Saturday, March 1, 2008

UPDATE: Nancy Riordan

Well, we knew it was coming, didn't we? Finally, the LA Times' celebrity real estate high priestess Ruth Ryon is reporting that Nancy Riordan, the estranged wife of former Los Angeles mayor Richard Riordan, did indeed sell her colossal Carbon Beach house just as Your Mama whispered to all the children back on the 11th of February.

However, Miz Ryon reveals that the selling price was not the $50-55,000,000 that Your Mama heard, but rather a spine tingling and staggering $68,000,000.

The 12,785 square foot house sprawls across three lots with more than 200 feet of prime ocean frontage and includes 8 bedrooms and 7 bathrooms according to Miz Ryon.

Hawt damn children, those buyers, who were described to Miz Ryon by local real estate agents as "rich Canadians," must have wanted that house something fierce.

UPDATE: It did not happen. Did y'all hear that? It. Did. Not. Happen.

124 comments:

Alessandra said...

Well, it's only something like $50mm in loonies. A bargain!

Anonymous said...

Wow. $68 large ones. Not bad. At $5,000 per sq ft she is only a bit over the condos selling in New York near Park Avenue

so_chic_darling said...

It's all very nice a luxe but I wonder what happens when you have a big storm and large waves?

Anonymous said...

The waves never reach the property - Carbon is a pretty wide beach ... The pic above is at high tide, still plenty of dry beach.

Considering what the smaller homes on Carbon sell for I really don't think $68M is out of the question ... Especially considering that large properties on Carbon rarely hit the market.

property pimp said...

She cleaned up... bought the one house for under 2,000,000 many years ago, and then two others in the past 10years for under 3,000,000...shacks... tore them down. built this house aprox 14,000 sq ft. at what $500 per sq ft? the whold ground floor required a huge cement slab.. so thats about a 40,000,000 profit........ you go girl

E.J. said...

I'm dying to say somthing pithy and funny but I should just admit that I'm jealous. I'd kill for that house. And dozens of others I see here.

Anonymous said...

List of Canadians by net worth

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Canadians_by_net_worth

Parker said...

I do really love this house and once you're up in the tens of millions, it's all like speaking Chinese to me anyway. Regarding high tide, etc., it's all good until a tsunami rolls in after our inevitable "big one" that will someday shake L.A.

Parker said...

I do really love this house and once you're up in the tens of millions, it's all like speaking Chinese to me anyway. Regarding high tide, etc., it's all good until a tsunami rolls in after our inevitable "big one" that will someday shake L.A.

Parker said...

sorry for the double post, i'm clearly having computer issues. or, maybe i'm just so overcome with jealousy that i can't type properly?

lil' gay boy said...

$68M?

It simply CANNOT be that cold in Canada; sure it's the beach, and a triple lot no less, BUT, take a closer look:

http://www.californiacoastline.org/cgi-bin/image.cgi?image=200601902&mode=sequential&flags=0&year=2006

Do you really want to live a life-threatening dash across PCH to get to that fugly strip mall for a soggy slice of "Brooklyn" pizza?

Besides, the house's facade has no coherence - more like three cottages joined together by Home Despot. Look at the house to the right; now there's a design program going on there.

Still, it is Carbon Beach; I just want a little more, oh, I don't know, room to breathe?

Parker, get yourself a Mac.

;-)

Anonymous said...

I am willing to bet big money that the new owners are
Heather Reisman and Gerry Schwartz.

Hugh James said...

But who are the Canadians?
All us up her want to know.
Does the wife happen to own a chain of book stores?
Or does the name Weston mean anything?

hjb

Mad Malibuan said...

LGB,

Through your many posts on Malibu properties in the past, you've well established you don't like Malibu and think it's a waste of money.

So there's really no need for you to keep flogging that dead horse is there? We all get it.

It's just not funny anymore. In fact, it's rude to all of us that live in and love Malibu.

Would you like me to to start talking about what a mess your beloved Long Island is? Because am I to think it's so much better living up with all those classy bitches like Victoria Gotti?

sandpiper said...

11:25,
Never may be too extreme. Nothing can ruin a day like having to shovel the beach out of your living room. It can happen, and has. At high tide, the water here is at the break wall.

Property Pimp,
Your estrapolation makes my brain hurt. There wasn't a tear down. It's a joining of 3 houses. I'm pretty sure of it.

sandpiper said...

11:25,
Never may be too extreme. Nothing can ruin a day like having to shovel the beach out of your living room. It can happen, and has. At high tide, the water here is at the break wall.

Property Pimp,
Your estrapolation makes my brain hurt. There wasn't a tear down. It's a joining of 3 houses. I'm pretty sure of it.

