported $15,000+ per month maintenance at a time when there are fewer and fewer buyers for such massive and massively priced apartments. We shall see children, we shall see. In the meantime be sure to ring Your Mama and let her know if you hear any dish on the doo-plex.
Records show that Mister and Missus Merkin also own a property in near Aspen, CO and a waterfront house on Bay Boulevard in Atlantic Beach that is surprisingly modest for a couple who shack up in one of the most expensive and exclusive buildings in Manhattan.
In other real estate related Madoff news...yesterday Bernie's wife Ruth was officially booted from her East 63rd Street penthouse perch. The U.S. Marshall notified Ruthie of the seizure and she was expected to be "leaving the residence and surrendering all personal property." Your Mama is no attorney so if any of you legal eagles know, what constitutes personal property? Could she take her expensive clothes? Her handbags? Jewelry? Shoes? Anything?
She still has $2.5 million that federal prosecutors have allowed her to keep but that is not protected from any civil suits that might be filed against her. The couple's other properties–in Palm Beach, Montauk and the South of France–were already seized leaving Ruthie with no where to go unless one of her sons or remaining friends takes her in.
Wednesday, July 1, 2009
UPDATE: Michael Jackson
Lard have mercy Your Mama is ready for all this Michael Jackson madness to come to a swift conclusion. However, in the interest of seeing something through to the bitter end (and, if we may be honest, keeping up with the Jones') we got a bit more 411 on what is to become of the Holmby Hills Estate where Mister Jackson met his untimely if not entirely surprising end.According to the peeps at gossip juggernaut TMZ, who seem to have a direct line to all things Michael Jackson, the 3-story, 7 bedroom and 13 terlit mansion on N. Carolwood Drive is to be leased to fashion dee-ziner Christian Audigier.
Perhaps not coincidentally, the estate is currently owned by clothing manufacturer Hubert Guez who is, ta-da!, the CEO of Ed Hardy, one of the several flashy brands created by Mister Audigier. Apparently Mister Audigier is going to move his offices into the building. Your Mama hopes the property is zoned for business.
No word on what Mister Audigier will be paying (and frankly we do not care a lick), but it has been widely reported that Mister Jackson was paying a breath taking $100,000 per month. Maybe he expired after getting the rent bill.
UPDATE: Michael Jackson
The ever intrepid peeps at TMZ have got a hold of what is believed to be 49 snaps of recently deceased Michael Jackson's once beloved and later neglected Neverland Ranch as it exists today. Mister Jackson fled the Los Olivos, CA property in the aftermath of salacious child molestation allegations and an even more lurid jury trial in 2005. Although he was acquitted of the charges, Mister Jackson vowed never to live on the property again.None the less, it is widely rumored and frequently reported that a public memorial and viewing of Mister Jackson's dead body will take place at the ranch this Friday, a situation sure to turn into a damn circus and which will likely attract all manner of looky-loos, fans, fanatics and bizarrely obsessed kooks who rank Mister Jackson right up there with Jesus.
However, there are also reports and rumors swirling that talk of a public memorial (and viewing) at Neverland Ranch are just that, talk. Some recent reports indicate that the Jackson family has not yet decided on how or where to memorialize the man-child and bury the body. Whoever it is that gets to decide these things better get it together quick though because, as sure as we have toenails, there are probably already too many people hopping in their hoopdies and heading towards their own damn fool notion of the promised land.*
Anyhoo, the buildings at Neverland Ranch all appear to have been cleared of the kiddie crap that Jackson was known to collect and the grounds cleaned up and spruced up by the folks at Colony Capital who swooped in at the last minute to save the financially beleaguered Mister Jackson from foreclosure.
It's unknown what plans Colony might have for the 2,600 acre property. It would make sense to Your Mama's pea brain they would want to sell it for a profit (that is the bizness they are in after all) but given that ownership of the property has been reported to be a joint venture between Colony and Mister Jackson (now his estate), there could be a bit of a tug of war depending on who wants to do what with the property. Regardless of what happens to the property it will be, for better or worse, associated with Mister Jackson and is lavishly weird lifestyle.
