Thursday, December 14, 2006

Lindsay cleans up


OWNER / SELLER: Lindsay Lohan
LOCATION: 9255 Doheny, West Hollywood
PRICE: $2,850,000
SIZE: 3 bedrooms, 2.5 bathrooms, 2,117 square feet
DESCRIPTION: Opportunity awaits. The most famous full service high rise in the city. This 3 bedroom, 2.5 bathroom Northwest corner uit is on the desirable 27th floor. Boasting killer ocean, city, sunset and Hollywood Hills views. Ready for your client to customize and make it their own ultimate retreat.

YOUR MAMAS NOTES: It is no secret to anyone who reads celebrity shit, or lives in Los Angeles, that the photo above is of the Sierra Towers apartment building in West Hollywood. And it is true that Ms. Lohan owns an apartment here. But don't be standing out front bugging the doormen and other tenants with your prying eyes, because La Lohan does not live here and has never occupied this apartment. (Her people state it was purchased as an investment in 2005 for $1,900,000.)

This poor ak-tress, whose every move, word and vaginal exposure is printed up in the tabs, has instead famously taken up residence at the paparazzi surrounded Chateau Marmont Hotel. (Interesting choice for someone looking for some privacy if anyone wants Your Mamas opinion.) Perhaps hotel living is just simpler for this fast living gal, even with all the strangers roaming the halls and photogs out front. This way she does not have to try and scramble her own late night eggs but rather can just scramble for the house phone after a late night at Teddy's or Hyde partying with HER mama.

By all accounts the Sierra Towers apartment is "dated" and needs loads of work. Even still this little lady stands to make a small fortune selling this apartment on. Even after she pays her people at the Westside Agency and whatever flip tax she'll be responsible for, she's likely to walk with upwards of $500,000. Not bad for a sub-par place that's just sat collecting dust for a year or two. All you babies should be so lucky in your real estate deals.

I'm sorry there are not more photos children, but neither the mls nor the listing agent's website had any other photos. I don't think the lack of photos is a privacy issue, but rather that the apartment is simply too undone.

EXTRA NOTE FROM YOUR MAMA: Your Mama wants you to have a little extra celebrity informaton on this building...Matthew Perry and Cher also maintain residences in this building along with a few other big name Hollywood types like Diahann Carol. As you know, Your Mama's mind is not what it used to be, but I seem to remember there was a lot of talk about Cher, who has resided in Malibu for many years in a spectacular ocean front estate, spending an astronomical sum of money for her apartment so that she could have a place in town near her hair and make up people. Can you imagine? Reportedly she paid around $4,500,000 smackers for a 1 bedroom duplex that at one time belonged to David Geffen. Yes, children, I did say a 1 bedroom apartment. And apparently she gutted it too. Phew...I guess that's what one does as a semi-retired celebrity with oodles of cash.