Hugh James said...

Your thinking like me.
Heather has the chain of book stores in Canada.
He's a raider for the most part.
Her husband and her have a lot of hollywood friends.
In Toronto they tore down three other ajoining propertys houses to expand their palace.
It would be rate up there with some of the more over the top places seen on this site.

hjb

larry the whale said...

time for a comedy break

http://tinyurl.com/2ecana

bentley said...

The Reisman/Schwartz family live in the same neighbourhood I do in Toronto. They did an amazing reno adjoining several very large homes. It severely pissed off neighbours, as the street is very narrow and winding, and the machinery clogged Crescent Rd. forever.

Somehow I doubt it's them, though. It doesn't seem like their style. Just a hunch.

No shortage of rich Canadians to pluck it up.

bentley said...

BTW, if you're interested:

maps.live.com.

It;s the compound on the south east corners of Cluny Dr/Crescent Rd.

Cheers,
b

property pimp said...

Its possible its a bad photo, but PLEASE DO NOT QUESTION MY INFORMATION. If I chose to , I will tell you what she had for dinner last night....... PLEASE.
The only thing remaining of the old structures is THE ENTIRE NEW STRUCTURES undesirable close proximity to one very annoying and very short billionaire

lil' gay boy said...

Mad Malibuan,

On the contrary, having been there, I do not hate Malibu, and I'm sure people wouldn't live there if they didn't love it.

Just poking a little fun at some of the downsides as we East Coasters see it. And my criticism is with the house itself, not the town. I simply don't care for its architecture (but love the one next door.)

And if you want TRULY vulgar, go to Google Earth and look for Mansion Lane & the North LIE Service Road in Jericho/Westbury, where Victoria Gotti's truly offensive compound sits.

It defies description in its vulgarity. So please, poke away; there's good and bad architecture EVERYWHERE.

Larry the Whale, thanks for the laugh!

BTW, look for a post on Rachel Hunter's site, chilruns, for some fun with Mama's show . . .

Mad Malibuan said...

LGB,

How nice for you to speak for how all East Coasters see Malibu. I'm sure they really appreciate that.

It's not your dislike of the Riordans architecture (which I agree isn't great) that I have a problem with. It's your repeated attempts at humor by putting down the size of the lots and the location of PCH and the road noise in Malibu. It's your stupid cracks about living across the pch from a nail salon. Not just in this thread but in many others about Malibu properties.

You should be so lucky to live in a house like this on the ocean in Malibu. Stick to what you know which is probably living with your mother in Levittown and commuting to your computer job.

Sorry all, but he just makes me so angry sometimes. I'll stop now. Promise. He won't. But I will.

Anonymous said...

Why don't you two just have a bitch slap contest and be done with it?

Now for a little humor:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MzOpjBOzMqA

Take a peek and be prepared to giggle

Peace
Joel

Polly said...

Malibu slapdown.I LOVE it!

Anonymous said...

Heather and Gerry's kids live in Los Angeles and I know they were renting a house in Malibu not that long ago-
I am not positive it is them, but lets call in a little more than an educated guess.

Anonymous said...

Polly - "Mad Malibuan" would just run and cower behind another alias. LGB and Mama have the patience of saints to put up with him/her.

Anonymous said...

What'd she have for dinner?

Anonymous said...

All kidding aside...there is a better picture of the house here:

http://www.californiacoastline.org/cgi-bin/image.cgi?image=200601901&mode=sequential&flags=0&year=2006

But look at the one to the left...wow...what a nice house. Pool, jacuzzi thingy and a courtyard. Malibu slapdown indeed. Makes me giggle a bit.

Peace
Joel

property pimp said...

I do not live in malibu, but have many friends who do and used to go there alot. but its definely a place where you want to stay and not have to drive in and out of..cause the traffic is horrendous.. but once you are there its paradise, so many times i came close to purchasing, especially on pt. dume. damn, another wish i would have could have..story, but it really is paradise. and look for the book about miki dora coming out in april, he is story is really something to read about

LA Ad guy said...

Hey Prop P, I didn't know that Nancy and Dick separated, what's up with that? They dated for SO many years and then got married now separated....I couldn't find any stories about it...what's the scoop? someone else involved?

LA Ad guy said...

And PP, love your comment about DG...too funny!

property pimp said...

Well, her first choice in her new home in belair was to have esmerella drive down those winding roads to the subway shop in westwood, (her favorite) but ultimately she sampled one of those trader joe micorwave salmon filets that the maid said her sister had picked up(the new house is being remodeled as she lives in it) and it was quite filling......it just so peaceful here and to be far far away from that angry little man, (who wishes he was a blonde tall model. according to his fired biographer)well, lets just say. life is good with 40mill in the bank, too bad about that bullshit riordian pulled, but more about that later

Anonymous said...

