Tuesday, June 3, 2008

Kimora Lee Simmons Is Flipping Out...Again

SELLER: Kimora Lee Simmons
LOCATION: Lime Orchard Road, Beverly Hills, CA
PRICE: $5,900,000 (reduced from $7,750,000)
SIZE: 5,923 square feet, 5 bedrooms, 8 bathrooms (per listing)
DESCRIPTION: Captivating country home remodeled to perfection. This wonderful family home is located in a guard gated celebrity enclave. Gated courtyard entry with sitting area and fireplace. Two-sty entry, formal living room w/ f/p, formal dining room and wet bar. Brand new gourmet kitchen with top of the line appliances opens to breakfast room, media/family room. Dark hardwood floors, large spacious master, beautiful bathrooms, wainscoting, leaded glass windows, great swimming pool and room for a tennis court.

YOUR MAMAS NOTES: A few weeks ago, our always well informed, funny and ridiculously reliable Fairy Godmother in Beverly Hills told Your Mama that wild and wacky bling queen Kimora Lee Simmons and her tall, dark and smoking hot man-friend Djimon Hounsou were out poking around and touring ten million dollar properties in the Bev Hills area.

Then late last night we received a secret communique from F.G. in B.H. that the former model turned fashion mogul put her 5 bedroom and 8 bathroom crib in the Bev Hills (Post Office) on the market with a $7,750,000 asking price. Many of the children will recall that Miz Simmons just bought this house in August of 2007 when she forked over the full $5,900,000 asking price for the 5,923 square foot "Country English" style residence on guard gated Lime Orchard Road.

Behawtcha's house gurl barely had time to organize Miz Simmons' damn shooz and other sparklee things and now it's time to pack 'em all up again. Pleeze. Your Mama would bet our long bodied bitches Linda and Beverly that is one bleary eyed and i-rate house gurl.

Anyhoo, listing information reveals that the house, which Your Mama discussed last year when Miz Baby Phat first purchased the place, includes a double height entrance hall, a brand spanking new kitchen with top of the line appliances–What? did you think Miz Phat was shopping at Sears for a damn stove?–a large media/family room, three fireplaces, loads of leaded glass windows, newly dark-stained hardwood floors, and out back, a swimming pool. Interestingly the listing information we received says there is "room for" a tennis court. However, when Miz Simmon's purchased the place last year it already had one in place and, in fact, was being marketed as a "tennis court estate." Did Miss Thing rip the old one out? Anyone? Bueller? Bueller?

Your Mama has talked ad nauseum about this little celebrity enclave on Lime Orchard Road. By now all the children should know that when not following her football stud beau-friend Tony Romo around, fast fading singer/ack-tress Jessica Simpson lives in the gorgeous house next door to Miz Baby Phat, around the corner is Hollywood honcho Tom Freston, up the road is mega music manager Guy Oseary and music maestro Ron Fair recently had his contemporary Lime Orchard Road house on the market for $4,795,000, and it now appears to be in escrow.

The bi-racial bombshell's insanely opulent 35,000 square foot mansion in Saddle River, NJ–the one she shared with her soon to be ex-huzband Russell Simmons and their two kiddies–is still on the market with an asking price of $19,888,000 (reduced from the $23,888,000). Apparently there just aren't that many $20,000,000 buyers in New Jersey who desire 10 bedrooms, two swimming pools (indoors and outdoors, baby), a customized movie thee-ay-ter, and a garden room with a freaky fireplace mantle that looks like the gaping maw of a lion. Ugh.

These Lime Orchard Road properties seem to be quite desirable among the rich and the rich and famous, so while Your Mama thinks it's kinda unseemly for Miz Baby Phat to ask a whopping $1,850,000 more than she paid for the place 10 months ago, we still think this place will sell quickly...and at a profit.

28 comments:

luke220 said...

What about Ed McMahon's home in the Summit close to foreclosure? Maybe they should lower the price?

bentley said...

I like this house. I wish the staircase was a bit wider, but the panels are great, and the whitewashed look works for me. Great kitchen.

The Saddle River house = atrocious beyond words.

Why do some insist on those creepy little statues of children on benches and leaning up against trees? Terrible decision.

Anonymous said...

I think it's overpriced, but to those for whom money is no object, that's not an issue. That aside, I find nothing at all compelling about this house. The interior renovation looks rather bland and typical to me actually, so for nearly $8 million, I'd keep looking.

Anonymous said...

8:22, agree. The exterior of the home is charming, but the interior has an all to readily identifiable run of the mill rehab look to it, and they don't even try to match or compliment each other, a real estate no-no for anyone asking top dollar.

Anonymous said...