There are, of course, all sorts of unseemly rumors and reports sliding down the gossip grapevine about Neverland Ranch becoming Michael Jackson's Graceland or it being where Jackson will lie in state (ew!). We'll just have to wait and see. In death as in life for Mister Jackson, Your Mama would bet everything we have a whole slew of people are going to try really hard to make boo-coo bucks from the endeavor.
The country-style mock Tudor mansion is said to measure around 13,000 square feet and features lots large rooms with beamed ceilings, wood-paned windows, brick walls and wood floors. The children will note that the notorious cedar lined "secret room" is included in the cache of photographs and also that it appears Mister Jackson had a party-sized spa tub in his window wrapped master bathroom.
There are also pictures of the games house adjacent to the tennis court, the swimming pool, the empty elephant cages, the giraffe house, monkey cages, Bubbles' cage, the forlorn looking carnival grounds, the refurbished railway station, the movies house and on and on...
*A decision has been made by the Jackson family that there will be no public viewing at Neverland Ranch so all you people making a mad dash for the Santa Ynez Valley can turn your automobiles around and go home. A public memorial (not, thank heavens, a viewing) is being arranged.
photo: Pacific Coast News
Casino King Steve Wynn Lists Fifth Avenue Spread
SELLER: Steve and Elaine WynnLOCATION: Fifth Avenue, New York, NY
PRICE: $25,000,000
SIZE: 3,500 square feet (approx.), 2 bedrooms, 3.5 bathrooms
DESCRIPTION: ...It is literally 3500+/- sq ft of immaculate renovation designed for ultimate comfort. Originally built in 1925 as a 13 room, 4 bedroom plus library apartment, it has recently been transformed into one of the most glamorous homes on Fifth Avenue with a master suite and bath created from 3 bedrooms...The original living room, formal dining room and library were combined into a living space which wows you as you enter this full floor apartment. There is a new formal dining room, a large guest bedroom with bath, an exquisite powder room an an electronics system second to none...
YOUR MAMAS NOTES: A few days ago, The New York Observer's real estate gossip boy wonder Max Abelson let the cat out of the bag about Las Vegas-based casino king Steve Wynn and his soon to be ex-wife Elaine listing their full floor Fifth Avenue pied a terre with an impressive asking price of $25,000,000. At the time, no listing was available online but one has since surfaced and Your Mama thought the children might like a look-see because hunnies it is a doozy.
Among other gambling facilities, the legally blind billionaire built and owned the Mirage and the art-filled Bellagio before selling it off to entertainment juggernaut MGM. Mister Wynn currently owns two hyperactively dee-luxe casino hotels on The Strip in Las Vegas, the eponymous Wynn Las Vegas and the newly opened Encore Las Vegas which reportedly cost an mind-altering $2.3 billion to build and is where he currently displays the 231-carat Wynn Diamond. I case y'all didn't know the Wynn Diamond is a "prune sized" and pear shaped bauble set by Cartier about which Missus Wynn once said, "It's the biggest ol’ diamond that we know about and that we can get our hands on that is not in some institution." She more recently told the LA Times, '"Nobody would pay any attention to the person wearing that stone," she says. "It's almost like a blinking light. It's meant to be a thing of nature."' Although it's probably vulgar to even think about owning such a brazenly ostentateous piece of jewelry, Your Mama is starting to like this Elaine ladee and her down home spin on her little sparkler. Wonder who's getting that in the dee-vorce.
Anyhoo, all records and reports indicate Mister Wynn and the soon to be ex-Missus Wynn scooped up their seventh floor spread in 2001 for about $7,000,000. Listing information indicates the unit measures 3,500+/- square feet while Mister Abelson's report states it's 3,900 square feet. Let's assume it's somewher in between. In 2004, according to multiple reports, a water pipe in ceiling busted, the apartment flooded and like all good Americans with money to burn the Wynns later sued the building, their neighbors and a number of inspectors and construction people over the matter.
We don't know (or care) how the legal brouhaha turned out but we do know that the Wynn crib was subjected to a radical reconfiguration in the subsequent renovation that transformed the 13-room and four bedroom Pre-War dowager into a sterile, oddly configured high roller hotel-suite sort of place with just 6 rooms including 2 bedrooms and 3.5 bathrooms.