Joel, the house to the left is Jeffrey Katzenberg's (Dreamworks)

Anonymous said...

Another possibility is Kelly Rowan, formerly of the "OC," and her fiancee, the 3rd Baron Thomson of Fleet, Canada's richest man. Obviously she doesn't need to age on television anymore, but they might want a house in Malibu. If it is them, then Larry Ellison is perhaps no longer the richest resident of the area.

lil' gay boy said...

Joel,

Thanks for the photo of what turned out to be Katzenberg's house - now we're talking!

Property Pimp,

Saw a couple of uncorrected proofs of the book you mentioned - I'll have to grab one before they're all gone . . . (if only for the cover!)

;-)

Nail salon owner said...

There's nothing wrong with a nail salon in Malibu the girls out here need fierce claws.

property pimp said...

well, my book is coming, i was the first to get the leo grannis at 15pounds, and of course have his signed photos.. which have now tripled in value, but who cares, i just want anything that is related to this golden era of surfing and malibu before the vallyites invaded and malibu boy toy realtors took over. miki dora was the real thing, never sold his soul.......... he is my hero. go to the dora wall at surf rider beach to see the dora lives if you can get around the wanna be surfers from encino.. better yet, pull up the vanity fair article from last year, the best ever

Alessandra said...

I'll say it. That's a lot of money for very little privacy. I know Malibu. I like Malibu in theory. I think that $68mm for that property is breath-takingly insane.

But whatever. If you have the money, spend it as you please. When I invest $68mm in a home, my first concern will be privacy and location. My second will be acreage and my third will be architectural interest of the home. Obviously, this buyer had other priorities. Just don't tell me that you have to be two feet from your neighbor to have a nice spread of oceanfront property.

Ma-lee-boo Boy Toy said...

I agree with Alessandra. By the way Ale, you embody your posting in a well educated way, Did you study the language of lawyers?

lil' gay boy said...

Alessandra,

Once again, thank you for putting it in much more diplomatic terms than I did. And I see that our concerns for a property are much in accord.

Went to the beach on a chilly night like tonight because the sky was so crystal clear and perfect for stargazing with a family friend from Sands Point; he knows a little used public accessway to the beach where, facing west, you can watch the sun set behind the lights of Manhattan from across the Sound; although without the Towers it's just not the same and never will be.

And if you turn around and face east, you can see the 1907 colonial with its massive "Gone With The Wind" porch columns built by Stanford White that served as the inspiration for F. Scott Fitzgerald's Daisy Buchannan house in The Great Gatsby.

The house was put on the market, on 13 acres and 1200' of shoreline (surrounded by a nature preserve) about a year ago for $50M; it was quickly pulled off market and placed back on at a more reasonable $29.5M. It is no longer listed.

BTW, the particular spot we were standing on was where Beacon Towers, the inspiration for Jay Gatsby's house, stood; sadly Hearst pulled it down in 1947, although the gatehouse and other buildings remain as private residences surrounded by an 8 foot high wall that encircles the pennisula.

I am learning there are similar situations in LA from my recently purchased books; every area of this country has some story of equal pathos and rampant greed, where shoddy construction, poor taste and the striving for a quick buck has practically drown us in McMansions.

'night now - it's late here; church tomorrow.

Anonymous said...

Why is it that when ever large prices are being discussed, people bring up other properties that can be bought for less that they , i guess feel are a steal when compared to the discussed property? its so irrelevant. i mean, people live at carbon beach and pay these prices, cause its well carbon beach.. i am sure you can buy a 14,000 sq ft house in wyoming with amazing views and 20,000 acres.for 10,000,000 but who the f*&^k cares.......... its not the same... this is billionairs row and obviously billionrars like to live next to other billionairs.

Anonymous said...

Why is it that when ever large prices are being discussed, people bring up other properties that can be bought for less that they , i guess feel are a steal when compared to the discussed property? its so irrelevant. i mean, people live at carbon beach and pay these prices, cause its well carbon beach.. i am sure you can buy a 14,000 sq ft house in wyoming with amazing views and 20,000 acres.for 10,000,000 but who the f*&^k cares.......... its not the same... this is billionairs row and obviously billionrars like to live next to other billionairs.

lil' gay boy said...

Anon 11:45,

You said "this is billionairs row and obviously billionrars like to live next to other billionairs." This may be slightly flawed thinking.

Possibly, because as Alessandra so eloquently put it: "My first concern will be privacy and location. My second will be acreage and my third will be architectural interest of the home."