What a dumb ass she is; how could anyone with business sense sell in this market - of course with a few exceptions - the reality is those that sell in this market are:

1) Dumb Deluxe
2) Need to Cash out

This is how its going to go; she'll have the palce listed and won't budge on the price thinking it will be sold becasue its a KIMORA home; LOL. She will then drop once or twice and then pull it off the market. The LOT sucks.

sandpiper said...

Sort of a mess inside, isn't it? Reported to have sat on the market a year-ish before she bought it.

Isn't she pregnant? Whatever.

sandpiper said...

PS: Bentley, we seldom disagree. Are you running a fever? Kidding. :)

Anonymous said...

Hey in this market you never know, CNN business is hinting that the US banks are about to go belly up, lehman bros. is going out of business and yet somewhere out there there will be those that have the cash to buy high end properties at any price and they do not want to wait for the prices to come down, they want to buy NOW so she may find one of those buyers.

pch said...

Good location, but not feeling this place. I'm not into that 80s version of Tudor -- makes me think of condos in Woodland Hills. That driveway is gonna be a pain in the ass to negotiate unless there's a garage door on the other side, too, and you can pull straight through. It also drives me crazy when people cram tennis courts, pools and the like onto smallish, flat lots. (Terraced down or up a hill in similarly compact settings, they don't seem quite so in-your-face.) And in this case, the tennis court has an essentially east-west orientation. Not ideal.

Anonymous said...

My first thought when I read that the tennis court appears to have been taken out was "good riddance". I'd rather have the yard.

Chris said...

Two questions from an innocent: (1) Do Hollyweird types put all their money into real estate and none into the stock market? (Restaurants also seem to be a favorite investment). (2) Do they do this because (a) they want to show off their wealth so people can see it? (b) they don't know nuttin' about the stock market or don't trust investments they can't see? or (c) because they think they can flip these at any time and get an outrageous price because their glamorous feet have trodden on the floors? Just askin'.

lil' gay boy said...

Sorry, I find this one almost as crass as the Jersey "establishment."

Faux Tudor half-timbering, acres of beige, and all of it crammed onto a corner lot.

No thank you.

Anonymous said...

Chris:

2(a)YES
2(b)YES
2(c)YES

Hollywood stars have a manager looking after their cash. Manager has to show that he is doing a good job. manager knows the top rela estate agents. Agent gives manager $$ in pocket for doing business. Been there, done that.

bentley said...

Sandpiper - No kidding! The weather in Toronto is so shite so far this spring that maybe I'm swayed by anything sunny, warm and California!?

Still think the interior is nice. I'm not gonna do somersaults and buy the place, but it's nice.

StPaulSnowman said...

Do you mean to tell me that an agent would actually do something that would financially benefit him at the expense of a movie star? Well, ghaaha...lee! In Minnesota we thought stars were sacred and that agents were all like E on that California reality show....Entourage. Live vicariously and learn.

sandpiper said...

Bentley, totally get your concept. Short of a condemned certificate, any prospective teardown in Malibu could be my revered dream property. I know only too well how far the bar can drift. :)

Anonymous said...

Yeah on her show on style network she was like "yeah we have 2 glass Sub-Zeros going hear and an $80,000 stove that the put your name on."

Anonymous said...

would someone please translate the above (2:30) post......who is her?

Anonymous said...

3:26 - "her" would be Kimora Lee Simmons, the owner of the house being discussed.

Anonymous said...

yeah jack ass in 3:26 who the hell do u think this post is about!!

Anonymous said...

jackass is one word..............ass.......hole

Jersey said...

All right, I'm confused. On Kimora's show last season, she supposedly bought a new place in Bev Hills after doing the helicopter fly-over, kiddie approval, etc. I thought I then read that in "reality", she never really went through with the purchase. So, is this that place after all? I didn't recall that it was Tudor on the outside, but maybe so (HATE Tudor even when it's real, BTW). OR, am I the only person here who watches crappy reality TV?

Inigo Jones said...

If you hate original tudor architecture it doesn't surprise me that you remember episodes of this type of television program.

Jersey said...

Yes, "Inigo", I prefer contemporary...something like Flavor Flave's crib...

Anonymous said...

She's got rid of some of the tudour stuff and replaced the tennis court with a lawn.

full website here
http://www.limeorchardestate.com/

Anonymous said...

This doesn't work for me.I half expect her to come out the front door in a terrycloth bathrobe and pink foam curlers.The place is tacky.From the wainscoting overload to the wrought iron spiral stairs.The outside looks like crab grass paradise.Good luck with this donkey.-D

Anonymous said...

This doesn't work for me.I half expect her to come out the front door in a terrycloth bathrobe and pink foam curlers.The place is tacky.From the wainscoting overload to the wrought iron spiral stairs.The outside looks like crab grass paradise.Good luck with this donkey.-D

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