According to the listing agent who spoke openly with Mister Abelson in that somewhat bloated, effusive and funny manner unique to real estate agents, the elevator opens to a private vestibule with "very discreet leather" lined walls which is nice because we'd really hate to have leather walls that screamed for attention. The front door opens directly into the commodious main living and entertaining space inexplicably and unfortunately fashioned out of what was once the living room, library and dining room. There are three large windows that are just high enough to peer over the treetops and into Central Park.
Tucked back into the corner of what was once the dining room is, as Mister Abelson rather humorously called it, an "eat-in media center" where a substantially sized section sofa sits opposite a large built in flat screen tee-vee. According to the listing agent, this room '"has no table, but what would you call those things that sit in front of a couch? A little lower than a table? You can eat there; you can watch TV."' That would be a tee-vee tray Mister real estate agent. 'Nuff said.
A powder pooper and itty bitty coat closet barely big enough for even one of those bulky full length sable coat things rich ladees in New York like so much is tucked around the corner and down the hall from the living room. The corridor leads to the well equipped but deeply unispired kitchen and the oddly located beige and mauve colored dining room which appears to have been carved out of what Your Mama imagines was once the staff suite. A concealed door in the dining room open into a large laundry and utility room. It's nice the door is concealed and it's wonderful to have an actual laundry room in a New York City apartment so that Svetlana would not have to have hissy fits about dragging the dirty clothes to a laundromat, but we can't get over the complete lack of sense it makes to tuck a dining room way back in the back of the apartment. Although not much better, it might make more sense to move the dining room back up into its original location and make that dining room into a "media center." This fix, however, does not take into account the bizarre combination of three bedrooms into one giant and ill-configured master suite.
Floor plan information provided with the listing indicates that the master bedroom is the one located at the front of the apartment facing Fifth Avenue and Central Park. This certainly makes sense given that this is the bedroom that offer direct access into the his and her bedroom sized bathrooms where, we regret to inform, the closets are also located. However, the listing photo of that bedroom appears to be outfitted with only a twin sized bed. We'll leave the children to speculate about that. The rear bedroom includes three closets, a small pooper and a bed that will comfortably fit more than one person.
It remains to be seen if the wildly rich Wynns can get anywhere near twenty-five million clams particularly given that the last apartment in the building to sell, according to StreetEasy, was a full floor number on the sixth floor that sold in April of 2005 for $8,600,000. Records reveal that 3,450 square foot residence was sold by still sexy actor Richard Gere and purchased by Edmond and Marielle Safra. Mister Safra is, of course the nephew of deceased financier Edmond J. Safra and his formidable widow Lily who–all the children surely recall–owns the legendary Villa Leopolda.
Previous reports reveal that in July of 2005 Mister and Missus Wynn sold their 12,162 square foot manse located on 4.6 acres smack in the center of the unnaturally verdant Shadow Creek Golf Course for around $15,500,000 and decamped for a private villa at the Wynn Las Vegas. Now that the Wynns have gone splitsville and are are likely headed for one of the most expensive dee-vorces ever, it's unclear where each of them is living. However, there are six private villas at the Wynn Las Vegas not available to the public and recent reports indicate one is undergoing a renovation and it is whispered among people who care about these things that it is being prepared for Mister Wynn and his new and younger ladee-friend who has been identified as a late forties British born dee-vorcee named Andrea Hissom.
In addition to whatever other real estate he may own and like all good moguls, Mister Wynn also owns a boat called Allegro that measures in at a whopping 183-feet long.
Monday, June 29, 2009
A Bit of Mish Mash for Tuesday
Your Mama has a little mish-mashing to do this morning.
1.
The first item we would like to discuss is the comely casa on N. Catalina Street in Los Angeles' Los Feliz neighborhood that everyone besides Your Mama has been reporting is owned and being offered for sale at $3,697,000 by the exceedingly well paid prostie luvvin' sitcom star Charlie Sheen (Two and a Half Men) and his third legal ladee-mate Brooke Mueller.