There's a ranch currently on the market in Colorado for $135M; why? Because someone wants to live there instead of Carbon Beach. And, as a Middle Eastern prince, he has just about as much money as God, and doesn't want to live next to other billionaires. That's why he built where he did; his reasons for selling are unknown - perhaps he misses the desert.

There's no denying that Carbon Beach is "Billionaire's Row", but not everyone wants to live there; some like their privacy and to be surrounded by a different sort of nature and silence. Not everyone worships the Pacific as you do.

Hence the disparity in pricing you find distressful.

Everyone who razzes here about living on Carbon Beach, or other Malibu enclaves, does not do so out of jealousy; it is simply not to their taste, and that should be respected; we in turn should perhaps lighten up on what is clearly a close knit community.

Have we got a deal?

Anonymous said...

lil' gay boy: Yes, it is that cold in Canada. In particular this year, one of the coldest and snowy winter's on record. Well, that's if you are living in Toronto. These are no "snowbirds", they are "snoweagles" being able to plunk down that much money.

lil' gay boy said...

Anon 12:53,

Snoweagles, I like it!

Anonymous said...

you have got to be fucking kidding me. is he for real? that's just sad.

Wanda Sykes said...

On one side of this place is Terry Semel and on the other is Jeffrey Katzenberg. No offense, but you'd know that if you read the actual posts here about the property.

bentley said...

The Thomson home in Toronto is grand, but tired. There is an equally tired Mercedes 300E in the driveway. While they are avid art collectors and philanthropists, I don't see them buying a house on "billionaire's row" on Carbon Beach. They maintain an extremely low profile.

It's a balmy -7C and sunny in Toronto this morning. That's tanning weather after this winter.

Anonymous said...

Morning all!
I'm curious about something as I was looking over the pictures of the Carbon Beach area in Malibu...is there public access anywhere? Can all this beach sand be considered private property?

And in this photo:

http://www.californiacoastline.org/cgi-bin/image.cgi?image=200601902&mode=sequential&flags=0&year=2006

What's that long narrow building to the right up on the hillside? That must have one sweet view. Enjoy your Sunday

Peace
Joel

Anonymous said...

Joel

There are 2 public access ways on Carbon ... The beach is a private beach, public below the mean high tide line [wet sand] though to build many of these homes the owners had to allow public easements so many of the larger newer homes have dry areas of sand in front of them for the public to use ...

I'm as usual dismayed by the comments on here when it comes to Malibu. People blabbing on & on about Malibu who know nothing about f*cking Malibu! ... Yes, the homes are close - but it's the beach & land values don't allow you to have 10 acres! Probably 90% of the homes on Carbon are used at weekends / summer so it's no big deal - their properties in west LA likely have the requisite acres for privacy ...

Don't let the pictures fool you. These properties are absolutely massive & they are fairly private ... Walking along the beach you can't see into them b/c they sit up fairly high & the beach obviously slopes down towards the water ...

As for being close to PCH - that can't be helped. You have ocean, a tiny bit of land then mountain - there is no way around that ... & lastly, the stores on the landside of PCH - do you really think the residents of Carbon use them? No! The Country Mart is 2 mins north, Santa Monica is 10 mins south .. with good stores / restaurants galore in both locations.

Wicked Witch of the West said...

I'm with you anon up there...I don't know where all these people go to the beach. As a general rule, most ocean front properties in CA are set very close to each other...don't like it? Don't live on or visit the the beach in CA.

There are exceptions to that rule, of course, even in Malibu.

However, most of these people who are whining about Malibu probably do not live in urban areas where people live tightly packed and certainly they don't live along the coast of Cal. where land is at a premium and people WILLINGLY choose to live so close to each other.

All those whiners can have their 1 acre lots in suburban Dayton and Milwaukee or whatever Midwestern mess they live in with their 3 kids and a minivan. I'd rather live in LA where I can see right into my neighbors family room from my bedroom. We all have our preferences.

Alessandra said...

Anon 6:25am...I regret to inform you that I do know Malibu and in my professional opinion, this price is crazy for the reasons I stated in my previous post. I'm not a Malibu hater. I'm not a real estate detractor. I even think that some properties are under priced, even in a sagging market (not that you'd know the market had problems from the way billionaires are snatching up real estate, which should be a hint). But, let's agree to disagree on this issue, since I doubt we're going to have any meeting of the minds, much less civility on this issue, any time soon.

ma-lee-boo boy toy, I'm not a lawyer; just have had extensive training in contracts from two different careers and have learned through bitter experience how to speak diplomatically, instead of bluntly telling someone what I think. Like that they're fucking nuts, for example.

Anonymous said...

