Wednesday, December 3, 2008

Anyone Want to Sleep in Pauly Shore's Bed?

OWNER: Pauly Shore
LOCATION: Solar Drive, Los Angeles, CA
PRICE: $15,500/month
SIZE: 3,0124 square feet, 3 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms
DESCRIPTION: Quality Occupants sought for 4bd/2ba Hills home on private/gated drive w/ ample parking.Promontory setting with stunning downtown to ocean views. Updated throughout w/ Limestone & Hardwood floors, Tiled Baths, Wired for Sound, Kitchen has Granite Tops, Stainless Steel appliances and Bamboo Island. Separate Master suite complete w/ Large Walk-in. Available Furnished or Unfurnished. Common areas allow the outdoors to be brought in as collapsible doors invite gentle breezes & fresh air views!

YOUR MAMAS NOTES: Listen puppies, sometimes celebrity real estate pickins are slim and today is one of those days. So bear with us while we debase and defile our already not very dignified self and briefly discuss the Hollywood Hills house being offered for lease at $15,500 per month by much maligned and not particularly funny comedian Pauly Shore (Encino Man, Bio-Dome, Minding the Store).

Although Mister Shore may be a colossal show bizness jackass who goes around calling himself "The Weasel" and making spectacularly unfunny movies in which he fakes his own death (Pauly Shore Is Dead) in hopes of reviving his dead, dead, DEAD! career, he still gets to sit in comedy's royal box due to the fact that his mother is comedy queen Mitzi Shore who owns The Comedy Store on the Sunset Strip where legendary comics like Roseanne Barr (or whatever she calls herself nowadays), John Belushi, Andy Kaufman, Sam Kinison, Richard Pryor and many other funny folks worked their actually funny stuff.

Mister Shore has long lived high in the Hollywood Hills on not easily accessed Solar Drive in a low slung modern house which property records show he purchased in May of 1996 for $1,150,000. The gated property, accessed by private drive, occupies a promontory with spine tingling 270 degree views of Runyan and Nichols Canyons, the (not very inspiring) downtown skyline and the glittery lights of Tinseltown below. Records and listing information indicate the updated house measures 3,024 square feet and includes 3 bedrooms and 2 bathrooms (the listing description says 4 bedrooms).

Listing information indicates the house has been wired for sound (nice) and features both wood and limestone floors, tiled baths, granite counters and stainless steel appliances in the kitchen (natch), and floor to ceiling collapsible doors that open the house up to the massive concrete patio surrounding the newly built infinity edged swimming pool and spa. Listing information also indicates the house can be leased furnished or unfurnished. But let's be honest children, who wants to spend $15,500 per month to rent a house with a dining room furnished like the damn breakfast room of a Best Western motel on Interstate 80 and bedroom furniture that looks like it might have been purchased at Ikea? Pleeze.

Mister Shore's nearby neighbors include oil scion and adulterous actor Balthazar Getty (Brothers and Sisters) and Australian actress Sarah Wynter (24, Windfall) whose house is also available for lease at $7,800 per month. Next door to Mister Shore is horror film director Wes Craven (Scream 1-4, A Nightmare on Elm Street) who sued Mister Shore earlier this year claiming construction of Mister Shore's swimming pool compromised the directors property and caused slope failure. As is customary in the U-nited States, Mister Shore filed a counter suit claiming Mister Craven did not maintain the slope properly which caused (or contributed) to the slide. The un-neighborly neighbors have reportedly reached a tentative agreement settling the case before it went to trial.

25 comments:

Babe Parish said...

"adulterous actor Balthazar Getty"

love it and the fact that NO ONE HAS COMMENTED in the two hours since this was posted. Pauly's
Mama Meter is loooooow. heehee.

i like the crazy pool.

Anonymous said...

That could be one of the sexiest pools i've ever seen.

Anonymous said...

Shitty house. It was on MTV Cribs a couple of years ago, I wonder why he moved out...

Anonymous said...

I hope you mean it is slim pickins today due to this being a lease and not a home for sale, because I think this house is one of the cooler homes you have written about lately. Yeh, you can knock the decor if you want, but I would give anything to own this piece of property.