According to the listing agents in a recent report in the increasingly anemic Hot Property column in the L.A. Times, after forking over $2,575,000 for the 4,179 square foot crib in November of 2007 and spending a year and boo-coo bucks rehabbing the residence, Mister Sheen and Missus Third Sheen have decided to sell the property (pictured above) because they desire bigger digs in which to raise their expanding family.
Now listen chickens, Your Mama does not know nuthin' from a dung beetle but according to three–that's right, three–of our better connected informants this is not entirely accurate because while Mister Sheen and Missus Third Sheen do own the property in question, they do not nor have they ever officially occupied the house in Los Feliz.
Each of the sources we questioned whispered in Your Mama's big ear that Mister Sheen and Missus Third Sheen live in a 7,924 square foot manse in the guard gated Mulholland Estates community in the hills above Sherman Oaks. Records show that Mister Sheen paid $7,200,000 for the 5 bedroom and 7 pooper property in April of 2006 during the bloody dee-vorce from his second ex-wife Denise Richards.
For what it's worth, Mulholland Estates is the same gated community that perplexedly successful Paris Hilton lives as well as tee-vee ack-tress Judith Light, British pop star Robby Williams (who has reportedly decamped back to the U.K.), boob-toob bench sitter Judge Greg Mathis, cheese ball crooner Tom Jones, letter turner Vanna White and a few others we won't bother to bother with today.
2.
Not that many if any of the children have anything that even resembles sympathy for them, but it's not been a good couple of weeks for Bernie and Ruth Madoff. Yesterday, to a cacophony of cheers and tears, the justifiably vilified Ponzi putz was sentenced to a stunning 150 years in the pokey for his grisly financial shenanigans that left thousands destitute. Last week, his bird-like wife Ruth was ordered to vacate the couple's posh apartment on Manhattan's Upper East Side of which the NY Daily News somehow has interior photos*. Of note, according to the article, are the $35,000 carpet and the $20,000 tea table.
*Reader beware: The fine folks at CityFile have heard the photos were included in a coffee table book about Manhattan interior dee-zine style and are 20 years old. So really kids, who knows if this is the expensive frippery Miz Madoff is currently living with and soon to be giving up.
In addition to their nifty New York apartment–located in the same building where the Today Show's Matt Lauer paid $5,882,353 for a sixth floor crib in 2004 and expected to be sold for somewhere around seven or eight million clams–the gubbamint also seized the couple's water front property in Palm Beach, a beach house in Montauk, NY and a modest but expensive condo in the super swish South of France. All properties are expected to be liquidated and sold off with any proceeds going to the many victims of Madoff's Machiavellian scheme.
According to the floor plan that made its way around the interweb (and which we are not at all convinced is the actual plan of the Madoff penthouse), the East 64th Street apartment includes a private elevator landing that opens to a small foyer. At the front of the apartment is a living room with a fireplace, a corner library and dining room. A large butler's pantry separates the dining room from the small kitchen which in turn leads to 3 sinfully small staff rooms that all share just one terlit. The master bedroom includes a large dressing room and small bathroom. Each of the other three bedrooms also features a private pooper.
A new and salacious report in the always entertaining NY Post reveals that poor Ruthie, once a pampered woman who is now reduced to riding the subway like a common person, is having a wee of trouble finding new rented digs. Maybe one of her sons will make room for her in one of their pricey properties in New York or Greenwich, CT.
3.
Since everyone else is talking about the recently deceased King of Pop Michael Jackson, we figured we might as well too. Thanks to the ever intrepid Legal Eagle, Your Mama was directed to an article in the Daily News which recently reported that Mister Jackson had been planning to relocate to a England this week where he was scheduled to reside in a Chislehurst, Kent estate called Foxbury Manor during his much anticipated 50-show run at London's O2 Arena.
Foxbury Manor was built in 1875, stands three stories tall and measures either 22,000 or 26,000 square feet depending on which report one reads. Although the house originally had as many as 32 bedrooms, the current owners reduced the count in a recent renovation to just 11 behemoth bedroom suites including an 1,800 square foot master suite. The recently rehabbed estate is reported to have password-controlled entrances and state of the art security systems–natch–and, while hardly the circus that Neverland Ranch was, recreational facilities are reported to include a private lake, a music room, an underground cinema and an indoor swimming pool.