I agree that $68M is out of this world. And I agree the house isn't going to win any arch. awards.

But it costs what it costs.

Anonymous said...

anon 7:01 again here:

P.S. all due respect Allesandra because you seem like a good egg to me, but diplomacy is over rated in my book. Sometimes it just feels good to call an asshole and asshole, you know?

Anonymous said...

My thanks to anonymous 6:25AM for clearing the beach access item up.

I do think it's interesting how angry some folks are in regards to "The Malibu Slapdown" but I'm having a difficult time figuring out why. Different strokes for different folks right? I have friends who live in far northeastern California, wedged between Oregon and Nevada, and they love it but you wouldn't see me living there. Doesn't mean they haven't made the right choice for them.

I wouldn't choose to live so close to my neighbors but, you know what, my pockets aren't deep enough to even consider trying it out to see if I would like it. So, that being said, why do I giggle each time I think about padding next door to the Katzenback's for a cup of sugar?

Peace
Joel

aerialdave said...

Does anybody have any idea how long it will take before we will find out who the "rich Canadians" are who bought this property? (either officially through property records or other reliable sources)

lil' gay boy said...

It occurs to me that Malibu must be a very close knit community for its residents and lovers to react so vehemently to any criticism expressed by an outsider who might consider living there a drawback.

In my mind that makes it a very special place indeed - you don't often find communities with that sense of pride anymore.

So please understand - we get it. It's a very special place and you love it; but it is simply not everyone's cup of tea.

For example, Riordan's house is an architectural mess, but the houses on either side I'd go for in a hot New York minute; they both have a touch of the de Menil "Toad Hall" about them that I find very attractive.

so_chic_darling said...

In the end the rich Canadians don't give a shit what all of us think because spending 68 million for them is like spending $68 for most people,they've got the loot and they want the house on the beach.end of story.

Alessandra said...

Heh. Indeed, so chic darling.

What is this property's exact address?

I love malibu said...

Malibu certainly shakes things up here. Cuious how some who don't live on the beach or in the neighborhood opine. Malibu is not for everybody, and that's ok. Those that make a home here know the quality of life in this community.

The Riordan property, an extensive remodel, draws largely on the pre-existing structures. The resulting mansion and seawalls were made possible by greasing the political wheel, and nothing more. The opposition was tremendous.

Her seawall was, at time of permit, and remains a serious concern to the Coastal Commission and residents. These barriers contribute to beach errosion. Nancy's revised beach-facing side of property is protected from Mother Nature's whim and high tide variables. It's unfortunate.

For those who doubt Mother Nature, please compare Joel's link [Mar.2, 3:42} to Mama's picture above. The 4 bottom steps on Riordan's breakwall have already disappeared.

How her permit was acquired:

http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/chronicle/archive/2002/10/20/MN161191.DTL

Anonymous said...

Anon 6.25am again ...

I realise that to some people the neighbors are close but when you grow up in Manhattan & other heavily populated cities with neighbors above & below it's no biggy ... You have to be realistic when it comes to living on the beach in Malibu, if you want acreage then buy a landside property where you can have a huge estate for the price of a 3 bed beach house ...

I think what bothers those who live in Malibu is the constant defending we need to do ... on blogs, newspapers, websites, t.v ... it seems that locals need to defend themselves & their town constantly ... if people aren't complaining about the home prices we pay they're complaining about us building in an area thats prone to fire, or when we have a fire they're complaining about the news only covering 'the rich' in Malibu or the media & other parts of LA are complaining that Malibu got special treatment & more firefighters than other areas or they're complaining that our insurance providers hire private fire companies to coat our homes in fire retardant, or they're complaining that we want to keep our beaches totally private, or complaining about reclaiming the sand on broad beach, complaining about the private security we need to hire to patrol the beaches, complaining about access gates to beaches, complaining about PCH & the lack of bicycle lanes, complaining about traffic on PCH ... complaining about the amount of celebrities, complaining about local surfers ... I could go on & on, the list is endless!

If you google any of the above you'll be linked to articles, forums, blogs etc.. with these stories & peoples criticisms ... I just wonder if you scratch the surface of the words it's all to do with jealousy?

Alessandra, I was in no way singling you out before ... sorry if I offended you, I didn't mean too.

As for the Canadian, I say Louise MacBain - just a guess!

i love malibu said...

11:19--You are so full of it. You don't live in Malibu. You haven't even been there.

Barren Karen said...

Dear I Love Malibu,

Why do you think 11:19 is full of it?

Love, BK

P.S. I love Malibu too.

Anonymous said...

