Saturday, March 24, 2007

Annie Duke Folds in Outpost Estates

SELLER: Annie Duke
LOCATION: Outpost Circle, Los Angeles, CA
PRICE: $3,000,000
SIZE: 3,528 square feet, 4 bedrooms, 4 bathrooms
DESCRIPTION: 1928 Spanish by architect Marshall Wilkinson located in Outpost Estates, the premier Hollywood Hills location. Modern comforts w/tons of original character & details such as wrought iron railings, Spanish tile, hardwood flrs, exposed beam ceilings & iron light 4 bedrm & 4 ba rm, large guest house with own bathroom. Views of Hollywood Hills. Large backyard with waterfalls & fountains.

YOUR MAMAS NOTES: Your Mama does not gamble. No siree bob. We like our money too much to give it away to some asshole in a mortifying Tommy Bahama shirt because we're not holding the right damn card. So we did not know who Annie Duke was until we called our friend Rock Hudson out in Las Vegas who clued Your Mama in. Turns out Rock loves to gamble and he was full of all sorts of information about Annie Duke.

We bet most people think professional poker players and gamblers are a shady and ignorant group of people. Let's face it people, gambling is an ugly and low class sport. And children, do not be sending Your Mama nasty little emails about how gambling is fun, Las Vegas is great and baccarat is the sport of kings. Ack! We do not want to hear it.

But Ms. Duke flips our notion of a professional gambler right on it's head. Not only does she come from a family of academics, she has a stellar education herself. Bitch not only graduated from the prestigious St. Paul's prep school in New Hampshire, she earned herself a double major in English and Psychology at Columbia University. We should all be impressed, because this lady is smarter than most of us.

And she's got an uncanny knack for card playing. Turns out this single mother of four has made millions holding, folding, bluffing, and betting at poker tables all over the world. But unfortunately for the Duchess of Poker, she is going to be losing out on the sale of her Los Angeles house.

See, Duke only purchased the property in July of 2005 and she paid $2,850,000. So even if she sells if for full price at $3,000,000, once she pays the realtor fees and capital gains, she's going to be in the hole a couple hundred grand.

The house, located up in Outpost Estates and not far from the house Jason Priestley has on the market for significantly less money, is a lovely example of the California Spanish style. While Your Mama would have trouble navigating all the stairs at this house, overall we really don't have much negativity about Duke's poker palace.

Straight aways we were inclined to appreciate this house because of the eclectic and personal style of the interior. We are quite sure Ms. Duke did not have a nice gay decorator come up in here and work some fag magic, but that's okay by us in this instance because she has been able to create a homey and comfortable environment anyway. The entrance hall could use a little jazzing up, but we think the living room is di-voon with it's high beamed ceiling and putty colored walls. We dig the pair of identical sofas, which acts as an effective counter-balance to the overall pleasing haphazard-ness of the room.

We appreciate that Ms. Duke has her children's artwork displayed on the walls. Your Mama is not partial to small children. We mostly find them to be loud and quarrelsome money pits until they get to be about 24 years old. None the less we do like to see mommies and daddies who encourage their babies to make art and show their appreciation by hanging their children's work on the walls.

There's little in the kitchen we would change. We like the simple white cabinetry with the dark wood floors and simple black counter-tops. We are impressed no one installed some of that horribly ubiquitous flecked granite shit up in here. We appreciate the wide window above the sink for daydreaming the troubles away while scrubbing the pots and pans. The lady-Bosch dishwasher was also a good choice.

The backyard climbs up the side of the hill and provides many charming and hidden nooks and crannies for smoking pot where the children cain't see you. Of course, we always love a secondary building in the backyard. We're not sure what this one is used for, but we imagine it could be a great place to stash the in-laws and other less than desirable guests.

From our wee bit of online research and our conversation with Rock, we understand Ms. Duke has relocated (or is soon to relocate) to Portland, Oregon. This move has something to do with her gig consulting with Ultimate Bet, an online gambling concern.

Nobody asked us, of course, but Your Mama is concerned Ms. Duke may have over-paid for her house and may have a difficult time selling her house at it's current asking price. The location is certainly good, and the house is magnificent. However, Your Mama wouldn't dream of paying upwards of 3,000,000 smackers for a house without a backyard swimming pool. We really do wish her all the best with getting a good price for this house.

Your Mama would also like to thank our friendly tatler friend Tammy Faye Baker, who gave us the lead on this property. Turns out Tammy Faye likes to play the poker too and she was up in this house recently getting her pocketbook emptied by Duke.

Sources: Annie Duke Online, Poker Player Profiles, Coldwell Banker, Everett Fenton Gidley


Anonymous said...

For the record, poker is a game of skill. not gambling.

Your Mama said...

hunny, if yer playing with money, it's gambling.

Anonymous said...

gambling, as in 'being reckless' perhaps. But it's not gambling, as in a game of chance, strictly speaking.

Your Mama said...

You split hairs all you want while you lose your paycheck at the poker table. Meanwhile Your Mama is going to count all the money we're saving by not visiting the casinos.

Anonymous said...

Although it seems high in price, it is refreshing to see a house not over done. The yard has an enclave feeling,love that.

NY Realtor

Anonymous said...

Poker is gambling, end of story! It is NOT a game of skill because there is NO way to know what cards you will draw unless you cheat. You can't use skill in a game of luck!

Anonymous said...

I don't wish to fight or split hairs with mama or any chilrun, but poker is not a game of chance, any more than any other card game is a game of chance. There are elements of chance, sure. If I'm wrong, why does the State of California allow poker rooms to exist (albeit regulated within 1.5 inches of their lives), while outlawing "gambling" casinos?

Anonymous said...

Are you people serious? Why is it so offensive to think of poker as gambling?

Anonymous said...

it's no more offensive than someone pointing out that it ain't. . . .

Anonymous said...

Poker is gambling, end of story, anyone who says it isn't is wrong and ignorant.

Anonymous said...

As of today, the price on this house has dropped to $2,875,000, only $25,000 more than she paid in 2006! Wow...

poker affiliate said...

Annie is a very talented woman. She started out in poker, but has used her celebrity to branch out into more mainstream opportunities. I think she has a bright future away from the table. I didnt realize just how much money she had to be living in a house like that!