The rumored to have been impoverished Mister Jackson reportedly paid a whopping £1,000,000 to lease the Grade II listed mansion until February of 2010. But alas...
Of course, anyone with a damn television knows that Mister Jackson and his three children–who may or may not be his biological children according to scandalous report–were last living in a leased mansion on N. Carolwood Drive in the Holmby Hills area of Los Angeles for which he was reportedly paying $100,000 per month.
The fate of Mister Jackson's once beloved Neverland Ranch remains up in the air, but the family is reportedly planning a public viewing of Mister Jackson's dead body this Friday at the ranch even though he was adamant that he would never live on the property again because it had been tainted by the allegations of child molestation. Lard have mercy chickens. Your Mama can't think of anything creepier and less dignified than the spectacle that will surely come down during a public viewing of Michael Jackson's dead body at Neverland Ranch. All those Screaming Mimis coming from miles around clamoring to get a damn photo of his dead body? Come on. This don't have nuthin' to do with the real estate and certainly this ain't none of Your Mama's bizness, but does that wackadoodle Jackson family really think this is a good idea? Pleeze.
4.
In other Michael Jackson related real estate rumor and gossip...
Your Mama hears from a someone we'll call Wanda Wannachat that Mister Jackson's (former) manager a–mysterious man named Dr. Tohme R. Tohme who is neither a doctor of any kind or an "Abassador at Large" to the country Senegal as his website proclaims–is in contract to buy a $5,800,000 mansion in Bel Air. However, now that faux doctor's golden goose is no more all the real estate peeps involved are on pins and needles wondering if the deal is going to stick together. Just rumor and gossip children, rumor and gossip.
1.
The first item we would like to discuss is the comely casa on N. Catalina Street in Los Angeles' Los Feliz neighborhood that everyone besides Your Mama has been reporting is owned and being offered for sale at $3,697,000 by the exceedingly well paid prostie luvvin' sitcom star Charlie Sheen (Two and a Half Men) and his third legal ladee-mate Brooke Mueller.
According to the listing agents in a recent report in the increasingly anemic Hot Property column in the L.A. Times, after forking over $2,575,000 for the 4,179 square foot crib in November of 2007 and spending a year and boo-coo bucks rehabbing the residence, Mister Sheen and Missus Third Sheen have decided to sell the property (pictured above) because they desire bigger digs in which to raise their expanding family.Now listen chickens, Your Mama does not know nuthin' from a dung beetle but according to three–that's right, three–of our better connected informants this is not entirely accurate because while Mister Sheen and Missus Third Sheen do own the property in question, they do not nor have they ever officially occupied the house in Los Feliz.
Each of the sources we questioned whispered in Your Mama's big ear that Mister Sheen and Missus Third Sheen live in a 7,924 square foot manse in the guard gated Mulholland Estates community in the hills above Sherman Oaks. Records show that Mister Sheen paid $7,200,000 for the 5 bedroom and 7 pooper property in April of 2006 during the bloody dee-vorce from his second ex-wife Denise Richards.
For what it's worth, Mulholland Estates is the same gated community that perplexedly successful Paris Hilton lives as well as tee-vee ack-tress Judith Light, British pop star Robby Williams (who has reportedly decamped back to the U.K.), boob-toob bench sitter Judge Greg Mathis, cheese ball crooner Tom Jones, letter turner Vanna White and a few others we won't bother to bother with today.
2.
Not that many if any of the children have anything that even resembles sympathy for them, but it's not been a good couple of weeks for Bernie and Ruth Madoff. Yesterday, to a cacophony of cheers and tears, the justifiably vilified Ponzi putz was sentenced to a stunning 150 years in the pokey for his grisly financial shenanigans that left thousands destitute. Last week, his bird-like wife Ruth was ordered to vacate the couple's posh apartment on Manhattan's Upper East Side of which the NY Daily News somehow has interior photos*. Of note, according to the article, are the $35,000 carpet and the $20,000 tea table.