I Love Malibu [11.41]

Grow the f*ck up! I've bn commenting on here about Malibu since this blog began - look back in the Malibu archives & you'll see my long winded replies, not to mention my detailed descriptions of the California Coastal Commission V's La Costa Homeowners law suit & a multitude of other things .... You appear to be a newbie, at least ur name is anyway so don't come on here calling me a liar ...

As far as I'm concerned you could be typing from Arkansas rather than Malibu, So Chic from West Virginia rather than the West Village, PCH from South Carolina rather than Southern California, Ed from Westwood could be Ed from Western Australia ... thats the thing about the internet

Anyway, you're partly correct - most of the time I'm in NY ... If you really are from Malibu then perhaps everyone is correct about the ignorant nature of the locals - then again, you may just be someone who's served me at Starbucks ... so which one is it, Country Mart or Trancas? You don't seem educated enough for Coffee Bean.

i love malibu said...

Barren Karen,
Malibu-ites respect how the tides act and how to be at peace with this piece of nature.

11:19/property pimp is some form of warped voyer lacking familiarity or understanding of this town. That is my best call.

Alessandra said...

Anon 11:19, I get it. In the immortal words of Joel, "peace."

so_chic_darling said...

West Virginia? excuse me anon 12.09,but I've never been there.If I was not in the West Village then how would I be able to give Mama tips about local real estate here in 10014 weeks before they even break in the press?I have however been to malibu many times and I'm a big fan.

lil' gay boy said...

I am definitely NOT from Malibu; so can I ask you Malibuans (is that the correct term?) what it was like growing up there?

I'm sure you're not all billionaires, and some must resent their invasion of your space.

What was it like for a long time resident to endure the tide of the mega rich?

It seems to me that in my travels that seaside communities share a special bond - what ties you together?

i love malibu said...

Oh my. You might be a fu*king idiot. In fact I'm sure of it. The weak and insecure (property pimp/ed/joe) is defensive? Insecure? March to your amber bottles and own your condition. Or, tell us about Malibu with accuracy. I don't think you can.

Anonymous said...

"11:19/property pimp is some form of warped voyer lacking familiarity or understanding of this town. That is my best call"

Oh shut up ... Every single thing I mentioned has been in the media & caused debate where Malibu & Malibu residents have had to defend themselves ... Perhaps we're just from totally different circles - here's hoping.

Barren Karen said...

FIGHT!!!

It must be so nice for LGB to finally have people angry at someone besides him.

Anonymous said...

Propoerty Pimp,

Calm down PP. So you don't live in Malibu, admit it and give it up. You're boring and impossible to take seriously. Go back to being ed from westwood. At least that was entertaining.

Anonymous said...

So Chic Darling ...

I know you're from the West Village, I was just demonstrating my point ... I've yet to discover if I've been in your store ; )

Anyway everyone, I'm moving on from the Malibu arguing ... I think 'I love Malibu' is an original - the kind that avoids Nobu, lives at the Point Dume Club & thinks the rich have destroyed their bucolic little town [before you start, I'm not professing I'm rich!] ... Well, times change & I'm sure many other residents lack an "understanding" ... I certainly don't appear any different to them.

Anonymous said...

Lastly, sorry I couldn't help it ...

"Malibu-ites respect how the tides act and how to be at peace with this piece of nature"


Thats the best! Are you for fucking real? Yeah, the Ellisons, Spielbergs, Katzenbergs, Arquettes not to mention many more seem really concerned about respecting tides & being at peace storming along PCH in their Range Rovers - Give me a f*cking break!

Anonymous said...

PP, You got caught being stupid. You are very different from anyone-eastcoast- westcoast, Guam or Siberia. You'll never be confused with a Malibu visitor or resident. You are neither.

property pimp said...

wow,this sure is an angry bunch.. again, the house is not a remodel, you don't build a huge concrete slab above the sand on a remodel,what do you think she spent all that money jsut to jack up three old shacks to put cement under them? don't be foolish, often times new construction is listed as remodel and on small fireplace of anything of the old structure is left there so it qualifies for a remodel permit... next. many of us have friends in malibu , as i said, its a beautiful place, but the people have no claim to anything special. and as for carbon beach, I never said its was a paradise, its a strange little stretch of barren beach, that some billionaires decided to form their own little enclave. nothing special about it at all, at night, all you see is pitch black ocean, and the freeway on the other side, alot better to live in sierra retreat up on the hill i feel, I have a place in santa monica, and the b. hills, so i could live anywhere ever i want, and I chose not to live there, because of the drive.

Polly said...

I love these Sunday afternoon fights that break out here when the children get restless and Girl at the bar has got everyone drunk on a couple of pitchers,oh yes please I'll have another glass.

Anonymous said...

PP / ed,

Take your meds and call it a day.

lil' gay boy said...