Trudy Styler said...

Uh, slim pickins because it's Pauly Shore.

Anonymous said...

Where is the continental breakfast? And where can I get a copy of USA Today? After all, isn't that what the dayroom with the two tables is for at most Comfort Inns? Is that a treadmill I see next to one of the tables? So it's the fitness center, too. Oh my.

I think the bedroom furniture really is IKEA stuff.

LOVE the pool, however.

Anonymous said...

The decore is demode. The infinity pool is lovely, but the idea of sleeping in Pauly Shore's bed makes this vacation rental a nonstarter.

Anonymous said...

"decor"

Damn, me.

Anonymous said...

I'm sure he probably doesn't want to live next door to Wes Craven given the lawsuit. Should just sell the house, but I'm sure he thinks he's being smart renting it until the market turns around.

Anonymous said...

paulie's a sweetie

Anonymous said...

I'm no engineer, but I can believe that constructing that pool wasn't easy. Wonder how it will fare the next time the San Andreas farts?

Poor Pauly hasn't done anything great in a while, but Son-In-Law is a hilarious movie, probably due to the excellent supporting cast.

Mama's Kiwi Kid said...

"with a dining room furnished like the damn breakfast room of a Best Western motel on Interstate 80" Mama is at her best again.

Goodbye hideous furniture.

Hello gorgeous swimming pool.

Hippie Canyon said...

I half expected to see Gary Busey standing in that F-up dining room. It looks like it belongs in a state-owned rehab center... in Reseda. Not that I would know, I'm just saying. And that said, I must say that the view is wonderful as is the infinity pool. But the house? It would make for a nice location shoot as is. I'm thinking something like a black & white fashon spread for Angeleno magazine. A sort of short story photo essay on rehab. Non?

Anonymous said...

LOL an infinity pool, accordion doors and....IKEA furniture in the bedroom? Guess he ran out of money. The rest of the decor seems like it was bought at a Palm Springs yardsale, but if someone came in and just did a nice redecorate, this would be a pretty nice piece of property. I'd talk it down, because of picky neighbors, though.

Anonymous said...

LOVE that tv from 1990. I hope it's included in the lease, otherwise I would refuse to move in.

Anonymous said...

I know hillsides often look unstable in LA, but given the landslide history that is, according to the linked article, "still ongoing" I am not sure he could sell it if he wanted to. The land all around it looks precarious. Maybe a few retaining walls might help it sell?

lil' gay boy said...

"Anyone Want to Sleep in Pauly Shore's Bed?"

Ew.

I'm hoping the $15,500/month lease includes regular fumigating. If you rotate through the aerial, you can catch a view of the house pre-remodel, with a rather odd-shaped pool. Overall a nice remodel for a mid-century on a precarious site, and the new pool is indeed spectacular.

But that state rehab housing decor? Um, not so much; but perhaps, given his penchant for unpleasant confrontation, shrewd. I would not be surprised if the poor schlub who does lease this place redecorates in stunning fashion & then Pauly steps in to evict, slaps the tenant with some specious lawsuit , and settles for keeping the house full of pricey furniture.

It could happen…

Anonymous said...

For $15,500 per month it's a bargain. You would be amazed what that would get you in Moscow.

caveman said...

how the hell is that house insured?
hope it has wheels.

E said...

That infinity pool edge makes my vertigo kick in. Yikes!

Anonymous said...

Any 714- agree, what's with the TV?

Maybe Pauly hasnt watched television since he was last actually on the televsion?

Anonymous said...

what a mess - look at vitual global trotting birds eye view of this place and there is 2 massive land slides off this property. $500,000 tops for this place.

Anonymous said...

That explains the two strippers I saw stumbling down that driveway recently. In the middle of the day. Or it could have been two of Pauly Shore's blonde, busty cousins, in bikinis and heels, jumping into a beat-up Honda (good thing there's ample parking, since Pauly doesn't let his relatives park in his driveway).

Anonymous said...

wonderful place

http://www.dhantube.com

SitDownKaren said...

I agree with the majority. I like the pool but the home needs updating.

Also, I would never say P. Shore lived there. A black light would reveal WAYYYYYY to much!