*Reader beware: The fine folks at CityFile have heard the photos were included in a coffee table book about Manhattan interior dee-zine style and are 20 years old. So really kids, who knows if this is the expensive frippery Miz Madoff is currently living with and soon to be giving up.
In addition to their nifty New York apartment–located in the same building where the Today Show's Matt Lauer paid $5,882,353 for a sixth floor crib in 2004 and expected to be sold for somewhere around seven or eight million clams–the gubbamint also seized the couple's water front property in Palm Beach, a beach house in Montauk, NY and a modest but expensive condo in the super swish South of France. All properties are expected to be liquidated and sold off with any proceeds going to the many victims of Madoff's Machiavellian scheme.
According to the floor plan that made its way around the interweb (and which we are not at all convinced is the actual plan of the Madoff penthouse), the East 64th Street apartment includes a private elevator landing that opens to a small foyer. At the front of the apartment is a living room with a fireplace, a corner library and dining room. A large butler's pantry separates the dining room from the small kitchen which in turn leads to 3 sinfully small staff rooms that all share just one terlit. The master bedroom includes a large dressing room and small bathroom. Each of the other three bedrooms also features a private pooper.
A new and salacious report in the always entertaining NY Post reveals that poor Ruthie, once a pampered woman who is now reduced to riding the subway like a common person, is having a wee of trouble finding new rented digs. Maybe one of her sons will make room for her in one of their pricey properties in New York or Greenwich, CT.
3.
Since everyone else is talking about the recently deceased King of Pop Michael Jackson, we figured we might as well too. Thanks to the ever intrepid Legal Eagle, Your Mama was directed to an article in the Daily News which recently reported that Mister Jackson had been planning to relocate to a England this week where he was scheduled to reside in a Chislehurst, Kent estate called Foxbury Manor during his much anticipated 50-show run at London's O2 Arena.
Foxbury Manor was built in 1875, stands three stories tall and measures either 22,000 or 26,000 square feet depending on which report one reads. Although the house originally had as many as 32 bedrooms, the current owners reduced the count in a recent renovation to just 11 behemoth bedroom suites including an 1,800 square foot master suite. The recently rehabbed estate is reported to have password-controlled entrances and state of the art security systems–natch–and, while hardly the circus that Neverland Ranch was, recreational facilities are reported to include a private lake, a music room, an underground cinema and an indoor swimming pool.
The rumored to have been impoverished Mister Jackson reportedly paid a whopping £1,000,000 to lease the Grade II listed mansion until February of 2010. But alas...
Of course, anyone with a damn television knows that Mister Jackson and his three children–who may or may not be his biological children according to scandalous report–were last living in a leased mansion on N. Carolwood Drive in the Holmby Hills area of Los Angeles for which he was reportedly paying $100,000 per month.
The fate of Mister Jackson's once beloved Neverland Ranch remains up in the air, but the family is reportedly planning a public viewing of Mister Jackson's dead body this Friday at the ranch even though he was adamant that he would never live on the property again because it had been tainted by the allegations of child molestation. Lard have mercy chickens. Your Mama can't think of anything creepier and less dignified than the spectacle that will surely come down during a public viewing of Michael Jackson's dead body at Neverland Ranch. All those Screaming Mimis coming from miles around clamoring to get a damn photo of his dead body? Come on. This don't have nuthin' to do with the real estate and certainly this ain't none of Your Mama's bizness, but does that wackadoodle Jackson family really think this is a good idea? Pleeze.
4.
In other Michael Jackson related real estate rumor and gossip...
Your Mama hears from a someone we'll call Wanda Wannachat that Mister Jackson's (former) manager a–mysterious man named Dr. Tohme R. Tohme who is neither a doctor of any kind or an "Abassador at Large" to the country Senegal as his website proclaims–is in contract to buy a $5,800,000 mansion in Bel Air. However, now that faux doctor's golden goose is no more all the real estate peeps involved are on pins and needles wondering if the deal is going to stick together. Just rumor and gossip children, rumor and gossip.
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