Girl at the Bar,

We're gonna need another pitcher of your world famous Bloody Marys - this time with a little more horseradish, please?

Girl at the bar said...

I'll be at Duke's barefoot bar for the sunset and happy hour!

Joan Crawford said...

During Whatever happened to Baby Jane I knitted a scarf from Hollywood to Malibu.

Anonymous said...

I have to say that "PP" is the absolute best nickname anyone has come up with for ed/joe/propertypimp/everyotheraliashehasused.

Pass me a fresh one, Girl At The Bar.

bentley said...

Me, too, I'm still hungover from Thursday and I'm having a planes, trains and automobiles farce trying to get back to New York. God help me. Actually, no, girl at the bar help me:)

Woodford Reserve, pretty please. Do you deliver?

lil' gay boy said...

Bentley,

Hair of the dog (whatever you were drinking) is always best.

Add a Xanax if you've got it - but only one. Doesn't help so much with the physical symptoms, but you'll care a little less about how you feel.

Don't mix your poisons; take it from an expert. Good luck and feel better; traveling in you're "delicate" condition is the ninth circle of hell . . .

lil' gay boy said...

Bentley,

BTW, there's nothing like a Rohypnol to endure a hangover; the world just goes away for 6 to 8 hours and you wake up feeling human again.

I'd FedEx you one if I could . . .

Anonymous said...

I know most of you don't want to hear this and won't believe me anyway, but even though Property Pimp sounds like he's loaded a lot of the time, he's actually got far better inside information that most of you seem to think. You just gotta read between the lines of cocaine. No offense PP, because I really am defending you. We must know some of the same people.

property pimp said...

well, i think that is a compliment, but aside from a couple of coctails maybe three times a week, i never do drugs, so that part you have wrong, no tolerence and probably if you would want to hit a hot button that would be it.. i have seen to many people mess up their lives around here with drugs, i would never touch them, ever...... but i do like my coctail no and then, but i have discipline or i would not have achieved what i have, thank you

propery pimp said...

now, I am going to chill my glass in the freezer till we get to an acceptable hour, check my sunday massage appt..(he cancels sometimes)and go on with my life.. its not movie star glamorous but it very very good, and i say thanks everyday.. why on earth do people think property pimp has alias..that is another misconception, although i do admit to wanting to ruffle one very boring average joes feathers once by posing as mrs average joe..average jane, but that is the only weak momemnt i will cop to, i just could not resist

average joe said...

Property Pimp, you are beginning to lose crediblity with us, a couple of opinions is fine but if you keep on making you point over and over again you start to sound like a homeless hobo, make your point and move on.......

Polly said...

Where's that pitcher?

Alessandra said...

Pitcher? I think we need a vat.

Anonymous said...

average joe
you have lost your credibility many many posts/months past.
bar at the girl.. or..um girl at the whatever just..another round for evbody..quick!

Anonymous said...

Hey I Love Malibu...Thanks for the heads up regarding the pictures of the seawall in question. I just looked at both pictures and you're right. The sand has covered, or washed away the bottom steps and it looks like it's being undermined the seawall itself on the left side. Interesting.

And, I have to tell you, as a long time restaurant person...the phrase "Girl At The Bar" makes me LAUGH. Holy crap does that make me belly laugh. Thanks for the giggle.

Peace
Joel

sandpiper said...

What did I miss?

Bentley, I do hope you don't have a melt down at the rent-a-car counter tonight (Gobble. Gobble.) I can just picture it. You will look like Steve Martin to me from now on! :)

lil' gay boy said...

Sandpiper,

Better him than John Candy . . .

;-)

sandpiper said...

Little Buddy,

I love John Candy. He was such a sweetheart.

Anonymous said...

Rich Canadian? Dan Aykroyd? Mike Meyer?

Anonymous said...

uncle buck!

:)

sandpiper said...

Yes. Wasn't he the best in that?

lil' gay boy said...

Andrea Martin, perhaps?

lil' gay boy said...

Woo hoo!

Over 100 posts because Mama took the day off . . .

Hope it was one hell of a shindig, Mama; your chilruns are about to rip each other apart!

Opie said...

That is the rich canadian who bought the place, John Candy !!!!

lil' gay boy said...

Opie,

I'm still hoping it's Andrea Martin - who wouldn't want to live next door to Edith Prickly?

You could always saunter over to borrow a cup of Canadian Clu . . . um, I mean sugar.

;-)

Anonymous said...

Jeezis H. Kah-riste! I believe when mama returns that she is going to open a can of " whoop ass" and smack you kiddies down and force you to get back in line. This is a hoot! :-)

lil' gay boy said...

Ain't it though?

But as has been said:

"It Takes A Village"; (somewhere a village is missing its idiot, but I think I know where we can locate him easily enough);

• Just didn't know it would be the "Village of the Damned";

Peopled by the "Children of the Corn";

• On the set of "The Night of the Living Dead".

Dear sweet Jeezus have mercy on our souls; Mama's gonna have to stop at a Costco's for a humongous family-sized can of whoop-ass big enough for this crowd today!

I just pray that she went easy on the G&Ts and that Dr. Cooter drove, slowly and agilely past Ms. Rachel Hunter's pot-holed street.

DailyCelebs.TV said...

It doesn't even look like a house, looks like a commercial property. Maybe they can sell some hot dogs on the sidewalk. That is just wrong. It doesn't have a homey feeling to it at all.

bentley said...

6'2, brown hair, blue eyes, 175lbs.

Andrea Martin is hot, though. So was John Candy.

I made it home.

Sandpiper: "I want a fucking car, right fucking now."

Aquaman said...

am i the only one to suspect that mister pimp reeks of bona fides and discreet info?

maybe that's what's making the mob so cranky.

Anonymous said...

I dont think the new owners are Heather Reisman and Gerry Schwartz. They recently purchased a $18 million home in Nantucket and I believe they have a home in Bel Air.
Who are these wealthy Canadians??
anyone have any idea?

somebody's sister said...

Hi Aquaman,

I do think he impresses at first blush. After yesterday's blood bath, I tracked back to the foundations of his insight, and it wasn't hard to do. Long story short...sloppy assumptions and borrowed authority without merit or premise. He's cagy at what he does. Of greater importance...don't believe everything you read.

property pimp said...

What in the h*ll was that. somebodys shitster is more like it. since when did a majority of the people on this site start talking like mr. french of that old show family affair. you can twirl and twist your words but its still going go come out crapola.The information i "share" is factual, if you believe otherwise, then just state that and provide some evidence , you cannot, and I am sure after posting your little sassy say nothing song and dance you sat back and said.."hmmm , that sounds so clever...yes yes yes... POST"... well, it confirms what once I once over heard a R.E head say to his Bh hills office mgr. STOP HIRING F*GS AND H*AGS in the biz, cause thats what its made up of.. .. no bullshit here... well here comes mamas wooden spoon, I hope its big and splintery, i like it that way

Barren Karen said...

FIGHT!!!

I'm with PeePee on this one...

Somebody's Sister (whose syntax is an awful lot like the lovely Sandpiper) might think he's full of crapola, but I know different.

sandpiper said...

Hey Barren Karen,
Woah my little edgy one- LOL. Please keep me out of this mess. I'm not sure of you yet, but you seem nice enough. Why attack me?

Barren Karen said...

Sandy-P,

I wasn't attacking...You'd know if I was attacking.I said you were lovely and I wasn't being sarcastic, although I understand how you might misunderstand, because I usually am being sarcastic.

I'm just saying the Somebody's Sister is adopting your syntax. So watch out girl.

I'm still with PeePee though. He's got the info. He just rambles around it sometimes. I think he's cute.

Polly said...

I think Mama is looking for a bat this time!
Watch out.

property pimp said...

I hate it when people figure out I'm full of shit and a fag all in one day.

Anonymous said...

Let's all find our center and do a cleansing breath. Ohm-mmmm.

lil' gay boy said...

Oh, for God's sake, someone just get a ruler and put and end to all this.

caveman said...

after reading the last 10 or so messages, i feel like i owe you folks a cover charge.

sandpiper said...

Good one, C-B!

I feel like I'm at that Chicago restaurant famous for abusive waiters that yell at the customers -- and that's why the customers go there. LOL

sanddpiper said...

This does disturb me -
Look at LGB 1:07 link. I did. I now get what others were talking about. The beach is taking over seawalls of neigbors. Look at how much the adjoining older seawalls are filled up with sand. That's not good, even if I don't live there.

Anonymous said...

While not very impressive from that shot in the air .This house is beautiful inside,I had that privilidge once as the "driver".Dark wood flooring throughout,white walls,tasteful art work,and oceans views from just about the whole house .Not to mention that peaceful wave crashing sound of the Pacific.My time was brief ,but it is a very impressive home.

It is the home of Reisman & Schwartz.

The Driver

Anonymous said...

While not very impressive from that shot in the air .This house is beautiful inside,I had that privilidge once as the "driver".Dark wood flooring throughout,white walls,tasteful art work,and oceans views from just about the whole house .Not to mention that peaceful wave crashing sound of the Pacific.My time was brief ,but it is a very impressive home.

It is the home of Reisman & Schwartz.

The Driver